First breakthrough - the spirit molecule

[shaman1966]

Hi all

So I had my first breakthrough a few weeks ago. I did DMT a couple of times before and got some effects (trippy patterns/colours, some dream-like hallucinations) but NOTHING like this.

Prep - 1 hr meditation.
o.o5g into the machine. light up.

I take half a breath in and things already feel way different to the first few times I tried. I feel this pressure building in my mind. I get excited - this is it!! I keep the flame going and keep drawing in the smoke. 1 puff. I start taking another puff and the room melts - I can barely see through all the patterns. Pressure building. Draw the last of the second puff.

went in for a third puff - as I was drawing in, everything felt like it was sweating. First my hands, but then my face, my chest, my scalp, my lips, my eyeballs. EVERYTHING felt like it was sweating. I felt like I was literally dissolving. Put the pipe to one side and all I can say is blast off.

Literally got shot out of my own body. It's like my consciousness was outside, but could still look around. I looked down at my own body. My first thought was: Fuck - I OD'd or something - I'm dead. Then I recalled that this is the sort of thing that happens on DMT. Kinda weird - I actually felt like I had my wits about me even though I was tripping balls.

Then I heard a crackling / ringing sound and felt like 'i' was being elevated into another dimension. I then found myself in a room with black and white tiles everywhere. A little warped, but I couldn't tell which which direction anything was. I then started telepathically talking to an orange humanoid who was the guardian. He was polite but stayed at arm's length. He wanted to work out who I was and whether I was worthy. Sort of a gate keeper I guess.

We talked for a while and then he let me in. I was warped into another dimension and came face to face with a goddess. Elephant head. human body. Female. Radiating love and kindness and warmth. I was just basking in her glory. There was no 'intellectual' side to this - it was an experience which I just accepted and surrendered to. After what felt like around 400 years, I came back.

I opened my eyes with the profound feeling that I had just had a sacred experience with a deiety. I was back in my body but the world was still a bit weird (patterns everywhere). I looked at the clock and it had been just over 10min. This was the most real thing I had experienced. I started questioning which reality was real - what I had just experienced, or what I was used to. To be honest, I still am.

Anyway - still thinking through this stuff, but WOW. Now I understand why they call it the spirit molecule.

 

[VibeSurfer]

Nice. It is the spirit molecule indeed.

For some reason I find your mentioning of the black and white checkerboard interesting. I have seen the same one or two times and every once in a blue moon I will read of someone else seeing it as well. I don't imagine there's much to read into about it but for some reason that checkerboard perplexes me...

Safe travels!

 

[Orion]

Sounds like a really good first breakthrough, welcome to hyperspace!

You wonder which reality is more real? Both are information being filtered through the same apparatus in our heads. This might be why they both feel equally real. But that doesn't mean they aren't both real. What the hell is hyperspace... ? To me it could be neither real nor unreal, it would be the most DMT-esque answer.

 

[Exitwound]

I opened my eyes with the profound feeling that I had just had a sacred experience with a deiety. I was back in my body but the world was still a bit weird (patterns everywhere). I looked at the clock and it had been just over 10min. This was the most real thing I had experienced. I started questioning which reality was real - what I had just experienced, or what I was used to. To be honest, I still am.

Anyway - still thinking through this stuff, but WOW. Now I understand why they call it the spirit molecule.

Sounds like a strong and meaningfull experience, the one that will change you life
You probably will need help integrating it, don't hesitate to ask questions and share your findings. It helps tremendously to talk to people, who also experienced the Divine Moment of Truth

Also kudos for using the machine - when used properly it's an amazing device!

 

[shaman1966]

Thanks for the incredible support everyone!

For some reason I find your mentioning of the black and white checkerboard interesting. I have seen the same one or two times and every once in a blue moon I will read of someone else seeing it as well.

This is cool but freaky too. I've read that hallucinations are generally quite different person to person in, for example, schizophrenic patients - there might be 'archetypal themes' but they're still usually different. Interesting thing about DMT is that, based on what i've read, people keep telling a very similar set of stories. To me, this supports the 'realer than real' feeling - that we're not hallucinating - we're actually in another dimension or something, as we all see the same thing. I mean - that's why we tend to believe in this reality - because when I pick up a pen, others perceive the same thing.

Regarding the checkerboard, I think it is a gateway to determine where you go. It's about judgment. That's why its black and white. Thats why the pattern is a regular shape (square) with straight edges (you fall in or out). I also feel like that's why there's no 'direction' in that room - the room is the line between the squares. Anyway - pure speculation of course.

To me it could be neither real nor unreal, it would be the most DMT-esque answer.

This is a really cool thought. Reminds me of my last mushroom trip where I was also transported to another dimension but could perceive this dimension in a different way. It was like space and time were organised as star constellations and each star was a point in space-time that I could 'zoom-in' to. In that trip the shrooms told me that all of space-time is finite and already existing (ie. the future is made) and we are there to simply witness it.

So I guess what i'm saying is that asking 'what is real' is asking the wrong question. It's like a circle drawn on a piece of paper whether the square drawn next to it is real. The circle is no more real than the square, but can only 'perceive' 2-dimensional space. So the circle is real and the square is real, but so is everything that the circle and square cannot perceive.

Trippy thoughts.

Sounds like a strong and meaningfull experience, the one that will change you life Smile
You probably will need help integrating it, don't hesitate to ask questions and share your findings. It helps tremendously to talk to people, who also experienced the Divine Moment of Truth Smile

Also kudos for using the machine - when used properly it's an amazing device!

Thanks! What do you think the checkerboard room is? Have you seen anything like the goddess? Do you think it's real? What do you think it means?

Regarding the machine, I failed many times before I succeeded. Takes a bit of getting used to - getting the flame, size of steel wool, distance, breathing tecnique etc down. Well worth it though!!

 

[forwardtoinfinity]

The checkerboard pattern and room with deity is a quite familiar experience. Most walls and the floor were the black/white checkerboard, and one wall seemed to be some sort of swirling portal that I did not enter at the time. I believed this to be the waiting room.

The checkerboard type pattern itself is heavily prevalent in most visions - it is typically warped to give some sort of 3D landscape feel to it. Best way to describe it would be a globe filled lines lines of longitude/latitude, where you know they actually intersect at 90deg but visually it doesn't measure that way from the current angle.

The post trip feelings of vitality and safety/security in the future are so real, and I hope that the glimpse into the light (smoalking) is indeed real, but I tend to err on the side of hallucination being as accurate as vision, in that it doesn't necessarily convey something real.

Sure, there's a chance Earth was seeded with hyperdimensional substances that connect us to a higher/primal intelligence, but also as great a chance this is all once colossal cosmic accident. It's just a box of rain, believe it if you need it, or leave it if you dare.

Tripping, like life, I find to be a self-fulfilling prophecy. Go into a trip with bad set/setting, get bad results. Go into it with desires to be improved and the attitude to accept the teachings, and there's a good chance you'll come out with positive feelings ready to conquer lifes challenges.

 

[Jozeh]

Sounds like a great first breakthrough, you must be approaching this venture with the correct mindset. Some great points on the checkerboard, its symbolism has always interested me and is seen in buildings throughout history.

Without discussing the freemasonry symbolism or if it is actually an intended symbol or just a leftover. I do think the discussion of it holds its own in this context:

"The Floor, or groundwork of the Lodge, a chequer-work
of black and white squares, denotes the dual quality of
everything connected with terrestrial life and the physical
groundwork of human nature – the mortal body and its
appetites and affections."

"“The checkerboard floor upon which the modern
Freemasonic lodge stands is the old tracing board of the
Dionysiac (Greek) Architects, and while the modern
organization is no longer limited to workmen’s guilds it
still preserves its symbols."

The Mosaic Pavement

“The web of our life is of a mingled yarn, good and ill together: our virtues would be proud, if our faults whipped them not; and our crimes would despair, if they were not cherished by our virtues.”
― William Shakespeare, All's Well That Ends Well"

So far for the subjective, the objective experience of the checkerboard hallucinations could be down to the overloading of neural structures that are usually gated at a different frequency that allows contrast detection and on those structures our detection of movement is based.

Maybe it is in moving across the checkerboard floor, mastering order from the chaos, you are able to transcend to the altar where the ceremony is carried out. so dimensional travel etc

I wonder if you could radioisotope(?) trace the DMT molecule to see it hitting these neural structures of contrast detection before reaching more complex structures in the brain taking you deeper into yourself. Akin to the crossing the floor and to the altar.

Similar to the cause of the cathartic purge of aya/pharma being caused by:

The vomiting in particular comes from its action on the area postrema, the part of the brainstem that controls that urge to throw up. In this brain region, ayahuasca acts on 5HT3 serotonin receptors

Sorry I can't find a paper here is a Vice article, don't shoot the messenger, focus on the message, not the medium, I'll dig for one

As Above so Below.

 

[Exitwound]

Thanks! What do you think the checkerboard room is? Have you seen anything like the goddess? Do you think it's real? What do you think it means?

Regarding the machine, I failed many times before I succeeded. Takes a bit of getting used to - getting the flame, size of steel wool, distance, breathing tecnique etc down. Well worth it though!!

Don't expect to get any instant meaning of such experiences. It is the language our meat brains take a lot of time to proceess sometimes, a symbolic non-dualistic language of higher levels of consciousness.

Strongest experiences take a while to make something of, to integrate, sometimes years.

Regarding reality of experience - I am most certain this is not the ultimate reality we are living in and what you have seen is just a peek at what the wider picture is.

 

[shaman1966]

"“The checkerboard floor upon which the modern
Freemasonic lodge stands is the old tracing board of the
Dionysiac (Greek) Architects, and while the modern
organization is no longer limited to workmen’s guilds it
still preserves its symbols."

Incredible that they invoke Dionysos - the God worshipped in the Eleusinian Mysteries, the rituals for which involved the taking of hallucinogenic substances (most likely ergot, which, when prepared correctly, has LSD in it).

So far for the subjective, the objective experience of the checkerboard hallucinations could be down to the overloading of neural structures that are usually gated at a different frequency that allows contrast detection and on those structures our detection of movement is based.

This may answer how it happens in our corporeal bodies, though I'm not sure this is confirmed yet, but it is the 'why' that I am most interested in.

Maybe it is in moving across the checkerboard floor, mastering order from the chaos, you are able to transcend to the altar where the ceremony is carried out. so dimensional travel etc

I think this is a very interesting concept. I read it as transcending the dichotomy between order and chaos - yin and yang. Presumably this is why there is a deiety after this gatekeeper room - it is that which has transcended the eternal conflict.

I wonder if you could radioisotope(?) trace the DMT molecule to see it hitting these neural structures of contrast detection before reaching more complex structures in the brain taking you deeper into yourself. Akin to the crossing the floor and to the altar.

That would be pretty cool - but I don't have enough of a scientific background to seriously comment.

As Above so Below.

Am I to read in some occult influences here? If so, I have been reading a bit into hermeticism - so let me know if you have any cool resources. I find this person quite interesting: https://www.youtube.com/user/ArcesseEum

Don't expect to get any instant meaning of such experiences. It is the language our meat brains take a lot of time to proceess sometimes, a symbolic non-dualistic language of higher levels of consciousness.

Strongest experiences take a while to make something of, to integrate, sometimes years.

Agree. I am still mulling this experience over. I imagine it will take some time to integrate. Always interested in the perspectives of others though

 

[Duncan Disorderly]

Have you seen anything like the goddess? Do you think it's real? What do you think it means?

Funny, I posted in a thread yesterday and mentioned a goddess. The goddess I mention was human and made of light, yet she had substance. It's as if light could take form and be something you can touch. When I encountered her, I was overwhelmed by her beauty. She was the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. At first, she was facing me, without any expression on her face. My sense was, she was assessing me.

Finally, she must have liked what she saw and smiled at me. When she smiled, I felt pure joy. The sense of love I felt was so comforting. Also, it was more than a feeling of love I felt. It was as if the love was something you could touch, it had substance. Now that I think about it, the love was a bit like her form. She was made of light, yet the light had substance. Odd how that never dawned on me until now. It was a remarkable experience.

What does it mean? That is a tough question to answer. Quite often, I am faced with the same questions. It's only natural to ask, how, what, why. If the answer isn't crystal clear, I don't try to force it. Some questions are unanswerable. To pursue them is foolhardy and to make any assumptions is somewhat ignorant. So, there are times I prefer to accept the truth. There is no answer. Saying that, it's not uncommon for answers to eventually cross my path. In fact, an answer of sorts just dawned on me as I wrote this comment. This makes me wonder if I would have found the answer through pursuit. Perhaps the unanswerable questions prefer to remain that way or to present the solution for you on its own terms.

Now, you said your goddess had an elephant's head. That is something I can address with more confidence. I am addressing this separately because I have encountered another entity that is connected to the elephant head. In one of my earliest breakthroughs, I met a two-dimensional being. Imagine an image on the PC that has been made into a wireframe and you have an idea.

There was a strong sense of the Divine with this entity. We spoke for a bit and I was able to surmise that this entity was more than 2D. If you can imagine a piece of paper as 2D and if you take both ends of the paper, you can make a tube. This would take it from 2D to 3D. Rinse and repeat and it moves up another dimension. This meant the entity was multi-dimensional.

When I returned to Earth, I kicked myself because I never asked its name. Oddly, it was the one and only time a name has mattered to me. Eventually, I encountered it again. This time, I introduced myself and it told me it already knew my name. It explained that it had many names and a name in their terms is more of a description. In other words, I would be male, human, and whatever other description you could think of. The name it gave me was either Avaneesh or Aveneesha. After I returned, I Googled the names and my jaw hit the floor. There were variations of the name, both with and without the A at the end.

The name(s) is one of the many names of Lord Ganesh (or Ganesha), the elephant-headed Hindu God and I had a sense of the Divine. Lord Ganesh is the God of new beginnings. He is the remover of obstacles, amongst other things. Now, let's get our head around this. I was told it had many names and that proved true. As well, I noted that when I read the different names of Lord Ganesh, they were literal meanings. Avaneesh basically means, lord or master of the world. I was told it could move through dimensions and Lord Ganesh is the remover of obstacles. I encountered him during one of my first experiences, at the beginning of my experience with DMT. Like I said, God of new beginnings. It takes a lot to convince me if something is true. All of this is hard to ignore.

I believe you encountered Lord Ganesha. However, you saw the female aspect. For me, I sensed the masculine. Lord Ganesh has both a masculine and feminine aspect. Hence, Ganesh (male), Ganesha (female). Like me, you also had a sense of the Divine. Many people report seeing Lord Ganesh in the elephant form. Funny how you also saw Him/Her in your very first experience, similar to myself. I believe He showed Himself to me in His most basic form because He knew I needed to find the answer myself, as I am a doubter and won't accept anything on face value alone.

Finally, it's worth noting that I didn't know much about the Hindu religion beforehand.

EDIT: Guess I still don't know much about Hinduism. I had to edit this because I was unaware that Lord Ganesh had both masculine and feminine aspects until today. In fact, I had questioned if perhaps you were mistaken. It was only after I posted that I found this out. Don't know how I didn't notice this detail before. How ironic is that, especially after saying answers present themselves to me?

Peace.
DD.

As Above so Below.

Damn. Those four words have been following me all week.

Peace.
DD.