the smiling eyes
Rising Star
On Friday night my girlfriend and I took some MDMA. We were celebrating my newly extracted batch of DMT and decided to spend the night at home listening to music and taking flight. My first several trips were beautiful and colourful and stimulating like I had expected them to be, but I think I got careless and tempted fate.
On my last journey of the night, as the MDMA was wearing off I took several monster hits of dmt from my bong. Instead of the coloured geometric shapes and hyperspace environments that I came to expect, something totally new happened. This is a tough one to explain but I'll do my best.
The first thing I noticed was that the room remained the same, only I could not see the whole room. Each spot I would look at appeared to be a multiplication of itself as if I was looking through the eyes of a fly. The image would rotate in a circular or triangular fashion but always to the left. I began to regress.
I was flooded with this overwhelming feeling of family like I was connected to my girlfriend and to my friend who sat on the other side of me. I was utterly confused. I kept hearing the phrase "we're all here!" "we're all here!" I later learned it was me who was saying it.
I looked to my right and Sara was wrapped in a blanket and looked like a small child and immediately I felt as though I was surrounded by small children. I could not see them but I could sense them. It was like we were one big first grade class trip to the other side. I began to lose myself to the unity I was feeling and I was convinced that everyone around had slipped into this demented reality and were all seeing and feeling the same thing I was. Whatever "I" there was left anyway.
Time started to disapear and I started to fear I would not come back. "Something's wrong" my friend would later tell me I said. Eventually reality started to come back and I slowly regained my individuality. It was the most confusing, amazing, terrifying dislocation of reality I have ever experienced. I've been thinking about it obsessively since. I havn't touched the spice again since though, I'm a little intimidated so I'm allowing myself a little time to pyschologically recover.
It was the strangest thing to ever happen to me.
On my last journey of the night, as the MDMA was wearing off I took several monster hits of dmt from my bong. Instead of the coloured geometric shapes and hyperspace environments that I came to expect, something totally new happened. This is a tough one to explain but I'll do my best.
The first thing I noticed was that the room remained the same, only I could not see the whole room. Each spot I would look at appeared to be a multiplication of itself as if I was looking through the eyes of a fly. The image would rotate in a circular or triangular fashion but always to the left. I began to regress.
I was flooded with this overwhelming feeling of family like I was connected to my girlfriend and to my friend who sat on the other side of me. I was utterly confused. I kept hearing the phrase "we're all here!" "we're all here!" I later learned it was me who was saying it.
I looked to my right and Sara was wrapped in a blanket and looked like a small child and immediately I felt as though I was surrounded by small children. I could not see them but I could sense them. It was like we were one big first grade class trip to the other side. I began to lose myself to the unity I was feeling and I was convinced that everyone around had slipped into this demented reality and were all seeing and feeling the same thing I was. Whatever "I" there was left anyway.
Time started to disapear and I started to fear I would not come back. "Something's wrong" my friend would later tell me I said. Eventually reality started to come back and I slowly regained my individuality. It was the most confusing, amazing, terrifying dislocation of reality I have ever experienced. I've been thinking about it obsessively since. I havn't touched the spice again since though, I'm a little intimidated so I'm allowing myself a little time to pyschologically recover.
It was the strangest thing to ever happen to me.