Hello avedadaise,

Welcome to the Nexus.  Thank you so much for sharing that very well written Introduction Essay.  I very much enjoyed reading that.  You sound so very insightful. 

I don't mean to sound patronizing but I feel like saying, "Give it time."  Keep making an effort and the social skills may come.  You may be "faking it" during the work schedule, but you can always come home and "be yourself."  Many of us have had to play similar "games" to maintain a career over time.

I think in this day and age no one need be a lone wolf unless one desires to.  With the amazing connectedness we experience with the internet we can find communities that meet our needs.  Nexus need only be one.  .  Modernity is such a trip - never have so many felt so isolated while being so connected.

Okay, I encourage you to take a good look around.  Check all those links at the top of the forum pages such as wiki and Health & Safety.  And please be sure to check all the subfora - they are so packed with well-researched information.  I'm sure you will like what you find.

Again, welcome to the Nexus.