My first instinct was to say "Stay away as well."

I think however since you are 41, you can do what you like in your free time.

and asking for help and advise here is a good start. I think you have a good outlook on it. you said you think you need

to let your self loose control, and with these tools i think thats possible. I have to say though not all experiences

are delightful lessons. when i first experimented with psychedelics i had some intense hard lessons about how much of a

piece of scum i was. I had to go through some personal transformations, and these things helped. not easy though.

I still feel like Im going to have a panic attack before i smoke spice LOL.