• Members of the previous forum can retrieve their temporary password here, (login and check your PM).

A Call To Arms

Migrated topic.
mattimus

mattimus

Rising Star
OG Pioneer
After entering a thc induced trance, some tea made with 10g caapi, 2g achuma, and passion flower extract, was drank with 40mg THH.
After that 80mg dmt citrate was consumed with 80mg caapi alks. It was 1:30AM and I laid down in bed.

After the S.H.E. I entered into a phase of renewal and healing and it has been an interesting week so far.
Spice is always changing functions on me and I rarely know what to expect any more. Maybe its due to an equivalent variety of emotional and mental states but either way I begin to realize the seriousness of what surrounds me and what this work requires of me.

+25 minutes, typical onset, OEVs build as I slowly begin slipping out of my body.

+40 minutes, the journey begins
I have been getting better and better at navigating but communication is still beyond me.
I desperately cling to an intention, "I seek growth, I seek courage, Teach me to show no fear",
I follow along up vertically through a tunnel into a room with everybody seated in a circle, there is much chatter but I just sit in awe trying to figure out what this place is, it seems to be a briefing or meeting of sorts.
We then file along into the machine room where I start to get worked on but then we all enter what seems to be a mine.
There are people working all around, beckoning me to join them, even intimidating me! I redirect to an intention,
"How do I protect against evil, teach me to have no fear"

+1 hour, The next 30 minutes are an intense wave of peaks of some scary parts of hyperspace but they show me how to overcome the fear.
Only when I fully surrender to the experience and cling to a positive intention can I break free of the madness.
"Nothing will ever hurt you, this IS you" but it just continues to get weirder and the spasms/vibrations begin.
My whole body begins vibrating with the intense visuals and I slowly lose intention, this just gets way too intense.
I know I'll be safe and sane in the end but why do I do this again??? Why would I do this to myself? Maybe I'm missing something?

What do you guys personally do to maintain your intentions throughout the entire experience?

+1.5 hours, eyes finally open and spice-vision is fully enabled, the only clear path is one that leads to the toilet.
The purge is quick but something feels different now. A wave of uneasiness comes upon me. I was totally caught off guard by the intensity of this experience.
The next 2 hours are spent fully winding down with some meditating and dancing but stomach and body pains make it hard to stay focused with an intention.
Again I question my work, what am I really learning from this? "loss of fear will only be obtained through constant surrender"

+3 hours, finally asleep
This was my bootcamp, I was put through tests of fear in hopes of gaining courage to deal with whatever comes at me in the future.
One can end up in some freaky places and all one can do is learn to surrender to the wackiness and embrace the cosmic jokes.
Maybe this isn't what was intended but this is what I've take away from it.
As the experiences continue to get more intense, I know we collectively grow stronger as each of us individually grow stronger.

This is our call to arms. Never fear and learn to surrender to the experience, remembering we are all in this together.
Sometimes things just won't make sense, and maybe shouldn't make sense,
but it is only through these experiences that we will come to understand our true nature.
Never give up, but always surrender!
 
mattimus said:
What do you guys personally do to maintain your intentions throughout the entire experience?
Click to expand...


I think much of this is simply allowing your body to become familiar with the experience. Our physiology has evolved to associate these altered states--where the mind spins and spins--with poison. we need to re-train the body so it knows "this is okay...." this may only happen through direct experience.

ALSO, if you're looking for a mental trick, use specific images rather than vague intentions. Personally, to ground myself during intense moments of body load I like to use the image of Jodie Foster falling through the wormhole in CONTACT: view it as a ride too someplace amazing! This image provides both context and intention so the body understands what's going on (and calms down) and the mind may then explore.


It is our necessary choice to provide an image of intention for every second of the experience.

keep us posted!
 
.
.
As I have mentioned before, the first step I take into the other place always seems to be filled with whatever negativity I may be carrying around. This last year with spice has done much to unblock my psychic growth(mental, not telepathic), but I still always run into some frightful creatures.

Last night my first deep toke was met with the usual buzzing and pixelation of my surroundings and all seemed soft and fuzzy. Then, I closed my eyes. I decided to let the universal-bliss-love cascade over and through me. My CEV's were typical RGB pixels folding in n-dimensions and then, a tiny 'corner' of one of them tore open and I saw an eye set in a skeleton eye-socket and part of an exposed jaw bone. "I SEE-ee youuu...". And I thought, damn, this again.

The morphing visuals continued and more and more tears revealed several more skeleton entities much like Tim Burtons "Mars Attacks" martians only bone white. They make such evil and menacing faces at me while they twist and contort themselves into impossible positions. They appear to be squeezing themselves into a 'bungee-cord-net' material and the stuff appears too tight around them. This contortion continues as I try to wait it out. I finally just open my eyes.

This was not a fear inducing scenario. It is simply disturbing in that I feel I am unwelcome in their region. I almost ALWAYS have to pass through this 'gauntlet' to get to the centering, loving, universal acceptance area of hyperspace.

Usually it is a reminder that I have been negative in some way in my life. However, since I know this and HS has become such an integral part of spiritual life, I simply do not engage in negativity anymore.

I don't drink(not that drinking is negative, just how I drank was), I no longer smoke cigarettes(cannabis maybe twice a year, if that), I have become a vegetarian(just over a month), my anger issues are leveling out and I truly try to see everything through others' eyes.

All so I can 'pass the test' when I go in.

Needless to say, I continued forth and found my bliss. I went deeper than I have been in a LONG time and came out renewed, refreshed. Touched by the source, I feel I am armoured and ready to tackle the REAL enemy in all of this...my ego.



I can offer one piece of advice, if you are new to spice and see these 'ugly' or 'evil' entities, do not be frightened. They cannot harm you. All they can do is make ugly faces and try to distract you from moving forth. It is only a test and after a year of spicing, I still have to remind myself of that fact once in a while.


Namaste,

Espiridion
 
Back
Top Bottom