Ahhh, I feel like Ive talked and talked about this stuff to the point of rediculousness. There have been times where I feel im done..nothing else to say..there are times where I I just sit there hunched over in such nauseated pain dry heaving, thinking that I want to swear the stuff off..this stuff is just NOT for the faint of heart. For everyone else its just going to be like going round after round witha jaguar if you choose to really do any real work with it.
I dont take bufotenine often anymore. I took it very often sometimes every day for many nights in a row while I was really studying the stuff. Now it's more a thing I come to here and there. lately everything has been about smoking DMT..some mushrooms and some ayahuasca..but smoked DMT with harmalas challenges me, destroys me, illuminates me and renews me to a whole new level..DMT and psilocybin are my 2 true lovers, no other substance has yet to make it's way into the erotic orgy that goes on between the 3 of us. I actaully concider psilocybin my first true love..above any in the flesh. What does that say about me?..I dont know??
I want to make this clear to everyone becasue reading posts like this it might sound like bufotenine is something that it isnt. I love bufotenine. I always will. But to me it is best as a healthy addition to my already commited relationship to my 2 lovers, psilocybin and DMT. Bufotenine is more like the old man that you visit here and there in your journey as apprentice, seeker of knowledge..but at the end of the day, it's your lover who is always there..right beside you..a life partner. Old man bufotenine can be harsh..he isnt interested in your erotic adventures or your sketchy-slowly decaying relationship with your best friend..he isnt here to convince you you've been an asshole you'r entire life to everyoneclose to you..he CAN do those things here and there..if you catch him in a forgiving mood..but it becomes increasingly clear there are better classes to attend if thats what you are looking for..Bufotenine has something else in mind..
Often I have layed there on my floor surrounded by a whirlpool of spirits, ears ringing with a piercing sting as my brain attempts to make sense of a frequence of which seems to come from an octave of hyperspace possible a bit farther down the spectrum from us than DMT hyperspace..I will wonder in horror..where is all the love? where is the insight? what the fuck is going on?
These are all things old man bufotenine seems to require you to bring with you. "Be prepared" might be his motto. Bufotenine is a warrior..and he expects you to be one as well. He can show you things that will blow your mind..doesnt mean he will stick around to sooth you're soul once hs finished and he doesnt care about dissolving your ego to make it any easier..he rather you just see this thing consciously..this is the warrior personality of bufotenine..there are no extra luxuries here..it just is what it is..it's raw..it can be painful..so pack you bags well..
..
About 2 weeks ago I drank a medium dose of caapi and mimosa..I lay there for the first hour like usual sort of surfing the edge of the caapi vision dreams that ten to arise at the onset for me..at the one hour point I smoked bufotenine evaporated onto 3x salvia with caapi extract and pure rue alkaloids..I actaully dont remember much about the onset of the experience but a few minutes in I was laying on my bed on my back, deep into a visionay world similar to an amaringo painting..I felt somewhat uncomforable and paranoid, somewhat nauseated from the bufotenine..there was a spinning sensation..unlike ive had before with ayahuasca. It was simiar to a drunken spinning but without the nausea and sickness associated with alcohol..I breathed and relaxed into it..the spinning actaully becasme sort of pleasant once I let it happen and I was carried off into the visionary dimension..I remember just sort of floating through all of these visions set against a black outer space sort of background..but the main vision I remember is that i was floating through this space on my back, looking up at the visions above me..all of a sudden there is ths jaguar there standing over me, looking into my eyes. I was not frightened. I was fully aware it was a vision and felt I could open my eys and st up at any time. The jaguar bagan liking my face and I swear to god I could feel it's tounge on my face as if it was actaully really there. It was a full on visual and tactile hallucination and it felt amazing..
So that was about 2 weeks ago. I decided to take bufotenine again 2 nights ago. I wanted to take some harmalas with it sublingually from a manske I did on rue, to test them out..but I decided to wait for another day to try them alone first and with mimosa. I smoked again a mixture of bufotenine evaporated onto 3x salvia with caapi extract and rue alkaloids from a mankse tek..and I smoke alot of it.
I took 3 really large hits..the first hit I nearly puked whle exhaling I took soo much..somehow I managedto take 2 more largehits and held both for as long as I could. By the time I put he pipe down and lay down with eyes closed there was the typical bufotenine grids..superimposed into the grid was a female entity sort of swimming around inside the grid looking down at me..this is ver very typical of bufotenine. I am never alone when I take bufotenine..these same beings always seem to be there right at the onset..sometimes I have evn been surrounded by young native men looking down at me as if I am laying on the ground near they're feet looking up at them. This never evokes much emotion at all though..it just is what it is..
So Im laying there with this familiar female being simming around inside the grid, and I know that I took alot and it is going to soon get very very deep since the onset seems twice as fast as usual. And deepen it does. It's almost as if the grid lowers itself down righ into my face and simultaniousily I pass through the thing, and my vision begins to spin a bit, and the movement starts. At the same time by body gets real heavy and uncomfortable. Next my body actaully goes numb as if it's under anesthetic. It all happens much much faster than usual and to a much greater extent. My mouth goes numb..I cant feel my teeth. I have to check my pulse to make sure Im still alive, but I can barely feel my hands enough to make out my pulse..heart is still beating strong..fast even..I am ok..
So I accept it and let go..all I can feel of my mouth now is a sort of black hole vortex(hard to explain the feeling) sort of pushing itself inward..maybe the salvia had something to do with that I dunno..Once I really just gve in and let go though it's like I am downloaded into this other dimesnion. I am foating there in it as strange symbols are flashing if full color, very rapidly all around me..By this point the visions and hallucinations are transforing from one to the other so rapidly I can only really acknowledge maybe 10% of them..its all just happening at light speed..as if a download is in process..and that's exactly what it is like..
I get the feeling that all of this is simply still a pre-breakthrough of sorts..when the natives take yopo, they take ALOT at times..and I really mean ALOT..probly 5 times what I took..and I took alot..It will become more apparent later why I really think this is still just the entrance into the true bufotenine hyperspace..
The problem here is the body load..I dont know how safe bufotenine is at doses like this..you really really have to accept it and just trust in the experience to be able to let go of your body in the face of what it feels like your body is going through..at some point though it does seem that the tingling and nausea and all that stuff just give way into an anesthetic like feeling on the body..so in this case thats a plus..
To get to this stage you have to really be committed to smoking alot of it as well despite the side effects at the onset..which are immediate after the first hit..you have to smoke more. This is what seperates the bufotenine trance from bufotenine hyperspace. When you hear people describe bufotenine as watching a movie..not involved in it..thats is the trance..that is a low dose..irreguardless of how visual it is..that is NOT bufotenine hyperspace. Bufotenine hyperspace is like another world..it replaces this one, and you are disembodied..like an OBE..
Ok, so I am sort of floating there, having now given up trying to keep any connection to my psysical form..Iam not egoless however, but it is hard to have a focussed thought..my thoughs are moving so rapidly, as if half dreaming, half lucid..a mind of they're own..and my thoughts almost come to life as visions..As all these symbols and images are flashing infront of my disembodied face, and suddenly its like one symbol appears and SNAP!..it locks into place and I am sucked into it.."wholy crap!" I am now thinking."im still comming up?"..surprised by that time that I can even think..
So this symbol that I am sucked into, it looked ancient..maybe arabic..maybe mayan I dunno I cant explain it..but once I got sucked into it it was like a room..fully 3d. Itis a reddish pink tint..and there was nothing at all sketchy or rough about the aesthetic of the "vision"..I have a hard time even referring to it as a vision. It was more like a vitual reality. It was crystal clear..nothing at all even remotely similar to the lower dose rough bufotenine visuals. This was definatily one of the cleanest and clearest visionary or whatever you wish to call it experiences I have ever had.. Each wall in the room had these symbols, one larg on on each wall..of the same nature as the other symbol..but differnt ones..they were not complex or anyhing like that..sort of just once big blocky symbol in the centre of each wall..and I was still comming up..
So Im facing what I guess is the back wall..and its like the wall behind me feels open to hyperspace, so really there is only 3 walls, a floor and a ceiling..Now I realize im still comming up becasue I start seeing these rapidly transforming symbols and images on the back wall..but in 3d..as if its now projecting holographic images in front of me..and what happened next astonished me..it was sort of trying to suck me into these scenes, but couldnt fully do it..I couldnt interface fully with the images and scenes so they remainded as 3d realistic holograpms..but not actaul envronments I was in..and becasue I couldnt fully intercalate into once of them, they remained in a state of rapid transformation..like possabilities..I was now peaking.
What was so facinating and astonshing about it was that some of them were actaul real life earth type scenes..while others were like other levels of hyperspace..I remember one of them that flashed through mymind for about 2 or 3 seconds was a little girl standing on a street corner beside this telephone pole..there were houses and everything..the details of the sidewalk..the ashfault road...it was muchmore realistic than watching a scene on a television..it was almost like really being there..but only almost since I was not fully sucked into any of these scenes..essentailly I stayed in this room..but somehow I knew that to go into those other places from this one place I had to take more bufotenine..which seems rediculous..but it's possible..it must be concidering how much the natives tend to take..
After a few minutes of that I started to come back down, but continued to hallucinated strongly in my dark room for another good 15 minutes..on the level of a solid mushroom or ayahuasca experience..but without the extreme mental warp and ecstatic feelings of either DMT or psilocybin..I was just sort of left there feelign a bit blown away..
After all the visuals stopped I redosed 2 times over the next hour while sitting at my computer listening to shulman..just light doses though. I actaully did get into a very very ecstatic psilocybinish state while sitting there with mellow closed eye goemetry..weird how bufotenine does that..It is always of a different quality when I redose..I really think that it metabolizes into something else in the body that is more empathic feeling and warm, but the best way to experience that stage of effects is to take a light redose after a heavy peak and go listen to some music..its not quite as nice as DMT and psilocybin though..but it is nice..thats not what this report was about though..
I dont take bufotenine often anymore. I took it very often sometimes every day for many nights in a row while I was really studying the stuff. Now it's more a thing I come to here and there. lately everything has been about smoking DMT..some mushrooms and some ayahuasca..but smoked DMT with harmalas challenges me, destroys me, illuminates me and renews me to a whole new level..DMT and psilocybin are my 2 true lovers, no other substance has yet to make it's way into the erotic orgy that goes on between the 3 of us. I actaully concider psilocybin my first true love..above any in the flesh. What does that say about me?..I dont know??
I want to make this clear to everyone becasue reading posts like this it might sound like bufotenine is something that it isnt. I love bufotenine. I always will. But to me it is best as a healthy addition to my already commited relationship to my 2 lovers, psilocybin and DMT. Bufotenine is more like the old man that you visit here and there in your journey as apprentice, seeker of knowledge..but at the end of the day, it's your lover who is always there..right beside you..a life partner. Old man bufotenine can be harsh..he isnt interested in your erotic adventures or your sketchy-slowly decaying relationship with your best friend..he isnt here to convince you you've been an asshole you'r entire life to everyoneclose to you..he CAN do those things here and there..if you catch him in a forgiving mood..but it becomes increasingly clear there are better classes to attend if thats what you are looking for..Bufotenine has something else in mind..
Often I have layed there on my floor surrounded by a whirlpool of spirits, ears ringing with a piercing sting as my brain attempts to make sense of a frequence of which seems to come from an octave of hyperspace possible a bit farther down the spectrum from us than DMT hyperspace..I will wonder in horror..where is all the love? where is the insight? what the fuck is going on?
These are all things old man bufotenine seems to require you to bring with you. "Be prepared" might be his motto. Bufotenine is a warrior..and he expects you to be one as well. He can show you things that will blow your mind..doesnt mean he will stick around to sooth you're soul once hs finished and he doesnt care about dissolving your ego to make it any easier..he rather you just see this thing consciously..this is the warrior personality of bufotenine..there are no extra luxuries here..it just is what it is..it's raw..it can be painful..so pack you bags well..
..
About 2 weeks ago I drank a medium dose of caapi and mimosa..I lay there for the first hour like usual sort of surfing the edge of the caapi vision dreams that ten to arise at the onset for me..at the one hour point I smoked bufotenine evaporated onto 3x salvia with caapi extract and pure rue alkaloids..I actaully dont remember much about the onset of the experience but a few minutes in I was laying on my bed on my back, deep into a visionay world similar to an amaringo painting..I felt somewhat uncomforable and paranoid, somewhat nauseated from the bufotenine..there was a spinning sensation..unlike ive had before with ayahuasca. It was simiar to a drunken spinning but without the nausea and sickness associated with alcohol..I breathed and relaxed into it..the spinning actaully becasme sort of pleasant once I let it happen and I was carried off into the visionary dimension..I remember just sort of floating through all of these visions set against a black outer space sort of background..but the main vision I remember is that i was floating through this space on my back, looking up at the visions above me..all of a sudden there is ths jaguar there standing over me, looking into my eyes. I was not frightened. I was fully aware it was a vision and felt I could open my eys and st up at any time. The jaguar bagan liking my face and I swear to god I could feel it's tounge on my face as if it was actaully really there. It was a full on visual and tactile hallucination and it felt amazing..
So that was about 2 weeks ago. I decided to take bufotenine again 2 nights ago. I wanted to take some harmalas with it sublingually from a manske I did on rue, to test them out..but I decided to wait for another day to try them alone first and with mimosa. I smoked again a mixture of bufotenine evaporated onto 3x salvia with caapi extract and rue alkaloids from a mankse tek..and I smoke alot of it.
I took 3 really large hits..the first hit I nearly puked whle exhaling I took soo much..somehow I managedto take 2 more largehits and held both for as long as I could. By the time I put he pipe down and lay down with eyes closed there was the typical bufotenine grids..superimposed into the grid was a female entity sort of swimming around inside the grid looking down at me..this is ver very typical of bufotenine. I am never alone when I take bufotenine..these same beings always seem to be there right at the onset..sometimes I have evn been surrounded by young native men looking down at me as if I am laying on the ground near they're feet looking up at them. This never evokes much emotion at all though..it just is what it is..
So Im laying there with this familiar female being simming around inside the grid, and I know that I took alot and it is going to soon get very very deep since the onset seems twice as fast as usual. And deepen it does. It's almost as if the grid lowers itself down righ into my face and simultaniousily I pass through the thing, and my vision begins to spin a bit, and the movement starts. At the same time by body gets real heavy and uncomfortable. Next my body actaully goes numb as if it's under anesthetic. It all happens much much faster than usual and to a much greater extent. My mouth goes numb..I cant feel my teeth. I have to check my pulse to make sure Im still alive, but I can barely feel my hands enough to make out my pulse..heart is still beating strong..fast even..I am ok..
So I accept it and let go..all I can feel of my mouth now is a sort of black hole vortex(hard to explain the feeling) sort of pushing itself inward..maybe the salvia had something to do with that I dunno..Once I really just gve in and let go though it's like I am downloaded into this other dimesnion. I am foating there in it as strange symbols are flashing if full color, very rapidly all around me..By this point the visions and hallucinations are transforing from one to the other so rapidly I can only really acknowledge maybe 10% of them..its all just happening at light speed..as if a download is in process..and that's exactly what it is like..
I get the feeling that all of this is simply still a pre-breakthrough of sorts..when the natives take yopo, they take ALOT at times..and I really mean ALOT..probly 5 times what I took..and I took alot..It will become more apparent later why I really think this is still just the entrance into the true bufotenine hyperspace..
The problem here is the body load..I dont know how safe bufotenine is at doses like this..you really really have to accept it and just trust in the experience to be able to let go of your body in the face of what it feels like your body is going through..at some point though it does seem that the tingling and nausea and all that stuff just give way into an anesthetic like feeling on the body..so in this case thats a plus..
To get to this stage you have to really be committed to smoking alot of it as well despite the side effects at the onset..which are immediate after the first hit..you have to smoke more. This is what seperates the bufotenine trance from bufotenine hyperspace. When you hear people describe bufotenine as watching a movie..not involved in it..thats is the trance..that is a low dose..irreguardless of how visual it is..that is NOT bufotenine hyperspace. Bufotenine hyperspace is like another world..it replaces this one, and you are disembodied..like an OBE..
Ok, so I am sort of floating there, having now given up trying to keep any connection to my psysical form..Iam not egoless however, but it is hard to have a focussed thought..my thoughs are moving so rapidly, as if half dreaming, half lucid..a mind of they're own..and my thoughts almost come to life as visions..As all these symbols and images are flashing infront of my disembodied face, and suddenly its like one symbol appears and SNAP!..it locks into place and I am sucked into it.."wholy crap!" I am now thinking."im still comming up?"..surprised by that time that I can even think..
So this symbol that I am sucked into, it looked ancient..maybe arabic..maybe mayan I dunno I cant explain it..but once I got sucked into it it was like a room..fully 3d. Itis a reddish pink tint..and there was nothing at all sketchy or rough about the aesthetic of the "vision"..I have a hard time even referring to it as a vision. It was more like a vitual reality. It was crystal clear..nothing at all even remotely similar to the lower dose rough bufotenine visuals. This was definatily one of the cleanest and clearest visionary or whatever you wish to call it experiences I have ever had.. Each wall in the room had these symbols, one larg on on each wall..of the same nature as the other symbol..but differnt ones..they were not complex or anyhing like that..sort of just once big blocky symbol in the centre of each wall..and I was still comming up..
So Im facing what I guess is the back wall..and its like the wall behind me feels open to hyperspace, so really there is only 3 walls, a floor and a ceiling..Now I realize im still comming up becasue I start seeing these rapidly transforming symbols and images on the back wall..but in 3d..as if its now projecting holographic images in front of me..and what happened next astonished me..it was sort of trying to suck me into these scenes, but couldnt fully do it..I couldnt interface fully with the images and scenes so they remainded as 3d realistic holograpms..but not actaul envronments I was in..and becasue I couldnt fully intercalate into once of them, they remained in a state of rapid transformation..like possabilities..I was now peaking.
What was so facinating and astonshing about it was that some of them were actaul real life earth type scenes..while others were like other levels of hyperspace..I remember one of them that flashed through mymind for about 2 or 3 seconds was a little girl standing on a street corner beside this telephone pole..there were houses and everything..the details of the sidewalk..the ashfault road...it was muchmore realistic than watching a scene on a television..it was almost like really being there..but only almost since I was not fully sucked into any of these scenes..essentailly I stayed in this room..but somehow I knew that to go into those other places from this one place I had to take more bufotenine..which seems rediculous..but it's possible..it must be concidering how much the natives tend to take..
After a few minutes of that I started to come back down, but continued to hallucinated strongly in my dark room for another good 15 minutes..on the level of a solid mushroom or ayahuasca experience..but without the extreme mental warp and ecstatic feelings of either DMT or psilocybin..I was just sort of left there feelign a bit blown away..
After all the visuals stopped I redosed 2 times over the next hour while sitting at my computer listening to shulman..just light doses though. I actaully did get into a very very ecstatic psilocybinish state while sitting there with mellow closed eye goemetry..weird how bufotenine does that..It is always of a different quality when I redose..I really think that it metabolizes into something else in the body that is more empathic feeling and warm, but the best way to experience that stage of effects is to take a light redose after a heavy peak and go listen to some music..its not quite as nice as DMT and psilocybin though..but it is nice..thats not what this report was about though..
