hi new world

[spacedustbunny]

im spacedustbunny, Im uber new to the psycheadelic realms.. I posted my first dmt trip the other day..in the new members zone? and feel a little stupid how blunt I wrote about it. Im still processing what happened.. and eventhow I was tremendously alarmed how shocking it was I might have shoved it onto the " I had a bad trip" too fast. I guess taking 30 mg and entering what i now have learned is a breakthrough, was too much for inexperienced brain/soul/comprehension.I did jump into the deep end too quick and completely naieve. I ve always been too scared to try mushrooms, even acid. i only tried acid this year. Im in my 30's.. I dont even understand really why I dared try this.. I guess after reading philosophy/arts/science/psychology/religion/spirtuality and anything i could get my hands on or fathom. Dmt introduced itself as all knowledgeble. Choosing to be an atheist ( against organized religions)It spooked me to find myself on the phone with "god". awestruck and in terror. I dont want to try it again as I was convinced I died or was dying or could die/ or loose my mind but I am intrigued none the less. how can you not be. Im just not convinced we should be meddeling in these realms.. or maybe I shouldnt.. its great to find this nexus, enjoying the many threads and thanks for the lovely responces. I apologize for my rather adolescent first trip record, others seem to embody the experience more poetic.. I have left my interpretations at the door and merely recorded what I saw and how I felt. I have in the meantime had extremely long talks about existence etc etc and feel that the dmt breakthrough with screaming entities however terrifying is a tremendous psychological workout.. taking behavorial therapy to awhole new level ( obviously) I dont know if im healing myself because I was confronted with so much fear or If those creepy beings just yelled the hell out of me..yelling ill fitted parts of me back together. no pain, no gain? I would like to experience something nicer thow.. maybe i would go back.. nicer as in.. confident. I was so scared. I cried only a little.. tried to keep myself together. Im afraid of losing my mind. I feel exhausted and on the verge of crying.. anxiety.. bewondered and curious aswell. It would be nice if the beings could just take my hand and show me around a bit more well chilled out..I have the feeling they were reallllllllly pissed off..even thow we did have fun making words with symbols.. that was only short lived. their parents or whatever.. the others were more annoyed with my breakthrough.. like.. ohh man.. who left the door open.. look.. another bloody alien (me) got in. sorry if this didnt make sense. im aware how juvanile i sound. and my spelling is terrible. facepalm. x

 

[TheBridge]

Hi SPD, welcome aboard. Don't worry about how you sound, you sound fine to me. I'm new here too and haven't experienced DMT yet, so I am learning from even the relatively new like you. I've partaken of other traveling experiences, but out of the little I can remember, nothing was as intense as DMT sounds.

Have you considered ayahuasca? From what I understand(I've watched a handful of documentaries and read a bit), it's longer but less intense. It's what I'm aiming to do.

Anyhow, I suppose others will be able to offer you more insight, but I wanted to welcome you and encourage you to keep an open mind to not jumping ship just yet, at least before reading a bit more about possible ways to change your experience should you choose to give it a go again. Thanks for sharing your experience, and I truly can empathize about the being worried about losing my mind part(and body as well), and then seeing it was just temporary, albeit with something other than DMT.