kaywhyellay
powdered bliss
Hello, first post first topic first lots of things,
I've been testing the waters with psychedelics for a couple years now, my trips sprinkled sparsely few between yet
I found myself deeply moved by my experiences, maybe more so than my mates or most people I've talked to
I've done DMT once, mushrooms 4-5 times and acid three times, my last experience maybe a little too heavy for my tastes
Started out a wonderful eerie cold November day, gray skies and sulky yellowing clouds
with a friend of mine tripping for his first time while I was on three tabs
walking around wrapped up in sweaters on the school campus where I lived, near the river, was beautiful
Shuffling through piles of dead leaves is the most comforting feeling, like a blanket for the long winter ahead
Walked back to my place while peaking, I was in bed listening to music and I got lost in my own head
seeing something that tipped me over a dreamy ledge
I lost my balance went a little psychotic for several hours (whatever that means)
first everything stopped making sense
the words that were coming out of our mouths started blah blah blahing and I couldn't stop laughing
then all matter of air and space and light started turning into little cascading spirals of color, like those little styrofoam s's
infinitely individual s's just streaming into grooves and pulsations and I became intimately aware of my connection with the whole room
became that soft breathing machine and I was just floating in this huge white duvet breathing with the whole room
the mural on my wall alive and screaming my name in living colors, kaywhyellay you are everything
My friend was on the phone talking to his friend who is very experienced with mushrooms laughing
and a series of visions haunted my head
about the nature of my life, my family abstractedly represented to me as my friends
etc
and I saw my friend in the room with me, morphing into me a male version of me beautifully carved and
like a puppet my mind used him to talk to me
gone and not caring about tying myself down I began to come down into this dreamy surreality, the bindings of my mind tapering down ideas that were not necessarily designed to support a reality acceptable to society (??)
Anyways I pissed myself
and he not nearly tripping as much as me
trying to ground himself wondering what is she up to
I pull him into another room, strip him down and begin to you know (what is the policy on this site anyway pg 13)
Just down to my basic circuits, satisfying every whim with no concept of society rules consequences
He says stop and I laugh off and tell him to eff off
Pretty naked at this point,
Run into my roomies bedroom, curled up in a ball in his bed, until he gets home
My friend tripping balls tells him some kind of story, my roomie isn't very impressed, but I was too preoccupied with what the colors were telling me
and this dreamtime misalinged surreality to care
I run back into my bedroom
projectile vomiting
wrapped up in my pisssoaked duvet and sheets
Until I come to my senses and realize that
Something wasn't right
and pop snapped back into place and it felt like a dream?
What to think what to feel what meaning to glean from this shpiel?
Originally for months after I convinced myself that I was crazy but
I had learned a lot that I couldn't express or explain
that I remember so clearly and other things not so clearly, like
where was I when I was not 'sane'
I was reminded of this tentative touching with another sphere of realization the first time I smoked DMT, a couple months ago, which I may describe in another post, not that it was nearly as scary, my thoughts were just similar in scope
But I just wanted to get some of this down once and for all
Maybe to ask if there is anything you can tell me about what happened, where I was going, what I was living in those fleeting hours of dreamy surreality
eternally
Kaywhyellay(essaich)
I've been testing the waters with psychedelics for a couple years now, my trips sprinkled sparsely few between yet
I found myself deeply moved by my experiences, maybe more so than my mates or most people I've talked to
I've done DMT once, mushrooms 4-5 times and acid three times, my last experience maybe a little too heavy for my tastes
Started out a wonderful eerie cold November day, gray skies and sulky yellowing clouds
with a friend of mine tripping for his first time while I was on three tabs
walking around wrapped up in sweaters on the school campus where I lived, near the river, was beautiful
Shuffling through piles of dead leaves is the most comforting feeling, like a blanket for the long winter ahead
Walked back to my place while peaking, I was in bed listening to music and I got lost in my own head
seeing something that tipped me over a dreamy ledge
I lost my balance went a little psychotic for several hours (whatever that means)
first everything stopped making sense
the words that were coming out of our mouths started blah blah blahing and I couldn't stop laughing
then all matter of air and space and light started turning into little cascading spirals of color, like those little styrofoam s's
infinitely individual s's just streaming into grooves and pulsations and I became intimately aware of my connection with the whole room
became that soft breathing machine and I was just floating in this huge white duvet breathing with the whole room
the mural on my wall alive and screaming my name in living colors, kaywhyellay you are everything
My friend was on the phone talking to his friend who is very experienced with mushrooms laughing
and a series of visions haunted my head
about the nature of my life, my family abstractedly represented to me as my friends
etc
and I saw my friend in the room with me, morphing into me a male version of me beautifully carved and
like a puppet my mind used him to talk to me
gone and not caring about tying myself down I began to come down into this dreamy surreality, the bindings of my mind tapering down ideas that were not necessarily designed to support a reality acceptable to society (??)
Anyways I pissed myself
and he not nearly tripping as much as me
trying to ground himself wondering what is she up to
I pull him into another room, strip him down and begin to you know (what is the policy on this site anyway pg 13)
Just down to my basic circuits, satisfying every whim with no concept of society rules consequences
He says stop and I laugh off and tell him to eff off
Pretty naked at this point,
Run into my roomies bedroom, curled up in a ball in his bed, until he gets home
My friend tripping balls tells him some kind of story, my roomie isn't very impressed, but I was too preoccupied with what the colors were telling me
and this dreamtime misalinged surreality to care
I run back into my bedroom
projectile vomiting
wrapped up in my pisssoaked duvet and sheets
Until I come to my senses and realize that
Something wasn't right
and pop snapped back into place and it felt like a dream?
What to think what to feel what meaning to glean from this shpiel?
Originally for months after I convinced myself that I was crazy but
I had learned a lot that I couldn't express or explain
that I remember so clearly and other things not so clearly, like
where was I when I was not 'sane'
I was reminded of this tentative touching with another sphere of realization the first time I smoked DMT, a couple months ago, which I may describe in another post, not that it was nearly as scary, my thoughts were just similar in scope
But I just wanted to get some of this down once and for all
Maybe to ask if there is anything you can tell me about what happened, where I was going, what I was living in those fleeting hours of dreamy surreality
eternally
Kaywhyellay(essaich)
