brokedownpalace10
Established member
From the beginning, I have had a hard time with the anthropomorphizing of some of the feelings and things seen by people on DMT. I consider myself a Christian and was a bit afraid of where that would take me. However, now I am beginning to see these things as archetypes or aspects of myself and am not so worried. I may be wrong, I may be right. For now in my journey, parts of me or archetypes is a useful framework and anthropomorphizing is useful for description.
Some background. I've only really used light doses of DMT, maybe medium. The "overlay" of visuals with eyes open in daytime has nearly obscured the "real" world, but not quite. I prefer darkness with eyes closed and I see houses and rooms, kinda.
Some has been straight DMT, some has been Passionflower change, and I have lately experimented with smoking Syrian Rue before the main course. (5-6 hits of Rue, enough to definitely feel). The Rue dramatically changes the experience.
At these doses of DMT, I've not seen any entities but I have experienced a "presence" a couple times. Pure DMT seems to at times have a "goddess" visitor. I've come to see the goddess as the feminine side of me. She's helped me get comfortable with my feminine side and see that I have a strong feminine side but that I really like being a guy. This is good shit to really feel instead of just think.
Passionflower, especially predosing, seems to be a nervous girl. Hiding in the background, trying to be helpful, but without a lot of strength or power.
I can't completely figure Rue out. Thus this post.
Rue seems kind of dark, reptilian, but at the same time a strong and powerful teacher. The first time I predosed with the Rue was the only time I really felt the presence. I heard in my head, over and over, "What about...?, what about...?" with what I didn't type being a very useful but difficult insight.
Rue almost seems like a demon at first, but it's not at all evil at second thought. Strong and dark and powerful, scary and maybe not even particularly benign, but not evil.
I'm throwing words at this without hitting the bullseye. I reserve the right to revise to better words if I can find them. But anyway...
Again, I'm not sure this attribution of independence to these feelings is at all correct, it's useful for now. I've come to realize that doesn't really matter. Words is words and just words.
I've never experienced Caapi.
I do think that Ayahuasca is something which might be useful to me.
So my question ^^^
How do you experience the spirit/feeling/gestalt of Rue? Obviously masculine, but go deeper than that.
How does Rue Aya compare to Caapi Aya?
Let the words be yours, I'm done with mine.
Some background. I've only really used light doses of DMT, maybe medium. The "overlay" of visuals with eyes open in daytime has nearly obscured the "real" world, but not quite. I prefer darkness with eyes closed and I see houses and rooms, kinda.
Some has been straight DMT, some has been Passionflower change, and I have lately experimented with smoking Syrian Rue before the main course. (5-6 hits of Rue, enough to definitely feel). The Rue dramatically changes the experience.
At these doses of DMT, I've not seen any entities but I have experienced a "presence" a couple times. Pure DMT seems to at times have a "goddess" visitor. I've come to see the goddess as the feminine side of me. She's helped me get comfortable with my feminine side and see that I have a strong feminine side but that I really like being a guy. This is good shit to really feel instead of just think.
Passionflower, especially predosing, seems to be a nervous girl. Hiding in the background, trying to be helpful, but without a lot of strength or power.
I can't completely figure Rue out. Thus this post.
Rue seems kind of dark, reptilian, but at the same time a strong and powerful teacher. The first time I predosed with the Rue was the only time I really felt the presence. I heard in my head, over and over, "What about...?, what about...?" with what I didn't type being a very useful but difficult insight.
Rue almost seems like a demon at first, but it's not at all evil at second thought. Strong and dark and powerful, scary and maybe not even particularly benign, but not evil.
I'm throwing words at this without hitting the bullseye. I reserve the right to revise to better words if I can find them. But anyway...
Again, I'm not sure this attribution of independence to these feelings is at all correct, it's useful for now. I've come to realize that doesn't really matter. Words is words and just words.
I've never experienced Caapi.
I do think that Ayahuasca is something which might be useful to me.
So my question ^^^
How do you experience the spirit/feeling/gestalt of Rue? Obviously masculine, but go deeper than that.
How does Rue Aya compare to Caapi Aya?
Let the words be yours, I'm done with mine.