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Hello, Nexus!

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Camilo

Camilo Arturo
OH boy, I've been meaning to do this for so long, I dont even know how to start....I even bookmarked the "create a new topic in introduction essay forum" :lol:

You see guys, I see this as a step forward in really bringing the lessons of entheogens into my life, Really deep down, I just want to be what McKenna would call a fisher; I want to mean to the world beautiful and awesome ideas, and make people feel like SO MUCH MORE is possible.

I'm Colombian and I'm 25, I'm an animator....I really dont want to drag on explaining this, but basically towards the end of my higschool I got really really deep into pixelart (like supernes graphics if you dont know what that is), it was my way of diving into the internet...it was great! I had a gig at 17 and it paid well, I had a great comunity of pixelers and I had respect there. This community allowed me to gouge away....I was so absorbed by my online persona I got a warped vision of myself, thankfully towards my 20's I noticed it became too much...you know I became just frustrated with myself because time would pass and I wouldnt know...days....weeks...months and I had almost no contact with anybody AND my art wasnt going anywhere, I wanted to reach a point where I could make shorts instead of 5 secs animations but I JUST COULDNT GET THERE.

I needed a way out, and I figured film was like real life animation, I thought I'd learn about how to make films (write scripts, light scenes, direct actors....all that) with a 2 year film course. it was great, it was like a late adolescence for me, and the best part is that I ended it trying out Ayahuasca =)

I'll admit the way I tried it was a bit...weird, but perfect for the time. I went to a Temaxcal...which is a beautiful ceremony in which you're supposed to go to rebirth...I can say that I did!

EDIT: I took Yage/ayahuasca in said Temaxcal :p

...ugh I cant keep writing right now but I dont want to NOT post this again I'll just post this WIP....hope you guys dont mind! :shock:
 
haha dont worry you can add more to your thread later, glad you finally took the time to introduce yourself!

Welcome to the Nexus! Bienvenido!

I had a few friends participate in temazcal and indeed they say it is a very very moving experience, death-rebirth. I dont know how I feel about being in the dark in a very very hot place and not really being able to get out, even though I can imagine if (lol) I survive it will for sure be amazingly marking in my life and humbling.

Did you take any psychedelics yet?

See you around!
 
thanks, endlessness =) I had written one or two attempts at the essay but I never actually posted it, which is why I posted this one even if unfinished :p

so, yeah it turned out the temaxcal was a "medicine" temaxcal....and the medicine just happened to be Yage! I've done Yage, Mezcalito and Psilocybin shrooms in my days....some marijuana in the filmcourse too...marijuana usually makes me think of duality in a bad way, I get very stuck in division and start overanalazing and go on self guilt trips.

The temaxcal was a beautiful experience....I remember it as just endless gratitude...I remember I used to say that it was it felt like infinity squared, infinity infinite times...=) I was blown away by the psicodelic experience...and the temaxcal was a perfect setting to get into it!

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Work in progress
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I'm going for dinner and I'll finish this later :p
 
Hello, welcome.

You sound like a cool guy. I'd love to see some of your pixel art. Maybe you could upload a piece of your work?

I've never heard of this "Temaxcal" thing, sounds interesting. Will you be trying ayahuasca again?

Peace
 
thanx Wave Rider n ragabr, here is some of my pixelart MORE of my pixels, a shot I made for Plympton's Guard Dog Jam and my tumblr . None of it is really psychodelic...I would like to make my art have that quality but I feel there's a lot geometry involved in making it look trully hallucinogenic (like AlexGrey) but I would like nothing more than to give that sense of splendour of ideas with my art. I'm a fan of Alan Moore so I want to be a Magician of symbols, I'm a fan of Charlie Kaufman so I'd like to tell everyday drama with uncanny metaphores, I'm a fan of AlexGrey, Miles Davis, GurrenLagann so I'd like to show the splendor of imagination trough my art.

I would very much like to do Yage again...but this time I would like to do it in the jungle...I havent really found the right way to do this yet.

The temaxcal was great, but it was close to the capital...it's a mountain area, and while the place had no trace of city it still isnt jungle. Since several of you said you had no idea what a temxcal is, it's basically a ritual sauna for cleansind rebirth. I looked for some pics, I noticed there's a lot more pictures of temaxcals in stone igloos, but I did it in something more like a tent, like this one when it's completed it always has a fire on next to it there are a lot of rituals involved which I dont really know about, but the fire is supposed to be like a placenta, and the tent like an uterus, since temaxcal is a rebirth and all. They told us not to go between the fire and the tent...but I accidentaly did it...I just stuck a foot betwen the tent and the fire..and it was amazing, there really was a cord of heat between the two, it was really like a spiritual umbilic cord in there. The fire mostly was there so they could heat the "abuelas" (Grandmothers) rocks for the temaxcal.

it was a pretty large group going in that little tent, something like 20-30 people...it was very tight for sure, when we first came in...we had to go in rings into it, first ring was women and children and men came in the outside ring. it was tight and hot in there you didnt have much room to move, I had a little kid at my back kicking at me...I was a little worried even though I was going to take yage.

First, they passed a tobacco around, the tobacco is the plant of words and of intention, so this was the final moment to state your intention and make it as clear as possible before the yage. The yage came, they passed a little glass like a shot of yage around, to me it tasted very very bitter, it looked like I was drinking a glass of dirt from the earth....first reflex was to spit it out but I convinced myself I was drinking pacha mama and I gulped it in....once I thought it was pacha mama it wasnt that bad...it's only a little bit more bitter than pure coffe.

there were a lot of songs and chants in the tent, the leaders of the temaxcal spoke, they told us to say "aho" if we agreed (sorta like amen :p), they spoke about the state of the earth and the irresponsability of men towards water and all the elements, they said we should never crap and send it off into a river, we should make a hole in the earth and cover it with tobacco...he understood most of us werent going to do this, but he said to atleast praise the water as a god even if it was just tap water, because water was our mother. I wasnt feeling the yage much at all, so I just started to sway and try to get in the mood of the chants...I think I was one of the first to feel it =)

as I've said before the general feeling was just complete gratitude....the first visions was of myself with ink hair, the hair sort of dripping out of me....then that turned into an image of christ....and then..then I really knew it kicked in, because I didnt need to "try" to see anything to see this, and it was just a myriad of...sweets, heh just colorful emoticons and sweets all over the place, dancing unstoppably...it was pretty much the imagery of mola only with sweets instead of animals Tapirback's Homepage - Tapirs, Wildlife Gifts and more this is when I started to feel what I called infinity squared...it was just and endless stream of gratitude. the space also seemed to get bigger...because I wasnt feeling uncomfortable anymore, actually for some reason I was able to just lie in the ground, somehow we were all a lot more comfortable with everyone around us and that made for the extra space.

There was a remarkable moment, when we were all chanting and a little kid started going "yihaaa" so we all sorta started making a sort of calvary chant, and it was like the kid was riding the chant....it was amazing....we all had a good laugh afterwards. Every time one of the chants ended, we went "aho"...one time I made a really deep and looooong ahoooooooo....and everyone joined in with me....it was...fucking incredible...I saw a spiral drawing itself outside in and I was just satisfied...haha I had taken the lead of the temaxcal for a sec.

The biggest vision came for me a little bit afterwards...I can only describe it as a huge huge pointed-down purple triangle...it looked really powerful, I felt as if it was some kind of god or wise entity....my intention with the temaxcal had been to be better with people, to learn to empathize better with them both because I didnt have a girl and because I was having trouble directing my shorts at the filmschool at the moment....but as soon as I did that it seemed to fade away...I felt like it was saying "hey, I'm not the human here, you worry about doing things that's your job, I'm here to tell you how to be one with nature and have peace of mind"....I felt like I missed a great chance there :p.

Coming out of the temaxcal was beatuiful...I always describe it as if I had been watching life trough TV in a crappy spanish novela, and when I came out I was suddenly watching it in film with perfect lighting....but I bet you guys all already know this ;p The other thing...is it left me very vulnerable, when I came back to the city it seemed very sick to me...I wanted to be all peace and love but the city just didnt seem to get it...even small conflicts like normal arguements seemed so barbaric to me.

I must confess...my temaxcal wasnt all spiritual. The reason I happened to go was because I went with a girl I was sort of going out with...and I did think about her a little bit between visions...I had never dared to actually make a move...but the yage gave me the guts...and she sort of brushed me off with an excuse that I knew wasnt true I got very angry and I didnt talk to her for a long long time...I think it must've been atleast a year or two.

I actually have some more time today, but I think it's been a good thing you guys get 1 or 2 comments in between my narrations so I'm gonna leave it here for now =).

COMING UP NEXT IN MY ESSAY :p

The next time I encountered psychodelics...I did it with the same organization of the temaxcal Sacred fire of Iztachilathlan Colombia but this time it was Peyote and I took my dad with me =).
 
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