A Pleasure To Be Here

[SingularFusion]

Hello everyone, I am new around here and have been a little intimidated by the whole introduction essay thing until now. Sadly I have never yet experienced DMT, although I recently extracted a little, I have been unable to muster the courage for it thus far. I am taking some fairly hefty Panaeolus species in high dosage and things like that pretty regularly, but even so, the large looming spectre of DMT causes me some sort of anxiety which will have to be overcome. Initially the anxiety was around obtaining source material but now my anxiety extends to the product itself. I wonder if I am somehow not ready for this, and all of this is some sort of sign, although I am not usually prone to those kind of beliefs. My friend even gave me a fairly cheap recycler rig so I could dab the fb properly, and then the gods somehow intervened and I lost it on the train ride home, my mind was obviously away dreaming somewhere and I simply set it down at a pause in the journey and never picked it up again. Tell me that is not a sign!! I am not prone to losing stuff normally

Mostly when I am not working I enjoy gardening and cultivating things. Mostly cannabis, mushrooms, veggies, cacti and some other ornamentals to try to keep the place beautiful. I live a simple life with a few dogs and a small bit of land I rent which I have took an oath to slowly improve. Nothing fancy really, but it is home. Alongside all that, I am always trying to learn relevant skill sets that fit into that cultivation lifestyle. In this life I hope to avoid interference from the State as much as possible, work a humbly-paid job that will never amount to much, and keep my head down, towing the line

Except when I am in the dark here with you guys. Then I can live free, amongst others who can appreciate the diversity of the human condition, and understand that we do not all fit easily into the variety of acceptable moulds that society has presented to be chosen from

Here beyond the event horizon, in the technicolour darkness where their light does not shine, I am safe from their meddling ways

I hope to learn many things here beyond the excellence of what I have already read, and one day contribute something useful to the discussion from the practical experience I have gained in the meantime, so that someone could benefit from my future knowledge tomorrow, the way I have benefited from yours today

Thank you all contributors, from the bottom of my heart, for the wealth of wisdom that has been provided here

All the best,
SingularFusion

P.S: I will surely let you all know how it goes once I muster up the courage/curiosity overwhelms trepidation. I am excited but finding the right moment has been hard

 

[Nydex]

Welcome, great to have you here with us! I completely understand your anxiety regarding spice. I have it as well. I've tried it a few times and I always had a peculiar, unsettling experience. I tried it in FB, as changa, as Aya, and every time it seemed to me I was just not ready to work with the spice yet, and so I listened and put my machine elf pursuit on a hold for now.

I know the spice will call my name when I'm ready, so I'm not worried of missing out or anything. It's understandable to be intimidated by the utterly ineffable, it's even expected. Don't put yourself down for it or think less of yourself for lacking the courage. When the time is right, you'll know it.

And in the meantime, enjoy the beautiful thing that the Nexus was and has become!

 

[DexterMTripp]

Welcome @SingularFusion !
Reading your story is like reading mine in a lot of ways.
The difference I think is that I read 'The Spirit Molecule' book (I think there is an audio book too on YouTube).
That calmed me a lot. I also, took time to make my own, and buy all of the tools necessary to do it the best way I thought I could with the least amount of waste. I'm the person that needs to know everything about something before I do it, and I have to play the movie in my head of me doing it and all the steps 400 times before I actually execute.

Ultimately, *don't* do it, until you have settled that you are ready to do it. There is no rush. The experience is profound and you really want to be in a nice calm mindset, among friends (although I've only run solo), and maybe a nice calm drone or music in your ears. I like music because I know this is 15 minutes max, and if things go wrong I only need to wait out the songs.

The last trip I took I was listening to Billie Eilish 'No time to die', and it was AWESOME!!! Nothing but warmth, and love, and happiness all over (with a little bit of "am I dead?" in the back of my head).Afterwards, I also kind of felt like I was seeing something I shouldn't be yet.
I tear up a little just hearing the song again it was so good.

That was on 1/25 and I've been in a really good mood since then.

So really, there is no rush. Take your time. We'll be here when you get back to hear your amazing hyperspace story, if you decide to take it, and if you never decide to do it, that's OK too.

 

[Panpsychic]

Thanks for being very forthright in sharing how you feel, and I can relate fully to this. Don't rush into it, it will still be there next week, next month, next year or whenever you feel ready.

I can say that the sacrament is something that really there is no fully preparing for as there is really nothing quite like it. You can ease into it to an extent by reading, watching and listening to material about it of course but that can only help so much. I thought that, being a fairly experienced LSD and mushroom user at relatively high doses, that it couldn't be that different or unexpected psychedelic wise...I was wrong.

I tend to look at it in terms of the state of consciousness that it facilitates. The DMT state of consciousness is simply at a higher Dimension of power than other psychedelics like shrooms or acid. Even at relatively low doses this can be felt, yet at the same time to me it always feels right...righteous even. Like it's supposed to be this way. Its not easy though at times and you need to be clear as to why you are doing it.

Just keep working on yourself and when the time is right you can partake.

 

[Pandora]

SingularFusion,

Welcome to the Nexus. I am very glad you signed up and enjoyed your introduction. I resonate with your desire to live your life and keep out of the eyesight of Big Brother. The powers that be seem set on a program of greed, self-centeredness and environmental destruction. They have so much concentrated wealth and power there is little we can do.

This world desperately NEEDS feminine nurturance and is not receiving and will not receive it.

Also the vicissitudes of life are hard. With these realities, I find I have given up on the news and politics and leaned into family and the found family of Nexus.

Your situation sounds wonderful. It may not last forever, but it sounds great for right now. Please be sure to take time to enjoy it.

As far as DMT fear goes, it is completely understandable. It attacks the ego, offers the ultimate unknown in terms of experience and is extremely intense. Having said that, it is really worth it. You found the materials, you extracted your own DMT. DMT is one of the safest drugs on the planet. You are on your way.

Did you invest in a good mg scale? This is very important. You may also want to buy an amber vial or two to store your DMT in the freezer.

Which brings me to my next point - there is NO rush. Take your time. Wait until the time is right or your curiosity is overwhelming. The DMT will be there for you.

Finally, I encourage you to start with a low dose, just to put your toes in the water so to speak. Maybe like 10 mgs. Be ready for the body load. It feels heavy, sometimes a bit anaesthetizing, it distances us first from our body sense then at high doses from our ego/sense of self. Try not to worry about breath or heartbeat. The body will take care of those things whether you are aware of them or not. Trust it. It has done this for you every time you have fallen asleep. Why not when you are in DMT trance?

Embrace and work on letting go and surrender. These are the keys to positive DMT experience. The drug is extremely strong so it's going to be in charge. Let it. It will show you astonishing things.

I am glad you signed up even if now is not the right time. I hope you will enjoy our little found family and want to participate. Again, I warmly welcome you.