A short tale of Deadpan

[Deadpan]

Hi friends,

I have finally found myself registering for an account after frequently finding answers to my questions contained here on DMT Nexus - also because of my latest experience of DMT which I want to talk about.

Without going into an experience report, for as long as I can remember, I've had existential issues. These issues aren't persistent but come in little bursts, they seem to attack me even though it's almost always my fault that I ended up in the trap in the first place.

What I am talking about is, when my thoughts begin exploring existence and "being" forever - being conscious, I fall into a panic, a torture like a concentrated depression.

I think this is the biggest factor that drew me to DMT and by god did it elevate what I am talking about. I'll come to write about my experience but for the life of me, I don't know if it was a "bad trip" or what was inevitable. It was my fear that I thought couldn't get worse.

Regardless, happy to be here because if any group of people could have the understanding I do, I'm gonna find it here.

PS: It was my second experience with DMT (and the heaviest dose).

 

[Spiralout]

Glad to have you here :thumb_up:

I believe I've been dealing with a similar "feeling" on and off for the past few years. I could try to describe it in detail (and have, and probably a bit too often and long windedly sometimes) but to put it succinctly it's almost a feeling of "unreality" or as if thing's (my perception, reality and life itself) are about to "flip" over on themselves .. As if I am about to realize I am dreaming.

There are plenty of people to talk to here and I"m certain you'll have some interesting conversations ( even if you don't find "the answer" .... or the "SEKRET" (Shhhhh)