Hypersexuality and Western Culture

[Psilosopher?]

Is the western world hypersexual?

I think it is too hypersexual. Nowadays, the naked body is associated with sex. If you look at tribal cultures, most people were practically naked all the time. But none of the guys were rocking huge erections or preying after women. I think it's because they were not repressed at a young age. Children are impressionable. If they get the idea that nakedness is shameful or only for sexual pleasure (which ties into shame for many cultures), then they will believe these things. However, if they were comfortable with the idea of a human body, i think the converse will be true. They will only see a body as a body, a vessel for one's mind and spirit.

Also, a thing to mention is when people go to the extremes to get sexual pleasure. Masochism, costumes, bondage, BDSM etc. What inner struggles are these people going through for them to resort to such extreme measures? Often, a lot of people who like to be submissive are those in high stress positions or leadership positions. As one dominatrix put it, it's like they want to be put down in their place. This seems like a strange outlet, especially given how volatile the sexual pleasure/guilt response can be. I think anyone who has masturbated can attest to the feeling of futility of life or existence after blowing one's load. All the mojo is gone, and we go back to unfulfilling lives. What's the point of it, and why does the media constantly push hypersexual imagery down our throats?

Before anyone calls me judgemental, i don't really care what people do as long as they're not hurting anyone. I'm just stating some observations.

 

[syberdelic]

I think there is some truth to this concept but I also believe that most of our sexual problems in western society stems from sexual repression. Hypersexuality on it's own isn't too horrible a thing and can actually be healthy for some but when you combine it with deep repression such as exists in the Catholic Church, you end up with people expressing their sexuality in the most horrible ways.

 

[nexalizer]

I think anyone who has masturbated can attest to the feeling of futility of life or existence after blowing one's load. All the mojo is gone, and we go back to unfulfilling lives.

Some heavy projection there, my friend.

Futility is not a word I would use to describe post-orgasmic bliss.

Feels good man.


Interesting that you link "hypersexuality" to "sexual repression" and then talk about "masturbating and going back to unfulfilling lives" - wouldn't you say?

 

[nexalizer]

I think there is some truth to this concept but I also believe that most of our sexual problems in western society stems from sexual repression.

What "sexual problems" might these be?

 

[JustAnotherHuman]

Here's what I think of this whole issue: Are people in Western culture sexually repressed? To a degree. I think we still carry the vestiges of Victorian-era sensibilities, if only in a psychological sense. Kids can't talk about their sexual desires with their parents(at least not in all cases) , and the most kinkiest of sexual fantasies, things like BDSM and the like,(which I have no problem with BTW) are still taboo to some extent.

Does this repression lead to "hypersexuality" , to use your term Bodhi? Maybe. I think it's moar a case of people embracing their sexuality in response to thousands of years of repression. Again, I have no issue with this.

We're sexual creatures, and I think that this should be embraced. I think that the only time it becomes problematic is if people are getting hurt or betrayed, or if people are being unsafe.

 

[Psilosopher?]

Interesting that you link "hypersexuality" to "sexual repression" and then talk about "masturbating and going back to unfulfilling lives" - wouldn't you say?

I'm a very confused individual.

Here's what I think of this whole issue: Are people in Western culture sexually repressed? To a degree. I think we still carry the vestiges of Victorian-era sensibilities, if only in a psychological sense. Kids can't talk about their sexual desires with their parents(at least not in all cases) , and the most kinkiest of sexual fantasies, things like BDSM and the like,(which I have no problem with BTW) are still taboo to some extent.

Does this repression lead to "hypersexuality" , to use your term Bodhi? Maybe. I think it's moar a case of people embracing their sexuality in response to thousands of years of repression. Again, I have no issue with this.

We're sexual creatures, and I think that this should be embraced. I think that the only time it becomes problematic is if people are getting hurt or betrayed, or if people are being unsafe.

Exactly, we are sexual creatures. And we should embrace it. However, we don't talk about it as part of growing up. Some parents probably do, but it's not something that is seen as the norm. As a result, we don't know how to love. Go to any mainstream pornographic website. How many videos depict passionate love as opposed to the usual glorified masturbation using human toys (aka sex)? Most of it is the latter. This also causes men's sexual expectations to change.

 

[syberdelic]

There are three elements to what I see as the dysfunction of sexuality in modern western civilization.

1) We'll call this one hypersexuality: This is a free market thing. Sex sells. Sexuality is ingrained in our genetics so business people take advantage of it. Any time you see sexuality employed to sell a product or service, this concept is promoted and it has a significant and lasting impression on our society. It puts sexuality into places where it truly has no business and exposes people to a sexual charge that is often unwanted or even repulsive.

2) Sexual repression: Just like the war on drugs, this suppression of desires not only doesn't work, but causes a lot of unintended side effects and more damage than ever would have been caused by sex/drugs themselves. This causes people to see their normal sexual desires as deviant and/or evil. It causes people to seek out their desires and fetishes in the shadows and often in ways that harm others in order to keep their good name untarnished. Sexual repression just like the war on drugs turns good people into deviants and often criminals. This is the key reason why Priests molest and rape young boys.

3) Dominater culture: Many of you will be familiar with this as it is one of Terrance McKenna's central themes. We live in a culture that for thousands of years has celebrated dominance and this translates directly into sexuality. It is generally straight males who incorporate this dominant sexuality but only as a generalization. It is often a prerequisite to sexuality in straight males. This is not to be confused with BDSM as this requires a willing submissive partner. There is definitely some overlap between BDSM and dominator culture but one is not required for the other. A large portion of rapes and other sexual crimes have more to do with dominance than sexual gratification.

When taken together, these three elements make up the very toxic sexual landscape that we are all familiar with. I would agree that hypersexuality is a problem, but in the grand scheme of things, it is a minor problem that would be either minimized or eliminated without sexual repression and dominator culture. Without sexual repression, sexually charged advertisements would be much less effective at gaining our attention. Without dominator culture, sexual repression would have less of a purpose as this is just one more form of domination. This control over the thoughts of others is central to the concept of dominance.

As a side note, there are also three aspects to human sexuality;
1) physical sex
2) sexuality (dominant, submissive, masculine, feminine, or whatever makes one feel desirable)
3) sexual preference
There is a bell curve to all these concepts and the middle of the curve tends to favor a polorization but by no means are any of these black and white.

Sexuality is a complex thing and as our perspectives are less than ideal, it can be near impossible to wrap our heads around it. Anyway, I hope this helps people get a better understanding of it and maybe even put their own sexuality in a better light.

 

[hug46]

Interesting that you link "hypersexuality" to "sexual repression" and then talk about "masturbating and going back to unfulfilling lives" - wouldn't you say?

I think that if you are single and living in a society that values and promotes having a partner then yes, if you masturbate and then blow your wad, there is usually a comedown from the sexual desire that produced said climax. The comedown, coupled with the knowledge that one is single with no one to lie in bed to enjoy post coital bliss with, can lead to feelings of being unfulfilled. I think that it is pretty normal behaviour.

This is the key reason why Priests molest and rape young boys.

How does sexual repression lead priests to molest young boys? Wouldn't they have a proclivity
towards young boys even if they weren't repressed?

 

[syberdelic]

You have a good point. Pedophilia is probably more of a genetic abnormality that has no good solution other than maybe Manga. But my point is that repressing sexuality is like trying to manually hold the lid on a pressure cooker.

 

[Anamnesia]

Here is a solution to businesses using sexualized advertisements to sell you something: DON'T BUY IT.
If the product requires sexualized advertising to be sold then it doesn't deserve being bought, unless of course the thing you're buying is in fact a product used for sexual purposes.
I detest the fact that everywhere I look practically I'm confronted with a struggle to regain my attention after it's been hijacked by appealing to my core biological instincts. In in a way it's brilliant from a business perspective, but from a human perspective it's disgusting.

Buy nothing that has been promoted through sexualizing the advertising. That's my rule. To hell with this culture. Be sovereign with your own sexuality.

 

[nexalizer]

I think that if you are single and living in a society that values and promotes having a partner then yes, if you masturbate and then blow your wad, there is usually a comedown from the sexual desire that produced said climax.

The comedown is absolutely normal, I did not mean to imply otherwise.

By comedown I mean "ceasing of sexual desire", not a comedown in the crash sense like a stimulant.

The comedown, coupled with the knowledge that one is single with no one to lie in bed to enjoy post coital bliss with, can lead to feelings of being unfulfilled. I think that it is pretty normal behaviour.

I don't know that it is normal behavior or not, and I realize that it could lead to such feelings, but that really depends on the story you tell yourself.

Just because there's no one else there, it doesn't have to mean that there is something lacking - even though naturally I agree that the partnered variety is far more interesting - does that make sense?

 

[hug46]

The comedown, coupled with the knowledge that one is single with no one to lie in bed to enjoy post coital bliss with, can lead to feelings of being unfulfilled. I think that it is pretty normal behaviour.

I don't know that it is normal behavior or not, and I realize that it could lead to such feelings, but that really depends on the story you tell yourself.

Just because there's no one else there, it doesn't have to mean that there is something lacking - even though naturally I agree that the partnered variety is far more interesting - does that make sense?

Yes it makes sense to me and i myself do not feel that there is something lacking when going solo. I've had some great masterbates in my time. But this has not always been the case. Sometimes single people get lonely and i think that, in the spirit of the OP, that western culture feeds us an inordinate amount of bullshit on the art of sexual congress. Take masturbation for instance. The idea of a single male masturbating is considered lonely, sordid, shameful and a bit sad. I would be interested to hear how females feel about the masturbation/guilt thing.
We are also told who we should be having sex with, how we should be doing it, how often we should be having it, why we should be having it and whether we should be doing it alone, in a couple or a group setting..... the list goes on.

It's very easy to say that we should transcend this kind of conditioning but not everyone finds it that easy. I'm not surprised that Bodhisativa is confused. Hell, i am going to be 50 this year, have to fight the attentions of the local women off with a big stick and i'm still a bit confused about the whole procreation equation.

I have found that Europeans are generally a little more pragmatic about sex. Whereas English and Americans are generally a bit more messed up about it. But this is purely anecdotal evidence and may have no real truth to it.

 

[Koornut]

At the end of the day this is a bit of a one-sided conversation given the gender diversity of the nexus. Female sexuality operates under different laws of physics in my experience, with different triggers than the male counterparts.
I'd like to see what science says about the subject.

 

[nexalizer]

At the end of the day this is a bit of a one-sided conversation given the gender diversity of the nexus. Female sexuality operates under different laws of physics in my experience, with different triggers than the male counterparts.
I'd like to see what science says about the subject.

One sided in one dimension, not one sided in many more.

I don't review myself in any of the stuff you guys are saying, and I'm also from a Western (non anglo) country (in Europe).

If even half of this is true .. why stay wherever you are? Trust me, it gets a lot better in other places

 

[entheogenic-gnosis]

I think there is some truth to this concept but I also believe that most of our sexual problems in western society stems from sexual repression. Hypersexuality on it's own isn't too horrible a thing and can actually be healthy for some but when you combine it with deep repression such as exists in the Catholic Church, you end up with people expressing their sexuality in the most horrible ways.

This was my sentiment...

There was a rumour that in Victorian Times they would even cover the legs of furniture to keep one from having impure thoughts about "bare legs", and while there may not be much truth here it does demonstrate the perversion in the thinking of the sexually repressed.

Instead of something being normal, naturalized, and understood, it's treated like a "sin", and is suppressed, and suppression causes perversion.

People are conditioned to feel sex is evil, dark, and dirty, a "sin" that must be hidden, and a practice we must be ashamed of...and through this conditioning a warped view of sexuality is formed, where it becomes psychologically viewed in the same way as a secret drug habit, all this conditioning towards the sexual act causes perversions, and in a way modern culture has made sex into a perversion...

In the west, populations are exploited through their basic needs, desires, and fears. Sexuality has becoming a tool for manipulating consumers, and in this way it has become cheap and devalued, rather than something that should be seen as a beautiful expression of the deepest human love which produces life, it's been made out to be a cheap thrill...

With sexuality, culture (or the church) has always said "your sexuality is evil and should be repressed" so rather than exploring their sexuality in a healthy open manner, they suppress it, along with their bad habits, it becomes something "bad" in their psychology and thus it seems suitable to be connected to "bad" things...

It's a strange mix between a culture exploiting your sexual desires to push products, depicting sex as a cheap thrill with little value, and with the women being largely an object in the situation, and a moral cultural code of strict sexual suppression...

Sex is supposed to be the ultimate of sacred acts, it's an act which generates life, it is supposed to be the deepest expression of human connection and of love...

Creating life is serious.

Producing humans is an issue, the earth can not sustain an infinite number of humans, there are only so many resources at any given time, brining a child onto this earth should be done with great care, and by irresponsibly producing mass amounts of children you are producing mass amounts of human suffering... yet the "conservitives" take the opposite approach, Mike pence does not believe in condoms or birth control or abortion, and is de-funding programs helping these issues, this sexual suppression is actually far more detrimental than promiscuous sexuality.

I think the problem is clarity...

"If you charge off with some political agenda that is not informed by clarity, you are going to end up with business as usual. The road to hell is paved ... but it is not paved with clarity." ~ Terence McKenna.

This does not just apply to political agendas, it applies to every aspect of your existence, and this culture has a terribly unclear view regarding almost every aspect of itself, specially sexuality, and the result is the situation at hand.

-eg

 

[spacexplorer]

yeah there's constant sexual stimulation all around us, combine it with religious repression and a boring life and what else is there to do

 

[Hiyo Quicksilver]

As a lifelong pagan, there's a part of me that's confused by the wording, here... By "Western World", are we talking about the population of Western Hemisphere as a whole or just making generalizations?

If we're talking about all straight-laced freaks who fetishize (often violently) our sacred practices, then let's generalize away! But, honestly.. Anyone fortunate enough to have taken part in an actual ritual sacrifice of virginity might have a significantly different view of the term "hypersexual".. Especially if there are tryps involved.

Most people I've met who have escaped the madness of a monotheistic upbringing and sought fulfillment on their own terms are, by and large, happy, horny, smart, grounded, kind, gentle and sound-minded folk.

"Western Culture" isn't hypersexualized; It's neutered, spayed, geriatrically impotent and prepubescent all at once. The ruling classes have gelded the working class through guilt, domination and systematic emotional abuse, because they know that a sexually mature and truly self-actualized individual is a creative force that cannot be dominated... Well, unless that's something they're into...

Could it really be that all the "sexual problems" and frustrations you (OP) mention are the merely the fits of a hapless and godless rabble struggling against their own filthy, disgustingly primitive mammalian desire for the sins of the flesh?...

...Or could it be that somewhere, somewhen, some folks realized that by demonizing purest form of creation, they could stifle the creativity of anyone stupid enough to buy their book?

 

[syberdelic]

Yes, there is a lot of confusion about what exactly "western world" means. Here is what it means to me;

Eurocentric culture
Industrialized
Free market capitalism
Largely influenced by Christianity and/or Islam as opposed to eastern religions such as Buddhism, Hinduism, or Confucianism.

To me, western culture can be any of these things, but the more, the more western.

 

[Swayambhu]

Anyone fortunate enough to have taken part in an actual ritual sacrifice of virginity might have a significantly different view of the term "hypersexual".. Especially if there are tryps involved.

Interesting. I'm not very experienced in tryptamines. Quite inexperienced, actually, but nothing puts the kibosh on my sexuality like mushrooms.

Hypersexuality; Yes, this is a problem in our culture.
From advertising, to the way we dress, conduct or love/sex lives, to how we have children, to porn, often of varying degrees of violence, etc. etc.
Also, I perceive a tone of "I don't have sexual hangups, I'm totally free, and totally cool about everything" which I have long identified (yes, yes, call me a hater if you like) as being a line for sleazy lotharios and girls who are willing to fool themselves.
Likewise, I think it is delusional to imagine a culture where sexuality is not fetishized, even if that means through some degree of repression.
In my experience the few people I have met with happy, non-pathological no-strings-attached sex lives are enabled to be that way by some other psychological maladjustment (often seeming to stem from having an absent father, but I don't want to sound like a psychoanalyst).

There are excellent reasons for controlling who you have sex with and under which circumstances.
All cultures have failures, big ones, in how they manage this.
Ours is currently in a state of permissiveness which has given rise to unhealthy expressions.

 

[syberdelic]

I was going to have my significant other post in here for the female perspective, but she is not allowed yet...

She pretty much agrees with most of what's been said with the addition of a significant degree of fear in day to day life.