Exploring My Soul & Mind

[Soulcrusher]

First off, hello all!! I am glad that I found this place, and thankful to those who run this community. As I am hoping to become a part of the community, I will give you all a little background on myself. I am in my 20's with responsibilities. I suffer from severe IBS and from that stems massive anxiety and panic attacks.

In the 2005, my doctor prescribed me Xanax to help "calm" my stomach down, it worked wonders. However, he had me on it for far too long (this is my first week off it). I am under the supervision of another doctor who has me on a benzo taper program. Due to the chronic pain I have had some run-ins with various opiates, hydrocodone, oxycodone, OC's and Dilaudid (hydromorphone). I still sometimes take oxycodone for the chronic pain. Only last summer (yes I had never even tried a hit in college or highschool) did I discover cannabis. Since then I have been an avid user as it helps my IBS which in turn takes away my other symptoms.

I went to college for business got out with my degree, had a couple chem courses at the university level, and a handful of upper level biology courses (as these both interested me on a personal level).

Going through my Xanax withdrawals and speaking with my doctor, I have realized that something is missing, my unconscious mind has killed off a part of who I used to be (I've somehow managed to kill off my creative side and now am a 100% logical and linear thinker, this is changing though).

My interest in DMT lies within self-exploration. I believe God is inside of me and I would like to get to know my inner-self better. I also would like to spiritually use DMT (I want to explore my spirit and my mind, I'm not afraid to see what's there, I am actually too curious) to see where it takes me (I've heard many reports of it helping users with anxiety). I would like to open myself up in general and ideals, I hope DMT can be my companion. During my research, I've read DMT: The Spirit Molecule and various other writings and accounts of DMT, however, I have only recently stumbled upon this website.

All in all, I have NEVER tripped before, not even on mushrooms! I have smoked salvia and had a really odd experience, I don't really know what to make of. So I am a newbie when it comes to trip land! Any advice from anyone would be welcome!!

I am a researcher by trade pretty much, so if you ever need help locating info or something, hit me up. I love chatting with other like-minded people! To sum it up, I am going through a bit of a rough patch in my life (getting off the benzo's that my doctor gave me an addiction to) and hoping that DMT can help in shaping me into a better being in general!

-Thanks for reading this if u took the time,

Soulcrusher

 

[azrael]

Welcome to The Nexus! Please read threads, use the search function and ask questions

Bummer with the IBS, but Congratulations on transitioning off of the Xanax and opiates: your inner self has already begun to regrow itself, and will proceed naturally with time

Salvia is quite strange normally. I have found its experience to make sense only on rare occasions. It is similar to DMT in that it provides completely immersive transport to another realm (although: different realms, different feelings, different pretty much everything). That, and they both cause sigma-1 receptor activity at high enough doses

The Nexus has a great scientific community, researching publications or just finding cool info will definitely be welcome here



I would strongly encourage reading everything you can get your eyes on about these plants and chemicals
before you even think about ingesting anything!
[I don't mean to be off-putting, just emphasizing words of caution to someone new to these things]


Curiosity and patience are very helpful in working with entheogens and psychedelics. Read all you can from this forum, check out erowid.org and lycaeum.org for other information (both quite useful sites). Your being a researcher will go wonderfully with the investigation of these things, many have found that absorbing all the information they possibly can about a molecule before going anywhere near it generally reduces the potential dangers and makes the experience more comfortable and rewarding.

That all being said, nothing will quite prepare you for DMT - but it is also never a good idea to approach anything unprepared

An experienced trip sitter can be nice. It helps to have someone there to reassure you, especially if they know what you're going through. Otherwise, a really good friend can sit with you as long as both of you research what the common effects and duration are. I think there's guides for trip sitters out on the web, have your sitter-candidate read through what you can find as well as a few experience reports for the item in question.


Some people will recommend different avenues of initiation, but I think a nice and low dose of mescaline containing cactus is an excellent introduction (this is definitely just a personal opinion). It does last a long time (10-12 hours with a 1-2 day 'mental fogginess'), but the experience is generally inviting and controllable to a degree. Read the Cacti sub-forum here and check as many other sources as you can find.

Stop by the chat room after you've read up a bunch, there will probably be a few knowledgeable people in there who'll be happy to share



Welcome, Good Luck and Happy Trails 8)

 

[Elpo]

Hello to you too.

As far as suggestions go for how to start with it,i think reading is indeed very important. I really enjoyed the Cosmic Serpent. Be informed on what to expect (even though you can't really imagine it until you have done it). But another thing that i would say is very important is the dose. Doesn't matter which substance you want to experiment with, make sure you build it up gradually. This way you can discover your own body tolerance to each substance and go from there.

As for the sitter, i found it to be helpful if the sitter is on the same frequency as you are... meaning a good friend which you trust and feel comfortable with who himself is interested in these things.

The most important thing are your intentions, if those are in the right place you won't have anything to worry about.


Peace

 

[elphologist1]

Some might argue with this, but with a goal of self-exploration I don't think smoked DMT is a good first choice. Besides the intensity, which could put you off to psychedelics in general, the experience happens so quickly that self-exploration is difficult. Pharma DMT would be somewhat better, but as azrael mentions, mescaline may be better still. A low dose of LSD is good for self-analysis if you can find it, but as you may be aware "real" LSD is pretty hard to find these days and a lot what is sold as LSD is really something else.

elphologist

 

[Ayawasqero]

Be greeted.

 

[psilyguy]

Hello and welcome to the Nexus. I've heard that a daily low dose of caapi tea can really help depression (please make sure it does not effect the drugs you are taking or visa versa). Also, I know for a fact that mescaline can be very helpful in treating depression.

 

[Soulcrusher]

SWIM tried 2.5g of mushrooms last night, his first time ever. No visuals, no nothing, just laughing then a HUGE HUGE opiate buzz, SWIM had the nods like it was OC or something else. Heard this isn't normal? Def. not what I was looking for.... Thoughts on this http://www.peyoteway.org/spiritwalk.php .....?