...i'm still very much here....just "came back" and wanted to try to share what i went/am going through right now.....
...so beautiful....a very deep journey....one of my deepest in recent memory...
about 30 minutes ago i went to say hello to my beautiful salvia plant. she told me it was time....i looked out the window and saw the rain and the wind blowing and within 10 seconds a large, powerful peal of thunder....the elements are alive. the heavens have a message....this is powerful...surrender to it...
i pick 3 HUGE leaves. they are the size of my hand....and i have very big hands...
i pray.
T+10 minutes and i feel her inside me. runs of dominoes all over me....vortexes of energy spinning all around me...it's hard to stand up with these cosmic forces making me twist and bend.
surrender....
she has me. i am had. so gentle.....i want to show her something....i go into my freezer and grab my jar of spiced weed...my glass spoon....my VG....and head into my room...
i put on "the eternal ohm" by robert slap and prepare.
two DEEP draws introduce my queen to my holy man and "the one who is friends with everyone"....weed is like that dream friend you can travel ANYWHERE with because he speaks the language no matter where you end up. the queen and the holy man acknowledge each other with respect and a seeming fondness for one another. my translator working with glee to translate between the four of us....the weed is good...so very good!
i am gone now. i am a part of a deeply textured painting...the wind blows through me and i ripple up to the top, over the edge and into a world of machines....
insectoid....alien...familiar. i am part of these. their colors are pastel pinks, tangerines....colors of peace. i am enraptured by the futuristic beauty.
wait a minute. i have a body. what about "me" back in the other world??
(me back in the other world responds) "oh my god...this is too intense...i've crossed a line...look for an escape....." terror doesn't exactly grip me..but i become aware of it's presence and potential....which...in turn...amplifies it's intensity exponentially.
i know the only answer is surrender....but things are starting to take on scary overtones....but..really...nothing has changed. just my PERCEPTION of it....my fear of surrendering to it lest i lose my "self" forever....it's more of a battle within than a threat from without..
in an instant i know what to do...in events of O.D.-style panic with Marijuana, Salvia, or DMT it is almost always a good idea to relax the left-brain and it's attempts to "rationalize" it's perceptions. the left-brain is where fear exists. the right-brain doesn't understand such constructs...
engage the right- brain. do something that is almost all right-brain....this will shift my vibration...this will bring about the change...
i sing. i sing a song that i have never heard prior. almost church-style hymn, i say only, "i am love and light".....the chorus builds....melodies follow...a capella vocal arrangements fly from a part somewhere inside of my soul. they are colors....they are water....i am "washing" this world. "clearing" my perception. i am in the deepest bliss.
i decide to try to open my eyes and find that i am still DEEPLY in hyperspace. the nexus between salvia's hyper-space and DMT's hyper-space...floating in a spaceship made out of marijuana. i decide to explore this world i "live" in a bit with my new set of eyes (see avatar).
deep bonding with my salvia plant and my jar of spiced weed! it's a little chilly outside.
I'M GONNA TAKE A HOT SHOWER!!!!!
i will just say that what i experienced in that shower was quite possibly one of the most transportational experiences of my life. hot steamy jungle rain pelting me as i stand beneath a giant banana tree. monkeys are at my feet and hanging from the stalk of this tree...one hands me a banana...
i'm back in my "here self" and i look at this bar of soap and mechanically use it.....
then i hand the banana back to the monkey...
i turn my back to a pair of warm hands and they are the hands of my love. she is massaging me..her hands are sooo warm!! i lean my head against the wall of the shower and it is a mirror now and she is looking at me from behind it. her hands are still behind me caressing me. i see the face of what i feel shall be my life partner. she is beautiful...brunette hair....deep, compassionate brown eyes....a sense of calm and tranquility...i am smitten beyond words..
so much more but i'll leave it at that for now
i am so moved by this experience. the combination of 3 leaves of salvia picked and instantly chewed up slowly, about .020 spice infused into a bowlful of extremely potent sativa and vaporized twice to get it all in....
this was powerful my family. i'm still shaking a little...even now after just over an hour!! MANY BLESSINGS!
LOVE AND GRATITUDE!!
...so beautiful....a very deep journey....one of my deepest in recent memory...
about 30 minutes ago i went to say hello to my beautiful salvia plant. she told me it was time....i looked out the window and saw the rain and the wind blowing and within 10 seconds a large, powerful peal of thunder....the elements are alive. the heavens have a message....this is powerful...surrender to it...
i pick 3 HUGE leaves. they are the size of my hand....and i have very big hands...
i pray.
T+10 minutes and i feel her inside me. runs of dominoes all over me....vortexes of energy spinning all around me...it's hard to stand up with these cosmic forces making me twist and bend.
surrender....
she has me. i am had. so gentle.....i want to show her something....i go into my freezer and grab my jar of spiced weed...my glass spoon....my VG....and head into my room...
i put on "the eternal ohm" by robert slap and prepare.
two DEEP draws introduce my queen to my holy man and "the one who is friends with everyone"....weed is like that dream friend you can travel ANYWHERE with because he speaks the language no matter where you end up. the queen and the holy man acknowledge each other with respect and a seeming fondness for one another. my translator working with glee to translate between the four of us....the weed is good...so very good!
i am gone now. i am a part of a deeply textured painting...the wind blows through me and i ripple up to the top, over the edge and into a world of machines....
insectoid....alien...familiar. i am part of these. their colors are pastel pinks, tangerines....colors of peace. i am enraptured by the futuristic beauty.
wait a minute. i have a body. what about "me" back in the other world??
(me back in the other world responds) "oh my god...this is too intense...i've crossed a line...look for an escape....." terror doesn't exactly grip me..but i become aware of it's presence and potential....which...in turn...amplifies it's intensity exponentially.
i know the only answer is surrender....but things are starting to take on scary overtones....but..really...nothing has changed. just my PERCEPTION of it....my fear of surrendering to it lest i lose my "self" forever....it's more of a battle within than a threat from without..
in an instant i know what to do...in events of O.D.-style panic with Marijuana, Salvia, or DMT it is almost always a good idea to relax the left-brain and it's attempts to "rationalize" it's perceptions. the left-brain is where fear exists. the right-brain doesn't understand such constructs...
engage the right- brain. do something that is almost all right-brain....this will shift my vibration...this will bring about the change...
i sing. i sing a song that i have never heard prior. almost church-style hymn, i say only, "i am love and light".....the chorus builds....melodies follow...a capella vocal arrangements fly from a part somewhere inside of my soul. they are colors....they are water....i am "washing" this world. "clearing" my perception. i am in the deepest bliss.
i decide to try to open my eyes and find that i am still DEEPLY in hyperspace. the nexus between salvia's hyper-space and DMT's hyper-space...floating in a spaceship made out of marijuana. i decide to explore this world i "live" in a bit with my new set of eyes (see avatar).
deep bonding with my salvia plant and my jar of spiced weed! it's a little chilly outside.
I'M GONNA TAKE A HOT SHOWER!!!!!
i will just say that what i experienced in that shower was quite possibly one of the most transportational experiences of my life. hot steamy jungle rain pelting me as i stand beneath a giant banana tree. monkeys are at my feet and hanging from the stalk of this tree...one hands me a banana...
i'm back in my "here self" and i look at this bar of soap and mechanically use it.....
then i hand the banana back to the monkey...
i turn my back to a pair of warm hands and they are the hands of my love. she is massaging me..her hands are sooo warm!! i lean my head against the wall of the shower and it is a mirror now and she is looking at me from behind it. her hands are still behind me caressing me. i see the face of what i feel shall be my life partner. she is beautiful...brunette hair....deep, compassionate brown eyes....a sense of calm and tranquility...i am smitten beyond words..
so much more but i'll leave it at that for now
i am so moved by this experience. the combination of 3 leaves of salvia picked and instantly chewed up slowly, about .020 spice infused into a bowlful of extremely potent sativa and vaporized twice to get it all in....
this was powerful my family. i'm still shaking a little...even now after just over an hour!! MANY BLESSINGS!
LOVE AND GRATITUDE!!
