Wow! I'm having some difficulty typing. I just had the strangest unique un spice like voyage I have ever had. I loaded up 35mg of spice in my bong. To be more specific, it was a parsley spice sandwhich.
I have been dealing with some anxiety the past few times during my pre voyage prep.
As I was measuring and preparing I was telling myself that the fear would not be an obstacle today and that if the blastoff was tough, just love.
I normally have about five minutes of relaxation going over my intentions. Today about 30 seconds into it, something in the back of my mind said that it was time. I slowly heated the cone and slowly applied more flame and soon it was done. I cleared the chamber and tensed up expecting to hear the ringing and and feel the turbulance of liftoff. It didnt happen.
Then I thought, I must of had a mis-fire? Maybe, one in fifty time I vape I do something wrong and it just doesnt work out? I was still holding in the smoke and it just didnt feel the same. After about 20-30 seconds, I exhaled and there was some sparkling and fuzzyness, but no fractals and light. I closed my eyes and I remember explaining in my mind to someone that I was very new at this. They very sharply reminded me that I had in fact done it many times before. I opened my eyes, everything in front of me smoothly folded or rolled forward like the wheels on a slot machine, it was a different view! A very different view!
Normally my spice voyages are very vibrant, almost chaotic, lots of color- pinks and purple and day glo greens. There is alway frame stacking and changing fractals. Sometimes I interpret this as angry or scary, out of control. Not very welcoming. I believe that this is what caused allot of the anxiety and fear I have had in the past.
Today was a breath of fresh air, a different view. The folding of the fabric continued all around me and through me. Everything had a very satin finish to it with lots of dark greens and tans and browns, nice friendly smooth motion. I remember telling myself. I remember hearing myself say- I'm never going to do this again. I was immediately reminded by someone of all the work, research, and planning I had done to get where I was now. I wasn't scared, I definately was gone. Dead? Then I started hearing all sorts of voices spitting out clinical data about me. None of it scared or startled me. The voices sounded like those steril matter of fact, emotionless voices you hear in a hospital over the intercom when a doctor is being paged.
Everything around me was industrial like, big pillars and walls that were ever folding back into the fabric and then brought back down from above me to assume the landscape around me only long enough for me to notice it, then it would fold right back into the fabric of existence once again.
It dawned on me that I was somewhere that I couldnt return from. That didnt seem to bother me. I could still hear the voices, though I could not make out what they were saying. They were brodcasting factual data about me and data about DMT and what DMT was. It sounded as though they were reciting info about me that one would find in an operators manual. The info they were brodcasting about DMT sounded like it was being read off wikipedia, all very steril and clinical.
As I started to become grounded. I heard them talking about me being almost done, it was as though I was being prepared for discharge or return? As I just started to be able to make out the room I was in and what was going on, I thought I was going to sit up and a very clinical sounding mans voice said " hold on partner your not all the way done yet" and then a womans voice started reciting info about DMT dosages and how long voyages last and instructions for grounding onself after a voyage. When I tried to sit up and was told to hold on I sensed or felt or I understood that I was attached still to where I came from. My body was attached at several points head to toe by umbilicals.
I agreed with the voice and told myself to relax. I slowly came back into focus.
This experince was nothing like any DMT voyage I have ever had. The come up and the grounding happened very slow. The colors and theme were very earthtone industrial. It was a much more smooth fluid experience.
This experience reminded me quite a bit of Salvia experiences that I have had in the past. In fact, if I had had that experience on salvia I may not have questioned it much.
This was a motivating awesome experience for me. This voyage was an introduction to me, for me, and about me. I wish I could understand it. Wow!
I have been dealing with some anxiety the past few times during my pre voyage prep.
As I was measuring and preparing I was telling myself that the fear would not be an obstacle today and that if the blastoff was tough, just love.
I normally have about five minutes of relaxation going over my intentions. Today about 30 seconds into it, something in the back of my mind said that it was time. I slowly heated the cone and slowly applied more flame and soon it was done. I cleared the chamber and tensed up expecting to hear the ringing and and feel the turbulance of liftoff. It didnt happen.
Then I thought, I must of had a mis-fire? Maybe, one in fifty time I vape I do something wrong and it just doesnt work out? I was still holding in the smoke and it just didnt feel the same. After about 20-30 seconds, I exhaled and there was some sparkling and fuzzyness, but no fractals and light. I closed my eyes and I remember explaining in my mind to someone that I was very new at this. They very sharply reminded me that I had in fact done it many times before. I opened my eyes, everything in front of me smoothly folded or rolled forward like the wheels on a slot machine, it was a different view! A very different view!
Normally my spice voyages are very vibrant, almost chaotic, lots of color- pinks and purple and day glo greens. There is alway frame stacking and changing fractals. Sometimes I interpret this as angry or scary, out of control. Not very welcoming. I believe that this is what caused allot of the anxiety and fear I have had in the past.
Today was a breath of fresh air, a different view. The folding of the fabric continued all around me and through me. Everything had a very satin finish to it with lots of dark greens and tans and browns, nice friendly smooth motion. I remember telling myself. I remember hearing myself say- I'm never going to do this again. I was immediately reminded by someone of all the work, research, and planning I had done to get where I was now. I wasn't scared, I definately was gone. Dead? Then I started hearing all sorts of voices spitting out clinical data about me. None of it scared or startled me. The voices sounded like those steril matter of fact, emotionless voices you hear in a hospital over the intercom when a doctor is being paged.
Everything around me was industrial like, big pillars and walls that were ever folding back into the fabric and then brought back down from above me to assume the landscape around me only long enough for me to notice it, then it would fold right back into the fabric of existence once again.
It dawned on me that I was somewhere that I couldnt return from. That didnt seem to bother me. I could still hear the voices, though I could not make out what they were saying. They were brodcasting factual data about me and data about DMT and what DMT was. It sounded as though they were reciting info about me that one would find in an operators manual. The info they were brodcasting about DMT sounded like it was being read off wikipedia, all very steril and clinical.
As I started to become grounded. I heard them talking about me being almost done, it was as though I was being prepared for discharge or return? As I just started to be able to make out the room I was in and what was going on, I thought I was going to sit up and a very clinical sounding mans voice said " hold on partner your not all the way done yet" and then a womans voice started reciting info about DMT dosages and how long voyages last and instructions for grounding onself after a voyage. When I tried to sit up and was told to hold on I sensed or felt or I understood that I was attached still to where I came from. My body was attached at several points head to toe by umbilicals.
I agreed with the voice and told myself to relax. I slowly came back into focus.
This experince was nothing like any DMT voyage I have ever had. The come up and the grounding happened very slow. The colors and theme were very earthtone industrial. It was a much more smooth fluid experience.
This experience reminded me quite a bit of Salvia experiences that I have had in the past. In fact, if I had had that experience on salvia I may not have questioned it much.
This was a motivating awesome experience for me. This voyage was an introduction to me, for me, and about me. I wish I could understand it. Wow!
