You say you have trickster character? Try making fun of your own misery - ham it up to the extreme, push it beyond the ridiculous. Take all of these qualities over which you may find yourself agonising and twist them into diabolically ludicrous theatre.

If this idea appeals to you, how about seeking out lessons or workshops in clowning and physical theatre? You may well have some walls of earnestness that will bring surprising developments if broken down…

It bears repeating this aspect of [USER=9]@jungleheart[/USER]'s comment though - where is it you want to go? Have this in mind before any deprogramming because special perils come to those who embark on such a mission without some clear sense of what the replacement program will be.