You and I have had similar experiences. I smoke with my dad and he got into legal trouble. I was like you were. A few years ago I had a close death and I started looking for an escape in some mind altering chemicals. Now, I feel my life has improved much more. A big help in that were the ego-shattering mushroom and DMT trips. When DMT breaks down your life, you'll see exactly how you fit into the universe. I know it has helped me in a lot of ways, you just need to be prepared though.