Morphing Interstices
What is real anyway?
Well, hardly one of my 'first' steps in hyperspace! But it appears that I am still barred from posting on the rest of the forum, so here I am posting a trip report on something rather intriguing that happened to me yesterday.
I made a syrian rue tea of 3.5 g. I had fasted on juice for a day and half prior to drinking the tea. I realised only later that I had in fact neglected to drink enough fluids though while fasting, and I suspect part of what I experienced may have been due to dehydration. The rue also appeared to effect me in a strange way. My partner took and did the same and had a great time. But he maybe drank more water than me while fasting. I think I may also have taked too much rue, perhaps my tiny form meaning I only need a rather smaller dose...
So here is how it went - my first ever 'dark' dmt trip - literally no light, very deep browns and greens and swamp like feeling....
As soon as the rue kicked in I felt an unbelievable lassitude. Extreme lethargy, but relaxed and happy, as if I had been sedated. The rue did not make me nauseous to drink, I sipped if slowly over 40 minutes and found no nausea in the half hour that followed.
I took my first dmt smoke (about 40mg freebase in a double chamber bong) around 40 minutes after drinking the rue tea. This first smoke was awesome, spectacular like always, orgasmic bliss states of body-mind rapture, and I met the goddess there whom I always see. She showed me landscapes of great beauty and magic and I kept saying 'yes I agree' and she would laugh and say, 'i know you agree, just enjoy the bliss'. The trip lasted longer that usual from the MAOI, But unlike my previous trips, at the end of this one, I felt as if my own rational mind triumphed, as if the voice of me saying 'yes but I know that already' was the last thing I heard. This felt oddly disappointing and felt somber after the trip and still intensely lethargic from the rue.
I recall thinking that maybe I had hit a juncture with the dmt and I now needed some more confronting experience with as I had become to complacent with the bliss states it has always given me. I wondered then, 'do i need a dark dmt trip?' But I dismissed this as a silly thought and attributed the disappointed feeling I carried from the trip to my intense fatigue on the rue.
My partner and I decided to take some LSD as well since we both felt that the experiment in potentiating the dmt with the rue had only been partially successful, extending our trips, but not giving us much once they were over.
I think it was some time after that I began to feel dehydrated. The lassitude seemed to be increasing, I could barely get up off the bed. My partner was way perkier and had his second smoke and encouraged me to take another one while the LDS was beginning to kick in. I drank a little water first, thinking I really did need to get my fluids up. And then about 10 minutes later I had my next smoke.
All went well to begin with. Smoked the whole lot in one lungful, held it a long time and felt the usual beginning with fractal, sparkling, molecular breakdown of my visual field. But no sooner had it begun than it took an alarming turn. The intense high frequency vibrating, ringing sound that had started the trip suddenly descended rapidly down a sliding scale to very deep rumble and all the colour and light lowered with it, as if someone had dimmed all the lights. I felt like I was in a dark vortex and suddenly was aware of my body and the strong nausea that was overtaking me. I don't remember exactly what happened for the next few minutes, i know I tried to stay in the bedroom and that partner tried to humour and calm me as I writhed painfully and struggled not to vomit. Finally I got the strength to get up and get to the bathroom, figuring i was better off not being too far away from it. I crouched on the floor between the bath and the loo and tried not be sick as I feared I might keep vomiting for a long time if I did (that has happened to me before and various drugs when I have over done it and I know I am better off if don't go there...)
The hardest thing was even as I felt incredible nausea, I also could barely hold myself up such was the fatigue I felt. My partner came in with cushions, put these in the bath and suggested I lie down in the bath.
I lay there for the next hour in a dark dark place....It seemed as if the bathroom was a kind of swamp, everything looked dark and slimy (it is not in reality very dirty but it looked it to my tripping mind). The nausea was intense and came in waves of severity. At its worst it was overwhelming and sucked my entire consciousness into that dark vortex feeling, and made me feel as if I was been churned around in a washing machine, unable to control of assimilate anything, and not having a very good time either...
Finally the nausea subsided enough for me to drink some water, and that seemed to help it subside more. Then my partner brought me some home-made rehydration fluid (4 teaspoons of sugar with half a teaspoon of salt in a litre of water) and after drinking this slowly over an hour I began to feel significantly better.
Certainly and interesting experience but not one I am inclined to repeat. The lessons I draw from it are 1. drink lots when fasting, 2. less rue for tiny girls, 3. trust my intuition if it tells me I will be in for a dark ride if I smoke more dmt in the state I am n....
I made a syrian rue tea of 3.5 g. I had fasted on juice for a day and half prior to drinking the tea. I realised only later that I had in fact neglected to drink enough fluids though while fasting, and I suspect part of what I experienced may have been due to dehydration. The rue also appeared to effect me in a strange way. My partner took and did the same and had a great time. But he maybe drank more water than me while fasting. I think I may also have taked too much rue, perhaps my tiny form meaning I only need a rather smaller dose...
So here is how it went - my first ever 'dark' dmt trip - literally no light, very deep browns and greens and swamp like feeling....
As soon as the rue kicked in I felt an unbelievable lassitude. Extreme lethargy, but relaxed and happy, as if I had been sedated. The rue did not make me nauseous to drink, I sipped if slowly over 40 minutes and found no nausea in the half hour that followed.
I took my first dmt smoke (about 40mg freebase in a double chamber bong) around 40 minutes after drinking the rue tea. This first smoke was awesome, spectacular like always, orgasmic bliss states of body-mind rapture, and I met the goddess there whom I always see. She showed me landscapes of great beauty and magic and I kept saying 'yes I agree' and she would laugh and say, 'i know you agree, just enjoy the bliss'. The trip lasted longer that usual from the MAOI, But unlike my previous trips, at the end of this one, I felt as if my own rational mind triumphed, as if the voice of me saying 'yes but I know that already' was the last thing I heard. This felt oddly disappointing and felt somber after the trip and still intensely lethargic from the rue.
I recall thinking that maybe I had hit a juncture with the dmt and I now needed some more confronting experience with as I had become to complacent with the bliss states it has always given me. I wondered then, 'do i need a dark dmt trip?' But I dismissed this as a silly thought and attributed the disappointed feeling I carried from the trip to my intense fatigue on the rue.
My partner and I decided to take some LSD as well since we both felt that the experiment in potentiating the dmt with the rue had only been partially successful, extending our trips, but not giving us much once they were over.
I think it was some time after that I began to feel dehydrated. The lassitude seemed to be increasing, I could barely get up off the bed. My partner was way perkier and had his second smoke and encouraged me to take another one while the LDS was beginning to kick in. I drank a little water first, thinking I really did need to get my fluids up. And then about 10 minutes later I had my next smoke.
All went well to begin with. Smoked the whole lot in one lungful, held it a long time and felt the usual beginning with fractal, sparkling, molecular breakdown of my visual field. But no sooner had it begun than it took an alarming turn. The intense high frequency vibrating, ringing sound that had started the trip suddenly descended rapidly down a sliding scale to very deep rumble and all the colour and light lowered with it, as if someone had dimmed all the lights. I felt like I was in a dark vortex and suddenly was aware of my body and the strong nausea that was overtaking me. I don't remember exactly what happened for the next few minutes, i know I tried to stay in the bedroom and that partner tried to humour and calm me as I writhed painfully and struggled not to vomit. Finally I got the strength to get up and get to the bathroom, figuring i was better off not being too far away from it. I crouched on the floor between the bath and the loo and tried not be sick as I feared I might keep vomiting for a long time if I did (that has happened to me before and various drugs when I have over done it and I know I am better off if don't go there...)
The hardest thing was even as I felt incredible nausea, I also could barely hold myself up such was the fatigue I felt. My partner came in with cushions, put these in the bath and suggested I lie down in the bath.
I lay there for the next hour in a dark dark place....It seemed as if the bathroom was a kind of swamp, everything looked dark and slimy (it is not in reality very dirty but it looked it to my tripping mind). The nausea was intense and came in waves of severity. At its worst it was overwhelming and sucked my entire consciousness into that dark vortex feeling, and made me feel as if I was been churned around in a washing machine, unable to control of assimilate anything, and not having a very good time either...
Finally the nausea subsided enough for me to drink some water, and that seemed to help it subside more. Then my partner brought me some home-made rehydration fluid (4 teaspoons of sugar with half a teaspoon of salt in a litre of water) and after drinking this slowly over an hour I began to feel significantly better.
Certainly and interesting experience but not one I am inclined to repeat. The lessons I draw from it are 1. drink lots when fasting, 2. less rue for tiny girls, 3. trust my intuition if it tells me I will be in for a dark ride if I smoke more dmt in the state I am n....
