Lumos
Live the life out of life!
Salutations people of the Nexus 
I am quite glad to have the chance to join this awesome community. I have been coming here for information for years; but now I feel that it is time for me to give back.
So, where to start? Well at the current moment I am a third year neurochemistry student at my state's main university. Also I am a Dj/producer on the side as music is a huge part of my life. In my current state in life I have reached a high level of happiness that comes from knowing exactly why I have come to exist on this Earth. Reaching this place has been aided by many, many, many entheogen experiences. In fact I have probably tried just about everything, well maybe not everything, in the course of my life. However I was not always this happy or confident about myself or my place in the universe.
This is my intro, it is quite long so feel free to skim lol; I just love to write. I might have gotten carried away and started an autobiography, but that is for you to decide. I hope you enjoy.:thumb_up:
I will start my story at age sixteen, I'm twenty one now. At age sixteen I thought I had somewhat of an idea of who I was. I was a quite kid who loved computers and engineering. My goal in life was to become an optical engineer and work with lasers. Although I never got out much, nor did I do anything very exciting. One fateful day in my sophomore world history class, the girl who sat next to me and whom I occasionally chatted with invited me to come to a rave. At this time I was not aware of my love of music so I had no real reason to go except simple curiosity. When I walked into the warehouse where the event was taking place, I felt a feeling I had never really experienced before, a sense of belonging. This was confirmed when a random person handed me a small folded piece of paper with the words āWhy are you here?ā written in blue highlighter. I thought it may be some kind of anti-drug religious thing; but when I opened it and read its contents I knew I was home. What was written on that paper was none other than the Raverās Manifesto.
After that night I began to attend raves regularly, which really helped open me up. I began to make friends and learned how to be social; and learned to like it. At the time I had no real interest in drugs or anything of that sort. I knew what drugs were and the most I had heard was that they are bad; you know, the typical propaganda and fear mongering. I did not possess any other information on the subject, so what else was I supposed to believe? However, this was the beginning of the end of the āasleep at the wheelā part of my life. With all the exposure to the drug culture I could not help but to be curious. Since I was of the more scientific persuasion, I did not just go out and buy some random pill from some random person. I went home and began to research what this ecstasy thing was all about. I learned what MDMA was and how it worked; in doing this research I became enthralled in the interworkings of the human mind. I began to spend all my time reading anything about the brain I could get my hands on. I did it so much that my grades in my pre-engineering classes in high school started to slip. I was browsing Wikipedia, or lost in some scholarly journal when I was supposed to be doing my assignment in programming; which I was beginning to dislike more and more.
Six months after attending my first rave and countless hours of research, I decided to try MDMA for the first time. This was the moment when my life truly began. The rush of euphoria and the feeling of oneness filled me with a kind of happiness I had never known could exist. I also felt a strong sense of strength because I knew exactly what was going on in my brain with the serotonin reuptakes being reversed by the MDMA and filling my synaptic cleft with the wonderful 5-HT. At this moment I knew I had to devote my life to the study of the brain. However, this began a somewhat dark time in my life. In my excitement I began to try whatever drug came my way, I was āa natural street freak, just eating whatever came by.ā (Hunter S. Thompson) Without thinking I could ever have something like a bad trip, I wound up eating four hits of acid and eight grams of mushrooms on a beach in California. I was thrown into a whirlwind and had my first ego death; my concept of self was split into three separate entities, an experience which I still cannot explain fully in words. These three selves, one being the me who thought drugs are bad, the me who loved to take anything I could get my hands on, and the ānewerā me which said that drugs are something that must be respected and used as tools all had a very long talk. We concluded that drugs are neither bad, nor good; it is all in how they are used.
I began to pursue the more spiritual use of psychedelics after that experience. I learned to meditate and stopped all use of MDMA and pot. I was worried that I might have permanently damaged myself during my ācrazy phaseā, which had just ended. It was at this time that I learned of Ayahuasca, and the shaman who used it. As I learned more I could not resist anymore and bought the materials to make it. My first few attempts to make the ancient brew were futile, resulting in an awful brown drink that only severed to make one very sick. However, my luck was about to change. Several attempts down the road I had made a brew that took on a deep purple color instead of the muddy brown. I still thought that it would fail as I drank the foul concoction; but I would be happily mistaken. When the effects began to manifest I knew that I finally did it. My experience was so profound that I would need another few pages just for it, so Iāll leave it for another time. When I returned I knew that I had to share this experience with everyone who had and open heart and mind. I began to make Ayahuasca regularly, slowly perfecting my method. I often held my own ceremonies where I would guide new comers through the experience and help them integrate it afterwards. The brews that I made for just myself became increasingly stronger and I usually drank Aya at least once a week. This period of time set me on the path to spiritual enlightenment. As the Aya purified my mind and body, I no longer felt the need to use any other drug. I knew my place in this world was to become a teacher. My job in this existence was to learn all that I could; and to use this knowledge to help those around me. My use of Ayahuasca slowed down when I entered college as I focused on my studies of chemistry and biology. I used drugs here and there as I got back into the other types again; but with a wiser outlook they never caused a problem again.
During the course of my studies both in class and in the realms beyond I have learned a huge amount of information. It is my purpose in life to share this knowledge with anyone who will listen. Now I am here to serve the world and help fill it with light and love. I figured that this would be a good place to start.
I am quite glad to have the chance to join this awesome community. I have been coming here for information for years; but now I feel that it is time for me to give back.So, where to start? Well at the current moment I am a third year neurochemistry student at my state's main university. Also I am a Dj/producer on the side as music is a huge part of my life. In my current state in life I have reached a high level of happiness that comes from knowing exactly why I have come to exist on this Earth. Reaching this place has been aided by many, many, many entheogen experiences. In fact I have probably tried just about everything, well maybe not everything, in the course of my life. However I was not always this happy or confident about myself or my place in the universe.
This is my intro, it is quite long so feel free to skim lol; I just love to write. I might have gotten carried away and started an autobiography, but that is for you to decide. I hope you enjoy.:thumb_up:
I will start my story at age sixteen, I'm twenty one now. At age sixteen I thought I had somewhat of an idea of who I was. I was a quite kid who loved computers and engineering. My goal in life was to become an optical engineer and work with lasers. Although I never got out much, nor did I do anything very exciting. One fateful day in my sophomore world history class, the girl who sat next to me and whom I occasionally chatted with invited me to come to a rave. At this time I was not aware of my love of music so I had no real reason to go except simple curiosity. When I walked into the warehouse where the event was taking place, I felt a feeling I had never really experienced before, a sense of belonging. This was confirmed when a random person handed me a small folded piece of paper with the words āWhy are you here?ā written in blue highlighter. I thought it may be some kind of anti-drug religious thing; but when I opened it and read its contents I knew I was home. What was written on that paper was none other than the Raverās Manifesto.
After that night I began to attend raves regularly, which really helped open me up. I began to make friends and learned how to be social; and learned to like it. At the time I had no real interest in drugs or anything of that sort. I knew what drugs were and the most I had heard was that they are bad; you know, the typical propaganda and fear mongering. I did not possess any other information on the subject, so what else was I supposed to believe? However, this was the beginning of the end of the āasleep at the wheelā part of my life. With all the exposure to the drug culture I could not help but to be curious. Since I was of the more scientific persuasion, I did not just go out and buy some random pill from some random person. I went home and began to research what this ecstasy thing was all about. I learned what MDMA was and how it worked; in doing this research I became enthralled in the interworkings of the human mind. I began to spend all my time reading anything about the brain I could get my hands on. I did it so much that my grades in my pre-engineering classes in high school started to slip. I was browsing Wikipedia, or lost in some scholarly journal when I was supposed to be doing my assignment in programming; which I was beginning to dislike more and more.
Six months after attending my first rave and countless hours of research, I decided to try MDMA for the first time. This was the moment when my life truly began. The rush of euphoria and the feeling of oneness filled me with a kind of happiness I had never known could exist. I also felt a strong sense of strength because I knew exactly what was going on in my brain with the serotonin reuptakes being reversed by the MDMA and filling my synaptic cleft with the wonderful 5-HT. At this moment I knew I had to devote my life to the study of the brain. However, this began a somewhat dark time in my life. In my excitement I began to try whatever drug came my way, I was āa natural street freak, just eating whatever came by.ā (Hunter S. Thompson) Without thinking I could ever have something like a bad trip, I wound up eating four hits of acid and eight grams of mushrooms on a beach in California. I was thrown into a whirlwind and had my first ego death; my concept of self was split into three separate entities, an experience which I still cannot explain fully in words. These three selves, one being the me who thought drugs are bad, the me who loved to take anything I could get my hands on, and the ānewerā me which said that drugs are something that must be respected and used as tools all had a very long talk. We concluded that drugs are neither bad, nor good; it is all in how they are used.
I began to pursue the more spiritual use of psychedelics after that experience. I learned to meditate and stopped all use of MDMA and pot. I was worried that I might have permanently damaged myself during my ācrazy phaseā, which had just ended. It was at this time that I learned of Ayahuasca, and the shaman who used it. As I learned more I could not resist anymore and bought the materials to make it. My first few attempts to make the ancient brew were futile, resulting in an awful brown drink that only severed to make one very sick. However, my luck was about to change. Several attempts down the road I had made a brew that took on a deep purple color instead of the muddy brown. I still thought that it would fail as I drank the foul concoction; but I would be happily mistaken. When the effects began to manifest I knew that I finally did it. My experience was so profound that I would need another few pages just for it, so Iāll leave it for another time. When I returned I knew that I had to share this experience with everyone who had and open heart and mind. I began to make Ayahuasca regularly, slowly perfecting my method. I often held my own ceremonies where I would guide new comers through the experience and help them integrate it afterwards. The brews that I made for just myself became increasingly stronger and I usually drank Aya at least once a week. This period of time set me on the path to spiritual enlightenment. As the Aya purified my mind and body, I no longer felt the need to use any other drug. I knew my place in this world was to become a teacher. My job in this existence was to learn all that I could; and to use this knowledge to help those around me. My use of Ayahuasca slowed down when I entered college as I focused on my studies of chemistry and biology. I used drugs here and there as I got back into the other types again; but with a wiser outlook they never caused a problem again.
During the course of my studies both in class and in the realms beyond I have learned a huge amount of information. It is my purpose in life to share this knowledge with anyone who will listen. Now I am here to serve the world and help fill it with light and love. I figured that this would be a good place to start.
.