This might be way off topic, but have you ever played with yourself on DMT? Wo momma. Not only does it not feel like your hand, but it doesn't really feel like a hand at all. It's like handjobs-by-Jesus. By play with yourself i mean stroking your stallion, slappin' pappy, shucking bubba, cuffing the puppy, calling down for more mayo, clubbing the baby seal between your legs, cranking the fat, doodling your noodle, slapping the cyclops, hand-to-gland combat, jazz yourself, jiggle your jewelry, tickle your elmo, wrestling Mr. Chubs, pound your flounder.....or if you're a girl: beat the beaver, buff the weasel, checking for squirrels (?!), digging a trench, fanning the fur, feeding the bearded clam, flickin' the bean, Genital Stimulation via Phalangetic Motion, the great gristle rub, playing the Clitar, soaking the whisker biscuit, strumming the banjo, tickling the taco, or just plain Jillin' off. Trust me, take a good hit, and just go to town...you won't be disappointed. Though now i have to be careful around bright colors, and geometric patterns when in public (a good fractal gives me a hard-on like you wouldn't believe!).