joebono
Rising Star
It’s been a while since I visited hyperspace through pharmahuasca. After three intense breakthroughs via smoked spice a few weeks ago, I needed a break from the psychedelic experience. I needed time to process, package, and deal with the fact that the universe violently penetrated my skull and seared my mental landscape. Then the BBB raid struck the community and I wasn’t in the proper mindset to journey. Yesterday I ventured back with 100mg of syrian rue harmalas, 100mg of Caapi Copy, and 115mg of yellow DMT freebase.
During my three weeks of abstinence I realized that the DMT was still pulsing through me, influencing my thought processes, scratching away at reality, pulling the curtain back, and hitching a ride in my mind - all while sober. Today’s dose energized me again and unleashed the flood of wisdom that this molecule provides. I sat on the couch realizing that my life is collection of memories that I string together to form a narrative that I call my life. That is all we are – memories – our self-identity is the product of remembered and often muddled past events. I watched in awe as my mind unfolded itself to reveal a tapestry of memories and then began weaving them together and presented my life to me. My jaw dropped wide open as this wave of DMT consciousness washed over me.
Words seemed to hang in the air and swim through the living room like fish in some strange ocean. Language became a living breathing force that strived to mirror reality - it mimicked it, desperately tried to reproduce it and even created it. Words showed me their power as they displayed their ability to infect minds and convince humans of realities that don’t really exist. But then the worlds created by the spoken word really did come into being and I witnessed this birthing process.
Much of my time was spent walking around my house, muttering to myself, laughing hysterically at my ideas, wishing someone could understand what was going on in my head because it all made so much sense. Genius and insanity are connected and overlap each other and the DMT experience surfs the rough edges of both, pulling and pushing me from side to side. It will hold me down and try to drown me with wisdom one moment and then jerk me out and utterly twist my logic until I am an Einsteinian pretzel.
And here I am today just trying to pick up the beautiful pieces.
During my three weeks of abstinence I realized that the DMT was still pulsing through me, influencing my thought processes, scratching away at reality, pulling the curtain back, and hitching a ride in my mind - all while sober. Today’s dose energized me again and unleashed the flood of wisdom that this molecule provides. I sat on the couch realizing that my life is collection of memories that I string together to form a narrative that I call my life. That is all we are – memories – our self-identity is the product of remembered and often muddled past events. I watched in awe as my mind unfolded itself to reveal a tapestry of memories and then began weaving them together and presented my life to me. My jaw dropped wide open as this wave of DMT consciousness washed over me.
Words seemed to hang in the air and swim through the living room like fish in some strange ocean. Language became a living breathing force that strived to mirror reality - it mimicked it, desperately tried to reproduce it and even created it. Words showed me their power as they displayed their ability to infect minds and convince humans of realities that don’t really exist. But then the worlds created by the spoken word really did come into being and I witnessed this birthing process.
Much of my time was spent walking around my house, muttering to myself, laughing hysterically at my ideas, wishing someone could understand what was going on in my head because it all made so much sense. Genius and insanity are connected and overlap each other and the DMT experience surfs the rough edges of both, pulling and pushing me from side to side. It will hold me down and try to drown me with wisdom one moment and then jerk me out and utterly twist my logic until I am an Einsteinian pretzel.
And here I am today just trying to pick up the beautiful pieces.
