novice_psychonaut
Rising Star
Hi all!
I’m excited to become a part of this community. I’ve been into magic mushrooms for about eight years, and I’ve tried DMT a handful of times (haven’t broken through yet). I joined the Nexus at the beginning of this year for personal research. However, after a couple of failed breakthrough attempts, I sat down the spice and haven’t picked it back up in over three months. I keep waiting for it to feel “right” to take it again, and I believe that time is approaching.
As far as I can tell, I’ve only gotten to the “chrysanthemum” (a la McKenna) and had a couple of different experiences akin to moments from the peak of a ~4g shroom trip. They were obviously hard or impossible to quantify, but astonishing and wonderful. I briefly got the sense that I was finally fully cognizant again after a cycle of limited experience/existence, and that this cycle will repeat in perpetuity. It’s simultaneously exhilarating and slightly terrifying, but I accepted it (which seems always for the best). Then the trips petered out and I couldn’t remember much of anything
.
So I haven’t tripped in a while, and I thought it was because I was afraid of what I’ll experience. But that doesn’t make sense, because all my DMT experiences have been positive, even during brief moments that I realized might be interpretable as scary. I now think that what I have been (and currently am) truly afraid of is chickening out at the moment of truth, when my ears are already ringing and time is slowing toward a halt, and I know that all that separates me from the unfathomable mind-warping expanse of hyperspace is one more premium toke. I’m debating whether to go it alone again or get a sitter to aid me, but I really think I would prefer solitude if possible.
FYI, I have been using a home-made machine (is there any other kind?) for administration. I had a single burned copper mesh ball in the neck of a glass bottle to hold the molten freebase. Last time, I got the notion to push that ball back deeper, sprinkle on a dry 50mg dose, and then closed it in with another burned copper mesh ball to help prevent direct flame contact. I think it would’ve worked, had I not bailed on taking a second hit (the first one was huge, but apparently not huge enough). So sometime soon, I’ll try again.
Anyway, if you’ve read this far, thanks! I hope to have some conversations and share my future trip reports on here. Cheers!
I’m excited to become a part of this community. I’ve been into magic mushrooms for about eight years, and I’ve tried DMT a handful of times (haven’t broken through yet). I joined the Nexus at the beginning of this year for personal research. However, after a couple of failed breakthrough attempts, I sat down the spice and haven’t picked it back up in over three months. I keep waiting for it to feel “right” to take it again, and I believe that time is approaching.
As far as I can tell, I’ve only gotten to the “chrysanthemum” (a la McKenna) and had a couple of different experiences akin to moments from the peak of a ~4g shroom trip. They were obviously hard or impossible to quantify, but astonishing and wonderful. I briefly got the sense that I was finally fully cognizant again after a cycle of limited experience/existence, and that this cycle will repeat in perpetuity. It’s simultaneously exhilarating and slightly terrifying, but I accepted it (which seems always for the best). Then the trips petered out and I couldn’t remember much of anything
.So I haven’t tripped in a while, and I thought it was because I was afraid of what I’ll experience. But that doesn’t make sense, because all my DMT experiences have been positive, even during brief moments that I realized might be interpretable as scary. I now think that what I have been (and currently am) truly afraid of is chickening out at the moment of truth, when my ears are already ringing and time is slowing toward a halt, and I know that all that separates me from the unfathomable mind-warping expanse of hyperspace is one more premium toke. I’m debating whether to go it alone again or get a sitter to aid me, but I really think I would prefer solitude if possible.
FYI, I have been using a home-made machine (is there any other kind?) for administration. I had a single burned copper mesh ball in the neck of a glass bottle to hold the molten freebase. Last time, I got the notion to push that ball back deeper, sprinkle on a dry 50mg dose, and then closed it in with another burned copper mesh ball to help prevent direct flame contact. I think it would’ve worked, had I not bailed on taking a second hit (the first one was huge, but apparently not huge enough). So sometime soon, I’ll try again.
Anyway, if you’ve read this far, thanks! I hope to have some conversations and share my future trip reports on here. Cheers!
