Im not much for introductions so I'll just jump right into my story. This was my first time ever trying DMT and its almost impossible to truly describe what REALLY happened in depth, because it is so hard to describe these complex emotions. Basically I did plan on doing DMI from the start of the night, but I made the decision to get very intoxicated before I decided to smoke. I read online that alcohol kind of nulls the effects of DMT to an extent, and I was scared going into my first trip so I thought I would drink to not have as an intense first time. This turned out to be a huge mistake. Directly after I took the first hit this bare feeling hit me, it was almost as if i was in a mirage I held it in and blew out the smoke . I took the second hit and feel into a deep state of nothingness for a period of time, nothing existed except for my personal thoughts. My friends tell me that directly after I took the second hit I was laying on the couch convulsing and throwing up. This is most likely a product of being a lot more intoxicated then I should have been, and justing being overwhelmed with new emotions. I stood up and blankly stared at my peers. I remember laughing and repeating over and over while pointing at my different friends. "you know, that I know, that she knows, THAT HE KNOWS, that I know, that he knows" each time pointing at someone new. I remember being asked.... What do we know? I replied "NOTHING, we don't know anything" and laughing hysterically I sat down. Time was not a concept to me, it was something that didn't enter my mind. As a result I don't actually recall in which order these events happened or even if I'm describing them correctly. I have no way of deciphering my thoughts and vocal speech from one another. I remember laying down and hearing comforting words from a friend of mine "we're here with you, we are watching you, we are taking care of you". These words had such a powerful effect on my mind. I was instantly filled with the most alluring intense emotions of love and affection for my peers. I felt like everyone had like a deeper understanding of eachother. I felt like everyone in the room was connected. It was beauty at its purest form, but in a way I have never felt before. I appreciated everyone, and I felt as if we were all the same person. I remember also looking up at my friend and saying, "he knows" pointing at him, "HE KNOWS" even louder.I repeated this several times. I felt as if I had a special connection with my friend, and he could feel and understand what was happening to me. I experienced no visuals, only very deep feelings of love and understanding.
After this experience we decided we were going to do some shrooms. I'm not going to go in depth about the shroom experience, thats just another piece of the puzzle before I got home. I was still heavily intoxicated and now coming off a shroom high. I lay in my bed for hours not being able to feel any kind of resemblance of fatigue. Wide awake I peer into my mind a pry out more information and details about my experience. When I finally got to sleep is when things got weird. Every time I close my eyes it was like my experience was happening again. I could not make out the difference of reality and illusion. I fell asleep several times and woke up. My dreams felt exactly like my DMT trip. Every time I woke up from my dream. It felt like this was all an experience that happen after my first hit, from laying on the couch, to going outside for a smoke after, to laying on my friends chair unable to move. It felt like I was going to snap into reality and be standing in front of my friends, and be back in my original situation. This coupled with hours of personal thought and complex reflection on the world and the people in it made up the rest of my night, slipping in and out of a dream like state between reality and imagination.
After this experience we decided we were going to do some shrooms. I'm not going to go in depth about the shroom experience, thats just another piece of the puzzle before I got home. I was still heavily intoxicated and now coming off a shroom high. I lay in my bed for hours not being able to feel any kind of resemblance of fatigue. Wide awake I peer into my mind a pry out more information and details about my experience. When I finally got to sleep is when things got weird. Every time I close my eyes it was like my experience was happening again. I could not make out the difference of reality and illusion. I fell asleep several times and woke up. My dreams felt exactly like my DMT trip. Every time I woke up from my dream. It felt like this was all an experience that happen after my first hit, from laying on the couch, to going outside for a smoke after, to laying on my friends chair unable to move. It felt like I was going to snap into reality and be standing in front of my friends, and be back in my original situation. This coupled with hours of personal thought and complex reflection on the world and the people in it made up the rest of my night, slipping in and out of a dream like state between reality and imagination.