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LucidJ

LucidJ

Rising Star
:shock:

Greetings, I just found this place and it makes a very good first impression.

I'm lost. This world confuses me. It seems like half the time I am in some absurd dream where I worry about being "good" enough, making money, what people think of me... etc etc, and the other times, less often, in the moments between playing the person game, I am in a state of complete existential bewilderment. Amazed and abjectly shocked at my own apparent existence. Which is worse? Upwardly mobile Zombie or horrified awareness?

The zombie thing is not working out so well for me.... I have tried to be a good consumer drone but a part of me just wont accept the programing. Military, University, marriage... my soul is just not in it. At times I have felt like if I threw a stone at the sky it would shatter and the whole pretend world would fall. So what can I do, I guess I will go the other way. Anyone ever feel like the guy who knew too much for there own good?

So, anyway that's a little of me.

SWIM is placing an order for MHRB tomorrow, and is looking to share the journey with some people who get "it". He has some experience with altered states, OOBEs, psilocybin, saliva.. but now he thinks it's time to throw some rocks at the sky.
 
I'd say go for the horrified awareness. Let it boil for some years and it may become something beautiful. It's raw, but real. Learn to tame it.
 
Welcome!

You have a really interesting perspective of the world. Make sure you post back with pictures and stuff once SWIM extracts some lovely stuff :d
 
LucidJ said:
but now he thinks it's time to throw some rocks at the sky.
Click to expand...
I like this, quite a lot.

Looks like you know what you are getting into.
Best of wishes with your endeavours.
 
Welcome to the nexus from a fellow canuck!! If you throw rocks at the sky to shatter it, just be good and ready for what lies behind...:)

...and what falls on your head!8)

cheers,
JBArk
 
There are many things in this introduction I can relate to.
I hope the best for your future endeavors.

Good luck and have a happy journey! :)
 
At times I have felt like if I threw a stone at the sky it would shatter and the whole pretend world would fall.
Click to expand...

I know this feeling well. Sometimes it's hard for me to integrate what I've learned into reality.
A lot of times when I'm tripping I feel like my whole brain is firing up. As opposed to using only 10% of my brain. When I come out of it I feel kind of dumb because in the trip I can see anything in the universe and see every connection my mind has made to it. I can learn almost anything and I feel like I understand all. But, this cannot be in our reality. If we had this power in reality, then we wouldn't be able to go about our lives.
The best thing I find to do is, have digital recorder and talk once the trip is coming down. I remember at least twice as much later. Also, you'll have something to think about in 'zombie' world. Just remember that life is precious and you should live out your days with purpose. DMT taught me that.
 
Well the order has been placed now, so SWIM will Doc the extraction and first experience when it arrives. He's in for it now... *Gulp*
 
Your not alone in your views and feelings. Most of us have been there and somehow found our way to dmt. It changed my life and so many others. I hope it can do the same for you.
-safe voyages
 
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