I know exactly what you mean. I choose willfully not to react like everyone does. It's a conscious, daily effort. A good, small scale example is being in a crowded, but quiet and safe room when a door opens. What happens? The normal reaction is to look at whatever created a change in the external environment, in this case the door. But if I hear the door open, I can assume it's going to be a person opening the door. Who opens it is usually arbitrary, so why bother to waste time to look at a person coming into a room?

I have faced adversity that has caused me to be depressed, suicidal, and just done with life. I've leapt over these adversities through introspection and psychedelic use.