First scary one

[ChickenTikka]

i thought i had a break through earlier today, but a couple of minutes ago i just broke through to another level, and it was scary.

I have no idea what the dose was, I melted all the dmt from previous use back into the plug of the inspirator mkII, it was enough to completely block the airflow until i took the lighter to it, and i kept blasting it until i couldn't get any more from it.

As with all experiences its hard to explain but it would probably be some sort of incarnation of the machine elves, contantly shifting and changing, it was like an endless tunnel of it, although not a tunnel at all. It was just a mental overload far too intense, so fast, there was no message, no sense of entities or beings, nothing just endless repetition that i was stuck in.

I have no idea why, but it just brought on so much fear, so i just reminded myself i have to just sit through it for a few minutes and it will all be over, after enduring it for a while i lied down and it seemed to disrupt it and take it down a notch so i then opened my eyes and enjoyed watching the room shift about and had a bit of a laugh afterwards.

The experience before that much earlier today was much more pleasant, and there was so much more to it, i was just gazing about this shifting space of patterns, to then be directed to a particular area by 2 beings that i knew were male and female without any kind of visual identification as they were part of the patterns. The spaces then opened up and showed patterns of a different flavour that told a story of some sort, the beings stressed how important it was for me to watch and understand it, there was so much too it in contrast.

I'd like a bit of input, is it that dmt is too much for my brain, or did i just smoke far too much? As there was not really anything that scary about the visuals themselves, but the experience was.

It hasn't put me off at all though, i'll probably try some more tomorrow and just hope i don't get that again.

 

[VisualAnemia]

Hey ChickenTikka!

To answer your question we would really need to know the dosage, without the info it's impossible to make anything out of it, always weigh your dosage!

Also "It hasn't put me off at all though, i'll probably try some more tomorrow and just hope i don't get that again."

Then what is your purpose of using spice? Personally I enjoy exploring new ground and to expand my horizons =)

Good luck on your future travels, be safe!

 

[Psychonaut In Orbit]

SWIM has had experiences like these, it's like one is stuck in a bizarre continuum . SWIM has went from one extreme to another before also... from taking one trip and not touching it again for a week or so to doing it 6-8 times in one day. SWIM feels that the latter can be a bit of sensory overload and he tends to be more prone to getting to the outer reaches of hyperspace where things can get a little hectic. SWIM says maybe lengthen your breaks in between and absorb as much as you can from each trip... absorb as much natural energy in your real life too and see what happens. Meditation helps too... SWIM is not saying meditation can stop a scary trip from happening but with him, meditation gives him a slight control over the direction when hyperspacing.

 

[ChickenTikka]

Hey ChickenTikka!

Then what is your purpose of using spice? Personally I enjoy exploring new ground and to expand my horizons =)

It is definitely very interesting to look back on, i don't regret it at all, but it would be nice to not have to wish an experience to end.

I suppose i got what i was asking for, i was not ignorant to the possibility getting scared but was leaning towards the idea that the most prepared individuals would have little to fear. I suppose i was prepared, and kept myself relatively calm, but the most interesting part was that i cant work out what induced the fear as there was nothing to really be scared of.

Also there wasn't really a way to weigh the dose since it was all that had collected from a number of uses.

 

[tele]

It hasn't put me off at all though, i'll probably try some more tomorrow and just hope i don't get that again.

I think you should try waiting for at least two days, but do as you please.

I think the experience you described sounds completely normal.

 

[ChickenTikka]

Normal as in that's what people should expect from most break through experiences? Or normal to just get one that you might not enjoy like that randomly?

I obviously have much to learn, but am a bit impatient hence why i was looking to give it another go tomorrow.

I suppose its most likely i was not truly prepared for what DMT had in store, but then if it was predictable it wouldn't be so interesting.

 

[tele]

Normal as in that's what people should expect from most break through experiences? Or normal to just get one that you might not enjoy like that randomly?

I obviously have much to learn, but am a bit impatient hence why i was looking to give it another go tomorrow.

I suppose its most likely i was not truly prepared for what DMT had in store, but then if it was predictable it wouldn't be so interesting.

Normal in a sense that you have to be prepared to be unprepared for what DMT has in store for you. It is different each time, even after 100 journeys, it's an endless pit. How deep down the rabbit hole do you want to go?

Take your time, don't rush. I have found that if I smoke too often it gives a lesson. Luckily I learnt from the first time. More often than two sessions per week in my opinion is a bit too much, but everyone has their own preferences, I'm just talking bout my experience. Good luck and keep on exploring with respect of the deepest nature(hopefully).

 

[VisualAnemia]

Normal as in that's what people should expect from most break through experiences?

Just about right I would say, most people are somewhat afraid of unknown things, DMT brings upon alot of ungraspable things and these might frigthen the traveler because they couldn't expect anything like it in their wildest imagination.

Personally I will re-enter the realms of DMT with no expectations whatsoever and simply go with it, just shut off as if one was about to go to sleep, you dont think, you dont try anything but letting the ride carry you through it like the space ship takes its passengers beyond our atmosphere.

I think, this is a genuine example when one just has to "surrender" as with ayahuasca, let go off control and surrender to whatever might happen and I believe that the ego-death might be the somewhat frightening part for most travelers at higher dosages because of how fast its happening.

I hope I was able to contribute with some answers = )

 

[ChickenTikka]

Interesting point concerning the surrendering bit, i don't know how or what i would have surrendered to. I just sat there with my eyes closed with my only thought being i'm just going to have to ride this out now.

Anyway thanks everyone for the input.

Tele, you could be right there, it was my third attempt of the day i got the not so enjoyable experience. One mild, followed by a nice breakthrough, then the mind blowing one.

 

[VisualAnemia]

Interesting point concerning the surrendering bit.

Surrender to everything, joy, grief, horror, beauty, it's quite a task to actually be able to let it all go but from experience I'd say its the best way to do it, mostly because it allows you to observe and to learn without having your emotions crippling and distracting you from your journey.

I just sat there with my eyes closed

I really found this interesting though, where you, during your journey, aware of having your eyes closed? This is what I think scared me the most, that I so quickly left my body, I had no contact what so ever with it, I was simply put in another world not knowing anything about what i was really doing.

Thats also the reason I think a sitter is really important, to be able to reasure yourself that you didn't run around like a maniac but actually sat still the whole time, this was one of my first concerns when I began coming down; Had I been running around like a mad man in a invisible rubber ball?

 

[PrimateSphinx]

ALWAYS and i repeat ALWAYS weigh your dose or at least start really small and work your way up til you can eyeball it. Know your spice! I too have had a similar overly intense experience where I got probably 60mg in one hit out of a bong, maybe more. Long story short i appeared in a space that was nothing but empty whiteness, saw my entire life in two minutes, forgot my life and any idea of who i was and had to run upstairs and ask my friends who i was. It was really scary to say the least. I doubt i will ever try anything over 40 mg again, even that is pushing it for me now. I think just really big does are just way to much for at least my human psyche to handle. Its to much of a shock to the nervous system

 

[tele]

Thats also the reason I think a sitter is really important, to be able to reasure yourself that you didn't run around like a maniac but actually sat still the whole time, this was one of my first concerns when I began coming down; Had I been running around like a mad man in a invisible rubber ball?

Sitter could affect one also negatively, it really depends on the person, so it's hard to recommend with certainty here.

Pshphinx;

I agree, weighing doses is very important. However sometimes I tend not to, but that's only due to eyeballing +/-5mg ability.

 

[VisualAnemia]

Sitter could affect one also negatively, it really depends on the person, so it's hard to recommend with certainty here.

Well regarding a sitter, I for example, had my best friend with me and he brought nothing but good aid to the journey while I however had no connections to him while peak/plateu'ing. I just cant imagine coming down from a insanely intense trip and have no one to talk to about it because there is so much to process and talk about IMO.

So perhaps if the sitter is your casual friend knowing jack about this sort of thing, this might not be the best choice. Other than that I have a hard time seeing a sitter as something negative, especially with spice!

I agree, weighing doses is very important. However sometimes I tend not to, but that's only due to eyeballing +/-5mg ability.

It may be my inexperience with the substance itself but I would never try eyeball it because of IMO obvious reasons, its density can vary so much, I have had really large flakes thats shown up to mostly consist of air while the white powder scraped from the sides weighs up heavy in comparison due to its density. Plus if you DO choose to eyeball, you can't contribute with the important information of dosage!

 

[tele]

Sitter could affect one also negatively, it really depends on the person, so it's hard to recommend with certainty here.

Well regarding a sitter, I for example, had my best friend with me and he brought nothing but good aid to the journey while I however had no connections to him while peak/plateu'ing. I just cant imagine coming down from a insanely intense trip and have no one to talk to about it because there is so much to process and talk about IMO.

So perhaps if the sitter is your casual friend knowing jack about this sort of thing, this might not be the best choice. Other than that I have a hard time seeing a sitter as something negative, especially with spice!

I agree, weighing doses is very important. However sometimes I tend not to, but that's only due to eyeballing +/-5mg ability.

It may be my inexperience with the substance itself but I would never try eyeball it because of IMO obvious reasons, its density can vary so much, I have had really large flakes thats shown up to mostly consist of air while the white powder scraped from the sides weighs up heavy in comparison due to its density. Plus if you DO choose to eyeball, you can't contribute with the important information of dosage!

The thing is that everyone's different. And I stated that sitter doesn't suit everyone and that's true, some people just don't want to give attention to anything except the journey within. About talking about it, well, theres nothing to talk about as it can't be put into words:wink:

I stated that I tend not to sometimes weight my doses(I didn't recommend it), and that's because even if I accidentally load 10mg more than intended, I have no trouble handling it as I know I will not exceed 45mg by any chance and anything below that I can handle without being "Oh, I loaded too much"

 

[Purges]

Everyone gets their ass kicked at some point, I think it's an important step in your explorations if you want to continue working with this substance. I've been plunged into the pit of panic and fear a couple of times, very important lessons in keeping your cool and riding it out IMO, but certainly about as far from fun as you can get :shock:

I too find that these sorts of journeys come from excessive use - once to twice a week for me these days MAX. Haven't touched it since my epic Birthday journey about two weeks ago, that one is still sinking in. EPIC. 8)

 

[tele]

I too find that these sorts of journeys come from excessive use - once to twice a week for me these days MAX. Haven't touched it since my epic Birthday journey about two weeks ago, that one is still sinking in. EPIC. 8)

Haha, I can tell you that your journeys will be most likely deeper than they were before the day of epicness. Rebirth is the day DMT turns the page, at least so it did for me.

 

[Purges]

I don't know whether to :shock: or :d about that to be honest! Probably both at the same time in true hyperspace fashion he he 8) All I know is the way my journeys are going at the moment, I couldn't imagine any more depth! But I know it's there! :shock:

 

[ChickenTikka]

Against tele's advice i tried for another experience since i just had to know, that vibration and lightness you get in your head, before you blast off is normally quite pleasant, straight away i got a really aggressive drilling shaking feeling in my head, a sign of something bad to come. I didn't hit it too hard and took just enough so that it wasn't too bad, its a shame it brought on such negative feelings since the visual aspect would have been really amazing otherwise, but it centred around some skeleton type thing with dancing shapes with some sort of tribal beat, it was a bit demonic i suppose, i didn't ride this one out and just left my eyes open for the most of it and let it pass watching the room shift about in much the same way but without the intensity.

It gave me a much better understanding of what scared me about the previous experience since due to the lesser intensity i was able to better evaluate it.

It would appear for me its down to the sensation in the head which is so unpleasant almost painful in a way due to the intensity, and then its knowing one has to sit through this unpleasantness with no escape, it was like a drilling sensation, penetrating my brain. I just don't think any mental state can deal with such sensations and experiences in the same way you cant enjoy getting hurt.

Anyway it wasn't too stressful and i'm glad i tried it as it has given me an understanding of my limits and what to expect from DMT. Not only that i can really appreciate the bad experiences people report here.

This definitely wasn't a dose problem, it was just dmt showing its darker side.

Also about sitters, i tried it earlier yesterday, and it just killed the experience knowing someone was in the room. So we'd end up sitting in another room while the other person enjoyed their experience.

I'll just add, if i did that the extra hit, it would have gone far beyond yesterdays experience, and not in a good way.

 

[VisualAnemia]

even if I accidentally load 10mg more than intended, I have no trouble handling it as I know I will not exceed 45mg by any chance

I have two questions regarding this;
1. If its a give or take on 10mg, how would you know that the dose won't exceed 45mg considering you never weighed the dose that you added in the first place?

Don't get me wrong now thinking that I'm throwing accusations at you, I'm just curious on how you're thinking regarding this matter because, as of how I see it, these statements of yours are bare assumptions?

2. I'm quite the nazi about methods, when you aim for a breakthrough, how do you see to it that you succeed in doing this, and have you with your current technique had "misfires" where you fail at achieving the "level"/dose you endeavour to accomplish? (Smoking device, technique etc.)

Happy weekend!

 

[VisualAnemia]

you cant enjoy getting hurt.

Also about sitters, i tried it earlier yesterday, and it just killed the experience knowing someone was in the room. So we'd end up sitting in another room while the other person enjoyed their experience.

Some people do enjoy getting hurt, believe me
However, if one where to Dr.Phil you on your experience, I would say that you might have a bit of anxiety towards the use of the substance which negatively affects your experience. My motto regarding ALL substances is; You are where you wanted to be. Regardless of the color of your experience, you wanted it and therefore you must also accept the outcome no matter how dire it might be.

IMO I believe that this is one of the great things spice can teach you, how to overcome your fears and how to avoid being amazed so that you can fully observe and try to understand and decipher the experience.

Interesting how much it can differ on having a sitter or not : ) Personally I see my friend as a safety precaution, guide, and foremost friend with whom I share these sacred experiences with

I hope I was able to shed some light over your worried mind!