Dimitris final lesson

[Achilles]

So I think I’m done with dmt. I love psychedelics. They have literally changed my life but every time I’ve tried to use dmt it’s been way to powerful for me to withstand... I’ve tripped a ton of times and love the visuals and great feelings given but prior to dmt my psychedelics of choice were shrooms and lsd. Neither of which come close to DMTs power. I’ve been trying to find the nice medium to make dmt more like lsd by trying oral administration but it’s to much. Last night made my rue tee and swallowed about a dime sized pile of dmt... I felt a little spacey but got tired and fell asleep. It could have kicked in when I was sleeping but idk. So I woke up this morning at 6 and was disappointed I fell asleep. I made some more rue tea, shot it down and ate about the same amount or maybe a little more(it looked like anywhere from 15mgs to 30mgs)... I took it all down at nine and expected it to take a couple hours to fully kick in. About an hour and ten minutes in it was coming on HARD, and I knew it was just the beginning. I tried telling myself it’s all good just breathe and don’t think negative. Too late, I was terrified of what was coming and it was coming much faster and stronger than I thought it would. As I tried to calm myself down the room was shifting shifting shifting into the buzzing slanted restlessness. I kept trying to keep myself from laying down and trancing out, I knew the focus given would only intensify it. But it was really trying to knock me out... fear wasn’t even the issue. The issue was that I could feel my thoughts becoming infinite. Thinking so deeply while focusing on nothing/everything... words were losing meaning. I was fading and I quickly decided this was to much but didn’t know what to do. No appetite to try to eat to calm it down plus I didn’t even know what to eat that wouldn’t react badly. Water wasn’t helping i just felt like it was dissolveing it quicker in my belly. I reluctantly went and woke my wife up who i knew wasn’t gonna be happy with what I’d done this morning. I calmly told her I was having a hard time and needed her to calm me. She did good but all the back rubbing and telling me it was gonna be ok wasn’t stopping it. I laid with her fighting the trance and urge to shut my eyes. Once again this was all only in an hour and a half, I knew I couldn’t ride this for 6 more hours especially because it was only intensifying as every minute progressed. I decided to get in the shower to hopefully wake me up and keep me from fading away. It wasn’t helping... so I finally threw the Hail Mary. I shoved my finger down my throat and Induced vomiting... I threw up a lot and was met with great relief when I looked down and saw the tea bag of freebase I ingested laying in the shower drain. At this point I was relieved... I knew now I was headed the other direction back to normal. As always either my voice or dimitris voice was in my head the whole time. When I initially decided I didn’t want to go any further the voice in the trance(mine or the drugs,idk...) told me it was ok. Though things weren’t going good it was like the trip was encouraging me to not be ashamed to back out. The voice was trying to calm me The whole time. Telling me to wash my hands of dmt but it was ok. I was a child of psychedelics and didn’t have to prove it by continuing. I greatly appreciated this. So all in all that was what I took away. I’ll stick to lsd and cannabis but some people are only meant to go so far. I’m a psychonaut and a nexian to the bone but me and dimitri can’t seem to hit it off... I’m sorry for the huge post but this was a huge experience for me and tbh this was the short version. I love all of you and all of the community so much and I’ll forever stand aligned with psychedelics magic but I’ve found my stopping point. I can’t take DMTs power lol. Thank anyone who reads this and hopefully it helps another find clarification when they need it the most.... I love you guys


Learn, share, expand

 

[burnt]

I found its fine to take a break for dmt and not think about it really for few years and then come back to it if your interested. It also is important to realize different people can have much different sensitivities to the drug. Sometimes its helpful to just take low doses if you enjoy them. If you find it impossible to enjoy and don't want to use it all then by all means don't. But if you have desire but just find it overwhelming, take less.

 

[Achilles]

If I try again in the future I’m vaping... I can’t be there for hours.. tbh i think it’s honestly just to powerful for me. It doesn’t just show me things and make me think like mushrooms or lsd. It’s like it completely engulfs you. It’s like you become aware of the existence of everything in a way that is so much to comprehend that it completely breaks me. Feeling all of existence at once completely breaks me down to the point you feel like everything is this infinite trap that can’t be escaped... I almost feel like I know the feeling of immortality and how scary it is... endlessness makes you almost pray for nothingness just because infinity is so vast, powerful, and alien... definitely think I just need to tone it down and integrate for a while... it’s ok though... I felt it all and I accept that I just can’t fathom it and to try to explore it is just to much. I can’t comprehend it all but i think I learned what I needed to and that’s enough... I just really hope these feelings don’t cause anxiety or anything when I go back to lsd.. that’s a real concern for me

 

[twitchy]

There's a mountain my wife and I visit often here in western NC. The location is very remote, and it is a truly magical place with bears running around like dogs and flying squirrels having fully recovered from the brink of extinction scurry through the tree tops at night. At the very top of this mountain, at an elevation of around 6000 feet is the most incredible view of the surrounding forests and peaks that is just awe inspiring. The hike to get up to the ridgeline is a literal killer though, and after the last hike I took to get there, I realized that I just couldn't do it anymore. I know that I will likely never see that place again, but as much as I love that incredible place, I'm ok with not going back. I've seen it, I've enjoyed it, I've loved it and learned from it, but I know it would be far too much for me to handle anymore. As I pass into old age, I leave it now for others to find, explore, and cherish. Knowing your own limits is the foundation of humility, the only virtue that truly matters.

 

[Achilles]

There's a mountain my wife and I visit often here in western NC. The location is very remote, and it is a truly magical place with bears running around like dogs and flying squirrels having fully recovered from the brink of extinction scurry through the tree tops at night. At the very top of this mountain, at an elevation of around 6000 feet is the most incredible view of the surrounding forests and peaks that is just awe inspiring. The hike to get up to the ridgeline is a literal killer though, and after the last hike I took to get there, I realized that I just couldn't do it anymore. I know that I will likely never see that place again, but as much as I love that incredible place, I'm ok with not going back. I've seen it, I've enjoyed it, I've loved it and learned from it, but I know it would be far too much for me to handle anymore. As I pass into old age, I leave it now for others to find, explore, and cherish. Knowing your own limits is the foundation of humility, the only virtue that truly matters.

That’s a sad story my man .... id carry you back up that mountain if i knew you in real life. To me the nexus is the elite league of mountain climbers and dmt is the mountain that no matter how hard I tried to scale like the rest of my brothers I just kept loosing footing and sliding back down. It’s definitely a pride hitter to me. I’m trying not to think of it like that though. Everything happens for a reason. Maybe there was a snake gonna get me on that mountain and the universe simply wouldn’t let that happen.. idk. I think im gonna return to the mountain im familiar with for a while. Maybe that mountains just not in the cards for me right now

 

[FranLover]

You did it wrong :| You shouldnt take it two times in such a short time frame, and shouldnt then do it right after waking up xD one probably wasnt in the mood for dmt and couldnt grasp what a dmt trip would mean, probably wanted to get faded, but dmt implies so much more than the pleasent fadedness. Should never be underestimated, taken without purity of intent. I dont doubt your purity of intent, but rather think anyone would be pressed to find it and find strenght in it having just woken up and dosed some hours prior.

Anyway you dont need dmt for the moment and youll be fine :thumb_up: life is long, there are many streams...Reading can be just as fun, engaging, and educational--done in the right spirit, even looking at a leaf can unlock divine knowledge.

 

[Achilles]

You did it wrong :| You shouldnt take it two times in such a short time frame, and shouldnt then do it right after waking up xD one probably wasnt in the mood for dmt and couldnt grasp what a dmt trip would mean, probably wanted to get faded, but dmt implies so much more than the pleasent fadedness. Should never be underestimated, taken without purity of intent. I dont doubt your purity of intent, but rather think anyone would be pressed to find it and find strenght in it having just woken up and dosed some hours prior.

Anyway you dont need dmt for the moment and youll be fine :thumb_up: life is long, there are many streams...Reading can be just as fun, engaging, and educational--done in the right spirit, even looking at a leaf can unlock divine knowledge.

The short time frame probably had a lot to do with how quickly it took effect. As far as just waking up I was wired lol I work a lot so sleeping past 6 even on the weekend is impossible for me. I wanted to take it early so I could have a nice day trip at my house, unfortunately that’s not how it went down ... your definitely right about the intent part. I was looking more for a light day trip but tbh as of right now idk if dmt can offer that. It would have really helped If i had a dang scale and could accurately dose instead of looking up pics of dmt on scales and trying to eyeball 20-25mgs which I thought was a light oral dose.... definitely wasn’t light. I might just be looking for the wrong thing though. Is there any way to take dmt and it make you feel just awake and aware like on a few blotter tabs? Or is the hardcore trance lost in thought feeling just kind of inevitable. Don’t get me wrong, I can get lost staring at the ceiling on lsd but I can snap out of it and play a video game or talk to people and be fine whenever I want. I’m starting to feel like dmt is just a little to strong for that unless I’m just doing something wrong(which I suppose I kinda did).

 

[FranLover]

We are talking about the strongest hallucinogen in the world. It isnt for easy riding, never will be--it dictates the terms, maybe it will give you an easy ride, maybe not. Even if your taking slow tokes off a changa pipe, your always right on the verge of...

One always has to be ready to be utterly disturbed and shocked, least one risk the possibility of regretting one's imprudence later. If you want dmt to be awake, you have not understood dmt; the whole point is that it will make you sit down and tune out for at least 10mins =)

Thats why harmalas are so important to me; they make me extra sleepy and dreamy so that I dont want to be awake anymore, so that I want nothing of the world anymore, but to go into that dream...and enjoy relaxation, serenity, and divine knowledge

 

[Achilles]

We are talking about the strongest hallucinogen in the world. It isnt for easy riding, never will be--it dictates the terms, maybe it will give you an easy ride, maybe not. Even if your taking slow tokes off a changa pipe, your always right on the verge of...

One always has to be ready to be utterly disturbed and shocked, least one risk the possibility of regretting one's imprudence later. If you want dmt to be awake, you have not understood dmt; the whole point is that it will make you sit down and tune out for at least 10mins =)

Thats why harmalas are so important to me; they make me extra sleepy and dreamy so that I dont want to be awake anymore, so that I want nothing of the world anymore, but to go into that dream...and enjoy relaxation, serenity, and divine knowledge

Thanks for the advice Fran I definitely expected the trance based of my previous experiences but I think I may have dosed a bit light heartedly which led to the fear of uncertainty and being overwhelmed. Even though my experience was difficult I’ve thought about it and I’m not gonna walk away quite yet. I am gonna give myself some time though to try to forget how intense things got. I fear going back to quickly will cause anxiety towards the experience and history will repeat. Hopefully some time will help me shake off the heeby Jeebys from this last difficult experience and get me back in the zone... just a few days has helped a lot so that’s good :thumb_up:

 

[twitchy]

Try an oral administration next time, a brew is like a ski lift to the top instead of a rocket engine and if brewed correctly, is plenty potent. There's no rules saying you have to smoke pure essence and you can separate a couple doses out to get as far as you need to go with the option of going further if you need to. :thumb_up:

 

[Achilles]

Try an oral administration next time, a brew is like a ski lift to the top instead of a rocket engine and if brewed correctly, is plenty potent. There's no rules saying you have to smoke pure essence and you can separate a couple doses out to get as far as you need to go with the option of going further if you need to. :thumb_up:

It was an oral roa lol

 

[twitchy]

Try an oral administration next time, a brew is like a ski lift to the top instead of a rocket engine and if brewed correctly, is plenty potent. There's no rules saying you have to smoke pure essence and you can separate a couple doses out to get as far as you need to go with the option of going further if you need to. :thumb_up:

It was an oral roa lol

My bad.
There may still be some value to my suggestion though, separate it into two low/moderate doses and don't take the second unless absolutely needed.

 

[Achilles]

Definitely... I’m waiting to get an mg scale as well