Absolution (First Entity Contact)

[TGO]

HOLY COW! :shock: :shock: :shock:

Last night, I was not only powerfully hyper-slapped, but I met my first entity. I have never been so humbled in my entire life... It seems to me like this entity has been hanging around every single one of my journeys, waiting for the right moment to communicate with me. Perhaps it is some sort of spirit guide? At least that is how I am beginning to integrate it.

The memory is a bit fuzzy. It started with three massive rips of changa out of my 10 inch water bong. The next thing I know, I see impossible dimensions falling out of the sky and surrounding me. Like large pieces of 4, 5, and 6 dimensional glass came crashing down and distorted everything to the point where my bedroom was no longer recognizable.

I fell back onto my bed and tried my best to wrap myself up in my blanket and closed my eyes. This is where I first saw the entity. It was a masculine form of energy. Dark and extremely potent. He was perched in the upper left portion of my field of vision...waiting. As the room melted and I closed my eyes, he literally swooped in from above (flying) and...I was taken...

If I were to describe what the entity looked like, I would say that he slightly resembled Zangetsu, the humanoid form of Ichigo's sword from the wonderful animated series, BLEACH except he was a much larger form. Dark tattered robes of black and white energy and unsmiling, unflinching characteristics. This entity was not malicious... I think...But it was incredibly stern, almost in a parental sort of way. Very strange and a bit unnerving.

As he swooped down my entire perception changed to only black and white. I was completely and utterly enveloped in the entity and his energy. The entity said nothing but I got the feeling that I was being given no choice. I must go with him and see. I must see...

This is where things get a bit fuzzier. The overwhelming energy that I was engulfed in was taking me somewhere. All this time the energy felt very familiar, like I had been in contact before but indirectly or something. I was shown a series of events, all of which felt very real. My reality was completely replaced. It was absolute. At this point in time, I cannot clearly remember it all but it was downright terrifying, I know that much. Once again, it was completely absolute in its power to show me things...

I had had a couple of drinks (beer) before journeying and I am pretty sure one of the lessons was, "HEY MCFLY, QUIT ALL THE DAMN DRINKING!" :shock:

I make jokes to cope with the seriousness of it all. I drink beer on a pretty regular basis but by no means do I get plastered all of the time. I used to do that and it started destroying my life piece by piece. Therefore, I stay away from all hard liquor and just enjoy beer a few times a week...

Anyway, I can't really recall much after that. There were several more scenarios that I was shown by this entity but the memory is fleeting. Like a dream, it just slips out of your memory. But this was the most powerful journey I have had so far. If my other breakthroughs were a 4 than this was a 6, at least (on a scale of 1-5 )!

When I came back, it was like being reborn! I took a huge breath and struggled to sit up. The world around me was still very distorted and funny looking. I was then overcome with an immense emotional breakdown of sorts. I wasn't sad or mad or happy...I was just so very GRATEFUL to have come back. Then I wept. I cried in the loving arms of my girlfriend for at least 10 minutes as I tried to explain to her what had just happened. It felt as though I was atoning for something. Like I was cleaned of all negative energy. It was so terrifying and overwhelmingly beautiful at the same time. I am very happy to have had this experience. I feel very cleansed and uplifted today. Anyway...

This wasn't just a trip. This was absolution.

Thanks for reading

Humbly Yours,

-The Grateful One-

EDIT:

(The picture below is of Zangetsu which is close to what my entity looked like. Put this image through the Google AI dreams software, or whatever it is called, and it would come pretty close...)

 

[Doc Buxin]

Holy guacamole Grateful!!!!

That's one hell of a journey...

I find it funny, & perhaps you can too at this moment having some hindsight on the whole trip, that even the most intense, terrifying spice journeys can create an overwhelming sense of gratefulness, gratitude & love inside of us afterwards.

I don't know (of course), but I find it fascinating.

Thanks for sharing!

Take care my friend.8)

 

[TGO]

Oh, most definitely! In retrospect, I feel like I have been eternally humbled.
During last night, it was like all my preconceived notions of what is and what could be had been dissolved, along with my ego... I have had more than a handful of DMT breakthroughs but never a face to face encounter with an entity. This was me ----->>>>> :shock:

:lol:

Words are failing me at the moment! It was beautiful!

 

[drfaust]

Thanks so much Grateful. I am touched by that.

I have suffered heart rending states of cosmic anguish in which irreconcilable extremes were given to me to experience in one moment. I have been humbled, yes. Sometimes, in fact, I literally get on my knees.

Your experience reminds me now, however, of the time I sat for one of my most thoughtful friends as he imbibed as much 5Meo-DMT as he could take in in a lungful. He was quiet for the first few minutes and then he lay on his side and started weeping. He later said a finger of what he felt to be the most awesome and terrifying Angel came down and touched him ever so gently and he was torn apart by it, obliterated, his heart torn open by a ruthless divinity.

The experience seemed a result of his relationship with that wholly otherness which many others perhaps will never experience in quite that way, or with such tenderness.

I'm also reminded of what my Lady just said, "It is our ability to be moved and affected by our experience that will in turn affect others."

I felt affected by your story.

 

[TGO]

No, thank you for your response! I am glad my experience was able to move you. It sure moved me. I feel new and whole again and I couldn't ask for anything greater than that...

 

[Jees]

I love the tune of your posts in general Grateful One, and this one in particular.

It gives hope in a way, or it has at least that effect on me reading the OP.
We're so wrapped up with our fear that hope must look for a chance to transfix it.
And when it does ...
:shock:

Thank you brother for sharing, I which I could hug you, as a matter of fact I think that just happened

 

[TGO]

*welcomes and receives hug*

Thank you Jees, that is very kind of you to say!

 

[dreamer042]

I was curious, so I went ahead and put that image through deep dream to see what would come of it.

 

[TGO]

^^^ Wow, that is eerie! Thanks for that dreamer! Of course, it is impossible to completely and accurately depict what was seen but this is a step in the right direction, that is for sure!

Thanks again!

:thumb_up:

 

[TGO]

I was doing some thinking about this experience and that feeling of being "taken" seems to me comparable to what it might feel like to get struck by lightning (without the potential deadliness of course) while simultaneously traveling through a portal into hyperspace. This was a bit different because I was guided through the portal by the entity rather than traveling through on my own. This experience felt catered to me. Sometimes a good slap is all one needs to pay attention! :d

It was comparable in the way as to how much energy I could feel all around me. Pure energy, pulsating and vibrating and making its way through every atom of my being. Bright and thick, white and black were the color schemes of this energy.

Perhaps this is the feeling we get when a consciousness shift is felt and in turn we are transformed into a form that we can traverse hyperspace with (Like a DMT hyperspace suit). Like we need to be converted into a different format before entering the vastness that is hyperspace...?

I don't really know, I am just speculating and spouting out ideas...but that is enough for now I suppose!

 

[Jees]

...I was guided through the portal by the entity rather than traveling through on my own...

It was exactly this part that lead me to

It gives hope in a way, or it has at least that effect on me reading the OP.

It read as you were really cared for. And the more stern it came across, the more powerful your assistance actually was. (Speculating)

 

[TGO]

...I was guided through the portal by the entity rather than traveling through on my own...

It was exactly this part that lead me to

It gives hope in a way, or it has at least that effect on me reading the OP.

It read as you were really cared for. And the more stern it came across, the more powerful your assistance actually was. (Speculating)

Speculation or not, that makes a lot of sense. It was clearly giving me what I needed rather than what I was expecting or wanted. I didn't even realize that I had "expectations" going into it, interestingly enough.

At the time, it felt quite like a nightmare in its ability to be completely overwhelming. But I chalk that up to giving into being awestruck...not to mention, it was my first time even ever fully meeting an entity. I was even beginning to think that I might never see an entity (which I was fine with...whatever happens, happens is what I like to believe... )! I have read about them and my girlfriend has seen some but any and all preconceived notions of what they were or what they do (or even what they may look like) was completely new and foreign to me. That alone was earth shattering.

 

[TGO]

Update:

Since this journey I have not gone back into the DMT realm. It is not because I am fearful. I mean, I am fearful but it is out of respect rather than being scared because it might be scary, if you get what I am trying to say... (it is late and my work schedule has been flip flopped so I am tired... )

I've also just settled into my new home and am still getting used to it. I always get a little nervous before administering DMT in a new location.

My girlfriend and I may be taking an AYA (Edit: Pharma, not traditional Aya) journey tomorrow if all goes well but we will see...

 

[tseuq]

After my first N,N-DMT breakthrough I took a break of almost 4 month, because I felt so full of information and in respect of this experience. I still went on some intense (also solo high dose) journies with mushrooms, cacti and LSD but I didn't feel like doing DMT now. Then in one night, suddenly the idea of vaporizing DMT crossed my mind. I just did it, knowing that this is a "right" moment, and hit hyperspace again.

I do not force myself to vaporize because I know that I am coming back anyways. I trust myself to "know" when to go for a breakthrough, like I unexpectantly did the last two nights.

Listening to myself ("I have to vaporise because.." which is like a command from my ego vs. "I want/do it now." from my own feeling/intuition) works pretty well for me.

I wish you safe travels my friend!

tseuq

 

[TGO]

I hear you, the call has not been as strong lately...more like a twinge...I've just been waiting for the right moment to go back. I don't know when that will be but I'm listening and waiting. There was never a need to force it and I understand that a little better now...The call of Aya (pharma, actually) is much closer and it has been a minute since I've traversed that sort of space...

And thank you tseuq, you always have inspiring words! 8)

 

[TGO]

Listening to myself ("I have to vaporise because.." which is like a command from my ego vs. "I want/do it now." from my own feeling/intuition) works pretty well for me.

Just wanted to second this. I too feel that way.

Grateful One, I liked your write-up!
I like your idea of consciousness having to be transmuted into a different form so that it can travel through hyperspace -
the hyperspace suit. I like it. Makes me think of consciousness in a different way.

May the force be with you :d

Thanks! It is an interesting theory and is probably why people call DMT "The Key" ... Perhaps hyperspace is always around us and we are just not always as in tune with it. Take a little DMT and see what is really there...?

Who knows? I like to speculate and consider all possibilities!

May the force be with all of us!

 

[DMT_Tom]

Last night, I was not only powerfully hyper-slapped, but I met my first entity. I have never been so humbled in my entire life... It seems to me like this entity has been hanging around every single one of my journeys, waiting for the right moment to communicate with me. Perhaps it is some sort of spirit guide? At least that is how I am beginning to integrate it.

I am in disbelief. This is word for word what happened to me and I feel the same way, word for word, about meeting my first entity last night.

This is where I first saw the entity. It was a masculine form of energy. Dark and extremely potent.

Indeed? Mine was also masculine, yet feline. He was playful and happy to see me, incredibly intelligent and could easily read my entire soul. He pounced on me with tough love and we made eye contact that I am still thinking about right now.

This entity was not malicious... I think...But it was incredibly stern, almost in a parental sort of way. Very strange and a bit unnerving.

haha it's amazing how during the processing phase, we both came to realize the moods and personalities of our spirit companions. My Joker entity was not malicious either. I got a sense that he was young, though.. very young and immature for a hyperspace being yet still incredibly wiser than me. He delivered the message I needed in the way that a cat would playfully fight with its companion (yes, painful biting and scratching are involved).

It felt as though I was atoning for something.

Same here, good grief man. They made me think that I was deserving so much punishment. They made me feel ashamed of myself. They showed me a very evil side of myself! But later on, those feelings were taken away and I re-framed the guilt trip they had laid on me as a positive experience that was extremely well-planned for me individually.

Great experience report that I could relate to quite a lot

 

[TGO]

Last night, I was not only powerfully hyper-slapped, but I met my first entity. I have never been so humbled in my entire life... It seems to me like this entity has been hanging around every single one of my journeys, waiting for the right moment to communicate with me. Perhaps it is some sort of spirit guide? At least that is how I am beginning to integrate it.

I am in disbelief. This is word for word what happened to me and I feel the same way, word for word, about meeting my first entity last night.

This is where I first saw the entity. It was a masculine form of energy. Dark and extremely potent.

Indeed? Mine was also masculine, yet feline. He was playful and happy to see me, incredibly intelligent and could easily read my entire soul. He pounced on me with tough love and we made eye contact that I am still thinking about right now.

This entity was not malicious... I think...But it was incredibly stern, almost in a parental sort of way. Very strange and a bit unnerving.

haha it's amazing how during the processing phase, we both came to realize the moods and personalities of our spirit companions. My Joker entity was not malicious either. I got a sense that he was young, though.. very young and immature for a hyperspace being yet still incredibly wiser than me. He delivered the message I needed in the way that a cat would playfully fight with its companion (yes, painful biting and scratching are involved).

It felt as though I was atoning for something.

Same here, good grief man. They made me think that I was deserving so much punishment. They made me feel ashamed of myself. They showed me a very evil side of myself! But later on, those feelings were taken away and I re-framed the guilt trip they had laid on me as a positive experience that was extremely well-planned for me individually.

Great experience report that I could relate to quite a lot

Thanks!

It is a bit strange that experiences from one person to another can be so vastly different and yet the same, no? :d

When this happened, I felt just like you mentioned in your HyperSlap post...I've learned a great deal since then. DMT boggles my mind constantly, whether I'm partaking in it or not. DMT is the definition of "food for thought" as it skewers reality and leaves us in awe. I've seen many forms of the phrase, "Do not give in to astonishment" but that is much easier said than done.

Another interesting observation about breakthroughs is that they tend to top themselves. I had plenty of what I had considered breakthroughs before this event but this one was...well different...and MUCH stronger.

As for the entities, I've still only met the one mentioned here. Their sense of intelligence is indeed incredible, it sure does make it seem like they may not be a part of us. Completely separate and independent. The way that they can show you everything/nothing about the deepest innermost workings of "self" and the strange intricacies of hyperspace. Please don't get me wrong though, I am merely speculating. I have no idea what to really think about all of this. All I know is that it was the single most powerful experience I've ever had in my life (except for maybe one where I was in a car crash when my crazy ex pulled the wheel and tried to kill us...but that is a whole different story and it had nothing to do with psychedelics...:d )

But as others and even you have said, a break is probably in order...but to each their own. I feel like DMT has a mind of its own. It definitely knows when to give us silly humans a good ol' hyperslap.

 

[Jees]

...They showed me a very evil side of myself!...

In my hyperslap it was not an entity (or sorts of) that led me to same insight.
Something about my true self (personal and very beyond personal) became clear and I could not believe it, I was sad and disappointed to have found out actually. I got to know the reason for my own and the cosmos existence (which came down to the same altogether), what drives it, and I found it utterly perverse. Divinity only existed to give breath to it's counterpart, that kind of stuff.

It must be like 2 years back but still integrating that event. It's message could not be put into perspective all the time. It cannot be solved or mediated or put aside, it can only be embraced and I still feel reluctance for that. The having no choice feels beholden.

Everything I saw in life later was nothing short from confirming the ugly message given. I now feel why people do things better than their selves, I understand why things go south, the real motor behind it, always one and the same source radiating into different spin offs.
I still feel that force in myself acting, even sometimes I comply being part of it, but now being aware of the pattern's blueprint instead of being blindfolded for it. That makes a difference already.

It shuffled my priorities and became a firm well for setting out a course in my life, and that is something I missed out on in my life before. Now it feels like yes it must be embraced (no escape on that part) but then it does not end there, aha. After the embrace there is room for letting it go, or simply making it able to let it run away from me on it's own legs (not due my disagreement), or post-embrace transformation potential of the perverse energy. I feel myself sliding on that course and never had a better and cleaner motivation compass for setting out a principal heading.

So it ended up being a huge lever for the better, but man, pffff, the suffering it takes...
Those being free of it are those having seen it closest in the eye.

 

[drfaust]

Now it feels like yes it must be embraced (no escape on that part) but then it does not end there, aha. After the embrace there is room for letting it go, or simply making it able to let it run away from me on it's own legs (not due my disagreement), or post-embrace transformation potential of the perverse energy. I feel myself sliding on that course and never had a better and cleaner motivation compass for setting out a principal heading.

So it ended up being a huge lever for the better, but man, pffff, the suffering it takes...
Those being free of it are those having seen it closest in the eye.

I really like this Jees. And I think I get what you were saying about "grief" and the "difficult" one whole that is always two-sided and yet one whole at the same instantaneous paradoxical moment.

It is one thing to come to an intellectual understanding of paradox. And that is a good thing.

It is wholly another to be directly confronted at the depths of one's being with the paradoxes of existence. And to suffer that directly? To bear the unbearable?

Maybe spirals are a way to conceive of the cycling back and forth between release and freedom and being beholden and the suffering of existence?

I keep coming back to what seemed to be too much for me at another time, and what was felt to be unbearable suffering becomes bearable and is even felt as grace or what Ram Dass calls "fierce grace."

I just got back from the mountains and a solo trip of wandering, meditating, and cold water entry.
So much cold water! So much grief!

I suffer the cold water, and then in another moment, there is so much joy. And I can't get enough of it. I keep going back to the cold water.

It's still painful. It's freaking freezing water. But, somehow my relationship to it is richer than it was. It is also joy and bliss and the blessings of more life.

Like you said. In the Tao, there is no end.