aethereon
Esteemed member
Hi, I have done ayahuasca ... DIY before, a handful of times. It worked out about twice, the other two times I burned my brew. They say if you're not in the right space, or ready for it, it won't let you partake, or have an effect. I just chalked it up to that. A few years has gone by and I've been wanting more of a shift than just what changa/dmt sessions could offer (actually, I've felt much less 'effect' the last times I journeyed with those.)
All of this is sort of besides the point, I've already booked myself in for a two night retreat at a local center. I thought I did my due diligence and researched the retreat center, everything seemed good. However somehow I missed some articles saying a few years ago, the shaman apparently was accused of sexual assault with a woman during a ceremony. It's him and his wife and some other people) that run the ceremonies at their house. From what I gather, this didn't happen at their house but at a different location in our area. I saw on reddit someone chimed in and said that this guy... during the ceremony was comforting them, who then fell asleep and apparently so did he ... 'spooning them.'
Immediately this seems like a giant, huge red flag and my initial thoughts were to 'cancel' before the opportunity to cancel runs out. But ... maybe it's just wishful or magical thinking of mine, I can't help but think that this could be just a 'ploy' to ruin the reputation of these people. The retreat center seems lovely from what I can tell. All the other reviews I ever found seem genuine and real. I even seem to have some mutual friends on facebook with this guy. But of course this stuff is illegal here basically, and honestly, i have a hard time fully trusting the system, police, judges, the government here etc. I don't think it would be out of the realm of possibility this was all done just to steer people away from the medicine/the retreat center. I've known some inside stories of just how corrupt things can be and how backwards things are and the lengths people will go to for particular agendas.
I'm wishing to go ahead with the ceremony in a couple weeks, but thought i might ask for some advice. Of course, breaking this trust in a ceremony setting is a HUGE breach of trust and bound to bring issues and harm to both the shaman as well as the other party. And this is even with fully consenting people (I am going partly off the advice of Iván Chocrón, a youtuber who has several videos on the subject) let alone actual sexual assaults done in a ceremony setting! And not like I am worried the guy would 'try' something on me either. But that is also beyond the point.
I never could find that the guy was actually found guilty, only charged, so everything is "alleged." And not to deny women who say they have been sexually assaulted or anything, but other than a couple short articles posted around that time, there is literally ZERO information about this, there are no other red flags that I can see so to speak. I really wish to undergo the ceremony, feeling trepidation only because it's a big undertaking, not so much because of what I have read. But also, I don't want to support some sort of "unscrupulous people." Come to think of it, I saw also a post saying that their retreat center/home had caught mysteriously caught fire a while back, causing a few hundred thousand dollars worth of damage. Maybe that's another red flag? It wasn't during a ceremony or anything but still is this karma, accident or sabotage?
Regardless, just not sure how to proceed. Do I just sweep this under the carpet and go ahead with it? Do I contact them directly and ask what this is about? Do I try and look up legal records and trust that the due process and justice was served in court? Do I go to my mutual friends online and ask them for a sort of 'character reference check?' Should I just cancel outright, knowing that my opportunity for 'the medicine' would be put, at least temporarily out of reach (i.e. having to travel to a different country, currently and in the short foreseeable future out of reach for me.) Any feedback would be appreciated, hope this makes sense... thank you very much
Edit: it could have been because i was browsing their website, probably is but a minute after posting this I got an email from them asking if I have any questions... probably this is the correct way to proceed, if you hear rumors about someone, it's best to ask directly.
All of this is sort of besides the point, I've already booked myself in for a two night retreat at a local center. I thought I did my due diligence and researched the retreat center, everything seemed good. However somehow I missed some articles saying a few years ago, the shaman apparently was accused of sexual assault with a woman during a ceremony. It's him and his wife and some other people) that run the ceremonies at their house. From what I gather, this didn't happen at their house but at a different location in our area. I saw on reddit someone chimed in and said that this guy... during the ceremony was comforting them, who then fell asleep and apparently so did he ... 'spooning them.'
Immediately this seems like a giant, huge red flag and my initial thoughts were to 'cancel' before the opportunity to cancel runs out. But ... maybe it's just wishful or magical thinking of mine, I can't help but think that this could be just a 'ploy' to ruin the reputation of these people. The retreat center seems lovely from what I can tell. All the other reviews I ever found seem genuine and real. I even seem to have some mutual friends on facebook with this guy. But of course this stuff is illegal here basically, and honestly, i have a hard time fully trusting the system, police, judges, the government here etc. I don't think it would be out of the realm of possibility this was all done just to steer people away from the medicine/the retreat center. I've known some inside stories of just how corrupt things can be and how backwards things are and the lengths people will go to for particular agendas.
I'm wishing to go ahead with the ceremony in a couple weeks, but thought i might ask for some advice. Of course, breaking this trust in a ceremony setting is a HUGE breach of trust and bound to bring issues and harm to both the shaman as well as the other party. And this is even with fully consenting people (I am going partly off the advice of Iván Chocrón, a youtuber who has several videos on the subject) let alone actual sexual assaults done in a ceremony setting! And not like I am worried the guy would 'try' something on me either. But that is also beyond the point.
I never could find that the guy was actually found guilty, only charged, so everything is "alleged." And not to deny women who say they have been sexually assaulted or anything, but other than a couple short articles posted around that time, there is literally ZERO information about this, there are no other red flags that I can see so to speak. I really wish to undergo the ceremony, feeling trepidation only because it's a big undertaking, not so much because of what I have read. But also, I don't want to support some sort of "unscrupulous people." Come to think of it, I saw also a post saying that their retreat center/home had caught mysteriously caught fire a while back, causing a few hundred thousand dollars worth of damage. Maybe that's another red flag? It wasn't during a ceremony or anything but still is this karma, accident or sabotage?
Regardless, just not sure how to proceed. Do I just sweep this under the carpet and go ahead with it? Do I contact them directly and ask what this is about? Do I try and look up legal records and trust that the due process and justice was served in court? Do I go to my mutual friends online and ask them for a sort of 'character reference check?' Should I just cancel outright, knowing that my opportunity for 'the medicine' would be put, at least temporarily out of reach (i.e. having to travel to a different country, currently and in the short foreseeable future out of reach for me.) Any feedback would be appreciated, hope this makes sense... thank you very much
Edit: it could have been because i was browsing their website, probably is but a minute after posting this I got an email from them asking if I have any questions... probably this is the correct way to proceed, if you hear rumors about someone, it's best to ask directly.
