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DMT and your family and friends

Migrated topic.
horusandswim

horusandswim

"So many questions, so few answers."
The purpose of this topic is to discuss how the people in your family and circle of friends relate to your interest in DMT. :surprised

Here, above all, the interest in the whole topic and their own attitude is meant.
Not just the smoke of a strange-smelling powder. 😉

After your first contact with DMT, you probably will not want to put the whole family on top of this "miracle drug".
But at least most of the best friends will probably tell it sooner or later.

What about a partner? How do you explain to another person who has never heard of it that the whole subject of DMT has become something special for yourself?
Not just the consumption.
To read books about it, to be interested in the story, etc.
(without acting strange)

Besides, I think that for some people there might be a risk of separating people into two categories: the one who can talk openly about the subject of DMT knowledge and the others that you just can not get so close to yourself anymore.

How does the nexus think about it?
Who in your own circle knows that you are interested in it, who would you tell or rather not? :thumb_up:

Love you people here in the nexus. 😁
 
I don't have much experience with DMT, but I can try and respond to your question with DMT replaced with ayahuasca as an analogy, even if the analogy is far from complete as there are e.g. differences in people's perception of the two due. For example, with its rich set of traditions, it's easier to portray ayahuasca as a legit medicine than it is DMT, which is more likely to bring up people's preconceptions about drugs. And the effects are different, but there are also many similarities, and finally, many things may fall under the category of "DMT"... changa for example, or oral DMT with harmalas. So I hope my post is still useful / relevant in some way.

I'm not much of a family person. I don't maintain much contact with my biological family and I don't really understand why some people do, because to me, family is random people. I didn't choose them, I don't share interests with them, so I don't see why a family member should be statistically closer to me than a randomly selected person from the 8 billion people in the world. OK, maybe the fact we were born in the same culture... but then, the fact we were at times forced to spend time together in childhood (in family gatherings etc.) acts as a deterrent, because it brings up the memories of an environment I could never make any sense of. Also, I don't like the idea that I have to engage with or owe something to people or things that are not of my own choosing, because I think it's an insult to the autonomy of the human being, which is predicated on the freedom of choice.

Friends, however, can be and are a treasure.

I'm involved in ceremonies, so nearly all of my friends are ayahuasca drinkers, and those who aren't, are spiritually inclined, because of the channels through which I meet people.

I don't have a partner and have never had one, but if I ever get one, in all likelihood she will be an ayahuasca drinker, because a partner needs to be a friend first. And probably also a facilitator, because there needs to be attraction and balance.

I might add that most of my female friends who have children, drunk ayahuasca throughout pregnancy and gave it to their children since infancy.

As for (vaped) DMT, I've only told about my encounters a couple of close friends who I thought would be the most open to it.

There are also some people in my life who I met outside of the context of ayahuasca or spirituality (some of them from decades ago) and I don't tell them about ayahuasca. And because I don't, we're not very close, because I can't talk to them about most of the things I do. And they wonder what I do, some think I do nothing.
 
This topic hits home for me.

I found psychedelics later in life, so everyone around me became less relatable once new points of view, open mindedness, fundamental presence, etc became more important to me. In my case, I have not been able to bring these important people in my life with me in this journey (yet). Aside for the positive changes in my own life, I'm hoping the research coming out helps change minds and reverses the damage caused by decades of government propaganda and prohibition.

Instead, over time I have found new and very dear friends - and the Nexus has been a part of that. I also had the incredible fortune to meet an amazing person in real life who introduced me to people I can connect with deeply. The word spiritual connection comes to mind but I'm not entirely sure what it means :) I thank the plants and fungi (nature's "internet" ) for the new very special people in my life, since in a way they brought us together.

Cheers
 
I started taking psychedelics early in life, and what I found was that there was a whole persona ready made for me to step into. Put on the cultural uniform, grow the hair out, buy some tye-dye, pick up the slang. I embraced it completely and in fullness. As such, I never had to hide it. Obvious acid-head stoner is obvious.

Rainbow-raver-burner persona in hand, when I stumbled upon DMT, I felt it was my civic duty to get every willing person who came within 50 feet of me to experience this thing. All my friends and any acquaintance that happened across me got dosed to the gills on every psychedelic possible; it was reckless, it was silly, it was probably the most magical and beautiful period of my life. All my long-term friends have taken psychedelics, but it never was the basis for the relationship. Those fair weather relationships that were rooted only in psychedelics drifted off into the ether as they are wont to do. I guess I'm fortunate that it's something I've always been able to be open about with everyone, including the people closest to me.

That was all well and good for high school and college, festival-hopping like a good middle class 20-something was not only accepted, but expected by those around me. Then we get older, responsibilities stack up, we cultivate professional lives, and start finding ourselves ever more accountable, and this is a good thing. Honestly, I find it kinda sad to come across an old burnout, replaying those same tired Grateful Dead bootlegs and never maturing beyond the cultural stereotype.

Now I'm of the mind that "those who speak do not know, and those who know do not speak." For all my know-it-all behavior on this forum, in my daily life I tend let other people bring up psychedelics in the conversation and I do my best to keep my fool mouth shut and let them educate me on the topic. I've found that it's much moar fulfilling to drop a few breadcrumbs and know that those with the fortitude for it will find their way to where they need to be, than it is to push this knowledge and these experiences on those that are not yet ready for it.

I still enjoy moderate dosing with close friends to go out dancing or around the camp fire, but over the years psychedelics have become a more and more deeply personal pursuit. The party somehow turned into a practice, debauchery morphed into discipline. I like to tell myself this bespeaks successful integration, but maybe it's just growing up.

As far as spreading the message, you can talk forever, and point to study after study after study, but before those that know you best, nothing speaks more loudly than directly seeing a positive change in the life of their loved one. A single responsible, respectful, and reliable human being is a stronger testament to the value of these substances than a million double-blind placebo controlled trials. This is the integrity of integration, the way you choose to live your life in light of the psychedelic revelation is the true exemplar of the value, or lack thereof, in pursuing this path.

Many years ago Lorenzo Hagerty of the Psychedelic Salon introduced me to the concept of "psychedelic thinking" (Episode #1). "You need not ever have taken a psychedelic to be a psychedelic thinker" he says. Being able to bring a wider, deeper, and more directly experiential perspective to problem solving is the general idea here and I think this ability to step back and take an expanded and more mindful perspective is truly the hallmark of what we can hope to gain through the use of these materials and is the target we are collectively aiming for as psychonauts in particular, and as human beings in general.

As usual, the bard put it much moar eloquently than I ever could:

Terence Mckenna said:
You are an explorer, and you represent our species, and the greatest good you can do is to bring back a new idea, because our world is endangered by the absence of good ideas. Our world is in crisis because of the absence of consciousness.
Click to expand...
TL;DR - Don't bother trying to tell people about the value of psychedelics, show them in the way you live your life every day.
 
I come from the land of emotional regression and constipation of being, tight upper lips and all that. Trying to talk to people here about DMT, psycehdelics, or anything out of the ordinary sphere of the usual cultural detritus is useless. I've tried in the past but it became clear it was more about my ego's desire for recognition or some other fulfilment, as opposed to being of actual benefit for the other party.

I apply the same philosophy now to what I know about broader topics of self-discovery for example - 'To little children you must remain silent'.

The best you can do is face the truth in conversation at the level of the person you're speaking to. Trying to do more is a fools game in my opinion. If people have the inner desire and curiosity to know more, they'll bloody well ask or seek it out. Most people do not. There is no sense in bothering them about it. Me and my best friend found DMT, and I myself more broader topics, because we were inclined in that direction and had the capacity for it.

These things will find their way into a persons life if they really want it and you can be the vehicle for that if it's on the cards. But it's not your job to force it. There is no need to play God - let reality take care of itself.

Personally I don't think DMT is that important. It's an interesting experience, but it's not the be-all-end-all, and I consider it a distraction in actuality.
 
My Dad tried shrooms a few times, got some bunk acid once, had a nice time but wasn’t too into it, more just looks at it as kind of unimportant, potentially dangerous. Mom never partook of anything, just sees it all as drugs.

Brothers tend not to love it, they’re beer and weed people. I’m just the random psychedelic sheep of the family.

I have a few friends who are big tripsters, but none use it in a disciplined way. More just something to refresh/alter perspective with for insight or rejuvenation.

I’ve concluded that disciplined, intentional psychedelic use is kind of like meditation or yoga; it’s not something easily mass marketed because it requires commitment. Occasional flirtation, like going to a yoga class or occasional meditation session may have some benefits, but at best it just gives you a different view, which you might cultivate, but this is not a profound cultivation in yogic terms.

Psychedelics are a private thing for me now. I’d rather meditate on them than have conversations on them. I’ll turn someone on if they’re interested or trip with them if they’re a good friend, but I’d be just as happy hanging out without the drug use - perhaps enjoy it even more off the drugs just because the conversation is more likely to be lucid. I definitely lost any evangelical attitude I may have had in my early years about them. Psychedelics are only yogically transformative if you bring that to them, and you’d honestly probably have a bigger shift in consciousness reading Plato or something if the goal was just perspectival experimentation rather than yogic cultivation.
 
"I've had a killer sore throat the last couple days, all ulcerated, felt tired etc, must be doing the rounds"
Friend: "You think that's from smoking DMT?" (I last smoked it 2 months ago, and even then it's occasional.)

Another time:
Got bad cramp in my foot.
Friend:"You think that's from smoking DMT?"

Got depressed recently (rare for me) over some stuff going on in my life. Discussed it with my mom and the reasons behind it.
'Phones sister and reports "He's depressed. Must be from doing DMT"

Everyone's an expert on DMT, and guess what, they didn't have to read a single word. They just know it all by magic! I only wish I had their skills.
 
Jega said:
"I've had a killer sore throat the last couple days, all ulcerated, felt tired etc, must be doing the rounds"
Friend: "You think that's from smoking DMT?" (I last smoked it 2 months ago, and even then it's occasional.)

Another time:
Got bad cramp in my foot.
Friend:"You think that's from smoking DMT?"

Got depressed recently (rare for me) over some stuff going on in my life. Discussed it with my mom and the reasons behind it.
'Phones sister and reports "He's depressed. Must be from doing DMT"

Everyone's an expert on DMT, and guess what, they didn't have to read a single word. They just know it all by magic! I only wish I had their skills.
Click to expand...

Beingin denial, typical of DMT user :p
 
Dreamer:

Your testament was so well written that I (once again) have nothing more to add to this thread. Your perspective is so close to home and so eloquently stated that I don’t feel the need to add much more.

I, too, have come through the evangelical-out spoken-cannabis farming-free psychedelics for everyone-pigeon hole-able-stoner acid head. You could spot my bare feet and dreads from 100 yards away.

I have found that allowing others to bring the topic up lets me sprinkle harm reduction and myth-busting in a more organic way and only if I feel uniquely comfortable with the company. My journeys and accompanying integration has become deeply personal. Even those who also enjoy these substances often do not share my zeal and deep connection with them.

Plus, I live a professional life filled with a 30 year tour of corporate worlds and two precious children, now.

Things change.

I still don’t wear shoes.
 
I'm really happy that this topic also seems to interest some people here. :d

With the friends who have remained over the years, I have always come out much better than with my family.
It's true, a family is a random people you did not choose.
-In an alternative society it might be normal to live with people as a family, with whom one fits together.
Dreams...

DMT is probably not the only important thing in life for most people.
But in my opinion, it affects so much, interests, your own thoughts, the feeling.
Even if it is not consumed.
Just this "awarness" about this whole thing affects you in everyday life, quite unconsciously.

Really good quote: "You need not ever have taken a psychedelic to a psychedelic thinker".

In the middle of the twenties some of the best friends are slowly moving on or setting up families. :!:
So it's time to meet at least a few people who are especially interested in such topics 😁

The only thing I find awful is this pseudo spiritual that you read again and again somewhere in the net:
"Get this email course and learn to free your clogged pineal gland". :x

DMT was never directly detected in humans in the pineal gland.
Only with rats, many do not know that.
(Probably it will be the same with humans, but with this ignorance it starts already and then one speaks of calcified pineal glands :shock: )

That some have begun to enrich themselves with people who desire spiritual experiences...
Destructive society. :sick:
 
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