Go for it, long as you are both in good health.
No offense at all to Dethrone, the sentiment is very kind and may not be meant literally, but I strongly advise you not to rely on luck, at all. We have great power to create that few are aware of and choose to use. Whatever state you are in now is a result of your having used this power, so look at the condition of your life, no matter how unpleasant it may be as evidence of your power to create. Naturally our innate power to create can be used for healing and to create beautiful circumstances in our lives just as we have used it, in the past, to create our miseries. This is by no means easy and may require years of work, I've been at it almost unceasingly for seven years now and am not yet completely healed, but the rewards of the effort are priceless. I had PTSD from 2yrs of age, which I didn't become aware of until my 30's when after beginning to meditate on awareness, I started having flashbacks. I was gripped by fear for most of my life and it has required years of continuous effort and intention to accomplish, but the work required pales before the result. Coming out of fear is, I feel, why we are here.
So, whether you do this or not, use your own power to set an intention that whatever you experience and whatever you choose to do, it will be maximally healing for you. Say to yourself something to the effect of, "I will heal and this will help me to heal to the maximum possible degree." Meditate on this, focus on it. Repeat it to yourself in whatever form seems right for you many, many times during the days or weeks leading up to this. You have nothing to lose by doing this, even if it sounds strange, it could only help. It has for myself and others. If you believe in some sort of higher power, call on that to help you heal as well.
There are emotional and psychological currents in us that run directly against healing, do your best to create a drive in yourself that runs counter to these and overpowers them.
To get the most bang for your buck and also your time, it would be best to prepare yourselves by eating a very clean diet for maybe a week or so in advance. If you can manage it, you might even want to begin this diet with a day or two of water fasting. The main purpose of this would be to increase your mental and physical energy and clarify the mind, as this will allow you to use the medicine to it's greatest effect. It would also be psychologically fortifying, give a feeling of empowerment going into the session. Be well rested as well.
Keep in mind that whatever unpleasant feelings or thoughts you uncover through your use of entheogens, have been in you for some time wreaking havoc on your lives and that they must be felt to be healed. Observe the experience with whatever degree of detachment you can muster. No matter how disturbing what you experience is, it is not in any way final and can be healed.
If your partner is open to this sort of thinking, you may try sharing.
Of course if you use ibogaine hcl or total alkaloid extract, instead of just eating the bark, then if you haven't already, refer to the mg/kg or lb of bodyweight dosing guidelines. If you use bark try to eat as much as you can and if you purge it, wait awhile and eat more, repeat this until it feels like you can't eat any more. I don't believe one can overdose on the bark, rather it is about getting a strong enough dose, the Bwiti literally force feed it repeatedly during their initiations.
From my experience of having been administered to by my friend, I'd say that your shared experience has the potential to be more meaningful if anything. I never saw my friend in a more beautiful light as when he was sitting next to me during the trip. He takes being a healer very seriously though so your mileage may vary.
I hope this works out and is healing for both of you. Good luck.
I will leave you with one last thing. I went and found this long but awesome Nisargadatta Maharaj quote, if acted on,
it addresses and solves your and your partner's situations in their entirety. Being enlightened he says it far better than I, but I have studied him and others like him for years so I went through the quote and have put in bold what can actually be considered practice instructions that will ultimately lead to your healing. The key is to pay attention to your awareness whenever possible, whether throughout the day, in meditation or while using entheogens, simply that will eventually heal you, although entheogens may speed the process of becoming aware up. Eckhart Tolle, a teacher you may be more familiar with often uses the term Presence in place of Awareness. Towards the end he speaks of a period of "bringing the roof down on your head"(Tolle calls this part of awakening "feeling the pain body"), this is the stage of becoming aware of the contents of your subconscious and will take longer the more screwed up you are to start with. If you become proficient at staying in Awareness your life may initially feel worse. "Feel it to heal it" has become cliched, but if you have much trauma you will find it is no joke.
Have faith when you release darkness from inside you.
Q: I find being alive a painful state.
M: You cannot be alive for you are life itself.
It is the person you imagine yourself to be that suffers, not you.
Dissolve it in awareness.
It is merely a bundle of memories and habits.
From the awareness of the unreal to the awareness of your real nature there is a chasm which you will easily cross, once you have mastered the art of pure awareness.
Q: All I know is that I do not know myself.
M: How do you know, that you do not know your self?
Your direct insight tells you that yourself you know first, for nothing exists to you without your being there to experience its existence.
You imagine you do not know your self, because you cannot describe your self.
You can always say: 'I know that I am' and you will refuse as untrue the statement: 'I am not'.
But whatever can be described cannot be your self, and what you are cannot be described.
You can only know your self by being yourself without any attempt at self-definition and self-description.
Once you have understood that you are nothing perceivable or conceivable, that whatever appears in the field of consciousness cannot be your self, you will apply yourself to the eradication of all self-identification, as the only way that can take you to a deeper realisation of your self.
You literally progress by rejection -- a veritable rocket.
To know that you are neither in the body nor in the mind, though aware of both, is already self-knowledge.
Q: If I am neither the body nor mind, how am I aware of them?
How can I perceive something quite foreign to myself?
M: 'Nothing is me,' is the first step.
'Everything is me' is the next.
Both hang on the idea: 'there is a world'.
When this too is given up, you remain what you are -- the non-dual Self.
You are it here and now, but your vision is obstructed by your false ideas about your self.
Q: Well, I admit that I am, I was, I shall be; at least from birth to death.
I have no doubts of my being, here and now.
But I find that it is not enough.
My life lacks joy, born of harmony between the inner and the outer.
If I alone am and the world is merely a protection, then why is there disharmony?
M:
You create disharmony and then complain!
When you desire and fear, and identify yourself with your feelings, you create sorrow and bondage.
When you create, with love and wisdom, and remain unattached to your creations, the result is harmony and peace.
But whatever be the condition of your mind, in what way does it reflect on you?
It is only your self-identification with your mind that makes you happy or unhappy.
Rebel against your slavery to your mind, see your bonds as self- created and break the chains of attachment and revulsion.
Keep in mind your goal of freedom, until it dawns on you that you are already free, that freedom is not something in the distant future to be earned with painful efforts, but perennially one's own, to be used!
Liberation is not an acquisition but a matter of courage, the courage to believe that you are free already and to act on it.
Q: If I do as I like, I shall have to suffer.
M: Nevertheless, you are free.
The consequences of your action will depend on the society in which you live and its conventions.
Q: I may act recklessly.
M: Along with courage will emerge wisdom and compassion and skill in action.
You will know what to do and whatever you do will be good for all.
Q: I find that the various aspects of myself are at war between themselves and there is no peace in me.
Where are freedom and courage, wisdom and compassion?
My actions merely increase the chasm in which I exist.
M: It is all so, because you take yourself to be somebody, or something.
Stop, look, investigate, ask the right questions, come to the right conclusions and have the courage to act on them and see what happens.
The first steps may bring the roof down on your head, but soon the commotion will clear and there will be peace and joy.
You know so many things about yourself, but the knower you do not know.
Find out who you are, the knower of the known. (By Knower he means the Awareness that is Aware of everything, your body, thoughts, surroundings, in fact of the entire universe. By the known he means your thoughts, your human body and it's surroundings, the DMT trip you are having, everything. He is saying that all of creation is inside you, that you are everything and the awareness of everything.)
Look within diligently, remember to remember that the perceived cannot be the perceiver.
Whatever you see, hear or think of, remember -- you are not what happens, you are the awareness to whom it happens.
Delve deeply into the sense 'I am' and you will surely discover that the perceiving centre is universal, as universal as the light that illumines the world.
All that happens in the universe happens to you, the silent witness.
On the other hand, whatever is done, is done by you, the universal and inexhaustible energy.
