actualfactual
Rising Star
This is the story of last night, my first breakthrough.
I loaded the large hammer style pipe up with an eyeballed dose of spice, I estimate around 60-80mg. I laid it on a bed of ashes on top of a screen, and covered with a small layer of an herbal smoking smoking blend consisting mainly of Damiana.
I held the lighter just above the bowl piece to melt the spice into the ashes/herbs. After melting it, I proceeded to touch the flame to the herbs just enough to start them burning, then removed the flame.
I managed to take 3 hits when things became extremely disoriented, I managed a forth hit before losing sense of reality.
My body broke into millions of atoms and started to pull apart. I felt a presence near me, and it was not welcoming. It seemed like he was in charge, and he was not pleased.
My body continued to rip apart. I remember become confused and scared, and was figting extremely hard to hold on to reality, I told myself to give in but I was unconciously fighting it. Fighting it was no use however, and my body completely dissipated.
I was pure energy, and I got pulled directly into the universe becoming one with it. My ego was brutally murdered and I no longer have any sense of me, or life. I am simply a part of the massive energy that is the universe. I feel a sense of negativity, like someone is dissapointed in me.
Details are foggy. After this, I begin to slowly notice my body again. I rip the headphones off I was wearing. It boggles my mind as I realized I am nothing but energy, linked directly with the universe; I realize am sweating profusely.
I look at the clock once I am back on earth, in a heavy "normal" tryptamine state. 8 minutes have passed.
I don't sleep at all the following night. I remain awake contemplating the experience and its implications. It was terrifying. It was enlightening. It was the most indescribable thing I've ever felt. It was not what I expected..there was no love. However, I am glad I was shown what I was.
Ego death is not annhilation.
It is emancipation.
You do not cease to exist.
The boundaries that define you cease to exist.
Having no boundaries, 'you' become nothing.
Yet 'nothing' is still apart of 'everything', and thus 'everything' remains.
The experience: There is no You.
The revelation: There is only you.
I am the universe.
We are the Universe.
I loaded the large hammer style pipe up with an eyeballed dose of spice, I estimate around 60-80mg. I laid it on a bed of ashes on top of a screen, and covered with a small layer of an herbal smoking smoking blend consisting mainly of Damiana.
I held the lighter just above the bowl piece to melt the spice into the ashes/herbs. After melting it, I proceeded to touch the flame to the herbs just enough to start them burning, then removed the flame.
I managed to take 3 hits when things became extremely disoriented, I managed a forth hit before losing sense of reality.
My body broke into millions of atoms and started to pull apart. I felt a presence near me, and it was not welcoming. It seemed like he was in charge, and he was not pleased.
My body continued to rip apart. I remember become confused and scared, and was figting extremely hard to hold on to reality, I told myself to give in but I was unconciously fighting it. Fighting it was no use however, and my body completely dissipated.
I was pure energy, and I got pulled directly into the universe becoming one with it. My ego was brutally murdered and I no longer have any sense of me, or life. I am simply a part of the massive energy that is the universe. I feel a sense of negativity, like someone is dissapointed in me.
Details are foggy. After this, I begin to slowly notice my body again. I rip the headphones off I was wearing. It boggles my mind as I realized I am nothing but energy, linked directly with the universe; I realize am sweating profusely.
I look at the clock once I am back on earth, in a heavy "normal" tryptamine state. 8 minutes have passed.
I don't sleep at all the following night. I remain awake contemplating the experience and its implications. It was terrifying. It was enlightening. It was the most indescribable thing I've ever felt. It was not what I expected..there was no love. However, I am glad I was shown what I was.
Ego death is not annhilation.
It is emancipation.
You do not cease to exist.
The boundaries that define you cease to exist.
Having no boundaries, 'you' become nothing.
Yet 'nothing' is still apart of 'everything', and thus 'everything' remains.
The experience: There is no You.
The revelation: There is only you.
I am the universe.
We are the Universe.
