shishigami
Rising Star
The first one.
T+0.00: Shrooms 1/16 oz
T+3:35 Two whippets
Weight: 125 lbs
Gender: Male
Prior substance use: Marijuana, Alcohol, Kratom, Nitrous. None in the past week.
After the entire ordeal of getting the shrooms for the first time, driving an hour into Chicago to pick them up significantly later than I expected and my dad finding out what I needed the car for, I was excited for my first time. Picked M up at 6.40 and arrived at my house at 6.50. We were going to weigh them out to make sure I didn’t get ripped off but I realized it didn’t matter since I didn’t have the dealer’s number or any desire to go on another two hour road trip for a lil’ bit of shrooms. Usually I try to keep track of the time but I really have no clue so I’m not even going to guess. Also I’m not going to really describe the visuals because a theme of this trip was that words are ridiculously inadequate.
T+0.00 (6.55): Neither of us had eaten for a few hours. We estimated what was half, checked for OJ (we had none) and chewed. We were both surprised that they didn’t taste bad. M swallowed his pretty quick but I chewed for a good 10 min before rinsing them down with water. We went outside to build a fire and decided to walk around to pass the time.
I noticed that lights were kind of glowing and wasn’t sure if it was just my mind or not. We got to the rose garden and I could definitely tell I was starting to feel it: everything looked great. We continued walking towards the lake and the lights on all the passing cars were incredibly fascinating. I felt like we had been walking forever and was surprised that I was feeling it as much as I was. The streetlights had a really nice blue around them and looked like flowers.
We arrived at the lake. The reflection of the city skyline looked incredible, just glistening. I was finding it a bit hard to walk and we sat on a bench, the woodchips looked like they were breathing. We continued walking around and found M’s boat. The lights on the water and sand were magnificent. It was getting hard to articulate things because thoughts were coming too quickly.
I began to get a bit overwhelmed and wanted to start walking home. I hadn’t planned for this long of a walk and was annoyed that we were 30 minutes away from my house and I was peaking. As we started to walk it began to rain and I remember being very cold. Later I realized that the people we passed made me feel like I was Ellen Page’s character in Inception, when everyone in the dream knows she does not belong.
We walked over a ridge and saw my elementary school; I felt this wave of relief. We arrived at my school. Sometime earlier I had taken my hat off because I wanted to protect in from the rain and M found this very amusing. M found a hat for himself which happened to match his shirt very well. We got to my house and were happy to see that the fire had survived the rain. We went in got some food and started thinking.
I was amazed at the fact that humans are so diverse and that even if we are eating we can be unsatisfied with the taste. I pointed out that amoebas will always be satisfied with food yet humans won’t be. We realized how inadequate words are at describing feelings and how circular all definitions are. Describing feelings is like describing colors.
The wooden table glowed and melted and the apple on it shined magnificently. I felt as my body under the blanket I was wearing didn’t exist because I couldn’t see it. I felt all tingly and fantastic. We cleaned everything off put the apple in the middle and went upstairs to look up the definition of thinking. We continued talking and being frustrated with words until my sister poked her head in. We found her a bit sinister, out of the bubble, yet fascinating.
I did my two balloons of nitrous, and found them rather underwhelming compared to nitrous and weed. I was expecting something really great but realized it was probably too late in the trip to have done them. I was frustrated because I realized most of my visuals were gone and I almost reached a breaking point with the nitrous but didn’t. Something fascinating was just within my grasp. We sat around in the dark for a little bit and then went upstairs to watch Fantastic Mr. Fox.
We turned on the TV and saw the final minutes of Mizzou upset Oklahoma. We were intrigued by the game and both unhappy that the coaches were so angry. My dad came up and talked to us about his night and we started watching the movie. The animation was surreal and I felt really in touch with the animal characters. By the time the movie ended, which was approximately six hours after ingestion, I was down except for the tingly feeling in hands.
This was a very nice first experience with a substance I would most definitely use again. I was surprised by how mental it was. Next time I think I could stand being away from home but it was very comforting for the first time, to know that if I start freaking out I can always curl up in my bed.
And the second one.
T+0.00: 1/16 oz Shrooms
Weight: 128 lbs
Gender: Male
Prior substance use: Marijuana, Alcohol, Kratom, Nitrous, Shrooms, DMT. No use in the past week.
So tonight was the night that I would be doing shrooms for the second time. It was my friends Z and A’s first time and they were really excited. We were warned that they were potent but I wasn’t really expecting them to be as potent as they were. I had not eaten for 7 hours prior to this, Z hadn’t for 4, and A hadn’t for 3. In retrospect I should have considered the setting more carefully.
T+0.00 (6.42): I let Z and A know that I would be chewing mine for about five minutes in an attempt to have them hit quicker. Z did too but A did not, he couldn’t stand the taste. We bundled out and headed outside, my parents were home and I did not want to be there. It wasn’t too cold when we got outside, maybe around 30, but there was lots of snow on the ground.
T+0.20: I was first noticing an alteration in the lights. Just a little bit more glow to them.
T+0.40: Z was noticing it too. A was annoyed that he wasn’t noticing them.
T+0.60: Z was still talking. A lot, all the time.
T+1.20: A was really starting to notice things. We passed a house that looked very much like a gingerbread house, it was enticing and I really wanted to go knock on the door. Our depth perception made it feel like we were in a 3D movie. After that we stared at this old stone wall which moved and swayed in the most intriguing way.
The times are not recorded after this one for about an hour.
T+1.30: Arrived at the lake. A started peaking and was really just enjoying himself. Z started talking about dimensions and some other weird stuff. There were these epic mountainous orange clouds in the sky. Orion’s belt was twinkling blue and red and there were an odd number of planes in the sky, all of them coming out of the cloud. It was great. We chilled watching the water for a while and listening to the roar of the waves and enjoying ourselves. I really wanted to sit down but it was getting kind of cold and there was lots of snow on the ground. Staring up at the sky was fantastic. A and I were annoyed Z had his phone out. He wouldn’t put it away and just kept on texting people, A and I had agreed to turn ours off before the trip even began.
We continued walking on the lakefront and we saw three girls swinging in a park. I wanted to go talk to them so we walked and they said hello. Z said in a very odd voice “I can’t really see who you are, who are you?” and then he and A ran off. I decided to follow. We sat down at a bathroom on the lakefront and just stared at a tree for a while. Z kept on texting which was not really annoying me. It was really cold. I talked with A about how he was feeling and he was still really enjoying himself. Z kept on babbling about dimensions, Russia, and Japan. He made no sense and, in general, was not a particularly useful part of our trio. Here’s a text he sent
“Fuck dude you’re in dimensions four and five and I can only look on the edge, on the axis with Russia. Japan is above wilmette. I am so jealous. Goodbye”
I kid you not, it was that bad. In case you were wondering, the second dimension was sober, the third was on shrooms, the fourth was the lake we were by, and the fifth was god. So Z said the people he texted were in the lake and god. I don’t know what the locations had to do with it. I asked him about it later and he told me that he was saying what was true to him at the time. I also noticed that there was some ego dissolution. I had completely forgotten about the outside world, about anything outside of where I was. It was unexpected
T+2.40: A and I stared at this fantastic tree while Z rolled around before coming to the conclusion that we needed someone to pick us up. We were freezing our asses off at this point and Z was still really fucked up. So we called my friend S who wasn’t all too happy to pick us up and went over to his house. We were starting to come down a little bit, from the visual to the only mental part, and I could hold a conversation. Z was talking about not wanting to leave dimension 3 and A was saying he didn’t want it to end. Stuff was moving really slow, and my body was all tingly. I had a hard time doing anything with my body, telling if I was holding a phone, if my hand was in a pocket, stuff like that. S pointed out that if he had seen Z on the street he would have called the cops.
T+3.40: At this point we were no longer “tripping” but still under the influence. We went to a café, met up with some more friends and just chilled the rest of the night.
The cold and Z just made it feel like this trip was a “let’s get fucked up trip” not a “let’s explore our consciousness trip.” I didn’t particularly like this, and although the shrooms were great, the entire experience could have been much better.
Anyway here’s A’s poem about the experience
Can I say more?
Can I talk faster?
I can stand as it steps
closer
louder
gaze while the mountains tower
monstrous and looming
like a cloud curtain.
A new sky
half blue
half amber.
It comes.
Its crashing waves
on the snow covered beach
I fall down.
I look up.
Little sparklers
on the path
glinting
gleaming.
They stand with me
call my attention
like ringing
ascending
proceeding.
Catching my gaze
playing my ear
caressing my weary thoughts.
I look down
swirling
rippling landscapes
morphing underneath my feet
moving.
A journey.
Once red, once green
bittersweet is the end.
I stand at attention with my staff.
Slashing the ground
making my mark.
Remember this place.
Come back again.
I stand on the edge
check right, check left
all clear.
I fall in.
I wake up.
I realize they're long but I'd appreciate it I could know what you guys think.
T+0.00: Shrooms 1/16 oz
T+3:35 Two whippets
Weight: 125 lbs
Gender: Male
Prior substance use: Marijuana, Alcohol, Kratom, Nitrous. None in the past week.
After the entire ordeal of getting the shrooms for the first time, driving an hour into Chicago to pick them up significantly later than I expected and my dad finding out what I needed the car for, I was excited for my first time. Picked M up at 6.40 and arrived at my house at 6.50. We were going to weigh them out to make sure I didn’t get ripped off but I realized it didn’t matter since I didn’t have the dealer’s number or any desire to go on another two hour road trip for a lil’ bit of shrooms. Usually I try to keep track of the time but I really have no clue so I’m not even going to guess. Also I’m not going to really describe the visuals because a theme of this trip was that words are ridiculously inadequate.
T+0.00 (6.55): Neither of us had eaten for a few hours. We estimated what was half, checked for OJ (we had none) and chewed. We were both surprised that they didn’t taste bad. M swallowed his pretty quick but I chewed for a good 10 min before rinsing them down with water. We went outside to build a fire and decided to walk around to pass the time.
I noticed that lights were kind of glowing and wasn’t sure if it was just my mind or not. We got to the rose garden and I could definitely tell I was starting to feel it: everything looked great. We continued walking towards the lake and the lights on all the passing cars were incredibly fascinating. I felt like we had been walking forever and was surprised that I was feeling it as much as I was. The streetlights had a really nice blue around them and looked like flowers.
We arrived at the lake. The reflection of the city skyline looked incredible, just glistening. I was finding it a bit hard to walk and we sat on a bench, the woodchips looked like they were breathing. We continued walking around and found M’s boat. The lights on the water and sand were magnificent. It was getting hard to articulate things because thoughts were coming too quickly.
I began to get a bit overwhelmed and wanted to start walking home. I hadn’t planned for this long of a walk and was annoyed that we were 30 minutes away from my house and I was peaking. As we started to walk it began to rain and I remember being very cold. Later I realized that the people we passed made me feel like I was Ellen Page’s character in Inception, when everyone in the dream knows she does not belong.
We walked over a ridge and saw my elementary school; I felt this wave of relief. We arrived at my school. Sometime earlier I had taken my hat off because I wanted to protect in from the rain and M found this very amusing. M found a hat for himself which happened to match his shirt very well. We got to my house and were happy to see that the fire had survived the rain. We went in got some food and started thinking.
I was amazed at the fact that humans are so diverse and that even if we are eating we can be unsatisfied with the taste. I pointed out that amoebas will always be satisfied with food yet humans won’t be. We realized how inadequate words are at describing feelings and how circular all definitions are. Describing feelings is like describing colors.
The wooden table glowed and melted and the apple on it shined magnificently. I felt as my body under the blanket I was wearing didn’t exist because I couldn’t see it. I felt all tingly and fantastic. We cleaned everything off put the apple in the middle and went upstairs to look up the definition of thinking. We continued talking and being frustrated with words until my sister poked her head in. We found her a bit sinister, out of the bubble, yet fascinating.
I did my two balloons of nitrous, and found them rather underwhelming compared to nitrous and weed. I was expecting something really great but realized it was probably too late in the trip to have done them. I was frustrated because I realized most of my visuals were gone and I almost reached a breaking point with the nitrous but didn’t. Something fascinating was just within my grasp. We sat around in the dark for a little bit and then went upstairs to watch Fantastic Mr. Fox.
We turned on the TV and saw the final minutes of Mizzou upset Oklahoma. We were intrigued by the game and both unhappy that the coaches were so angry. My dad came up and talked to us about his night and we started watching the movie. The animation was surreal and I felt really in touch with the animal characters. By the time the movie ended, which was approximately six hours after ingestion, I was down except for the tingly feeling in hands.
This was a very nice first experience with a substance I would most definitely use again. I was surprised by how mental it was. Next time I think I could stand being away from home but it was very comforting for the first time, to know that if I start freaking out I can always curl up in my bed.
And the second one.
T+0.00: 1/16 oz Shrooms
Weight: 128 lbs
Gender: Male
Prior substance use: Marijuana, Alcohol, Kratom, Nitrous, Shrooms, DMT. No use in the past week.
So tonight was the night that I would be doing shrooms for the second time. It was my friends Z and A’s first time and they were really excited. We were warned that they were potent but I wasn’t really expecting them to be as potent as they were. I had not eaten for 7 hours prior to this, Z hadn’t for 4, and A hadn’t for 3. In retrospect I should have considered the setting more carefully.
T+0.00 (6.42): I let Z and A know that I would be chewing mine for about five minutes in an attempt to have them hit quicker. Z did too but A did not, he couldn’t stand the taste. We bundled out and headed outside, my parents were home and I did not want to be there. It wasn’t too cold when we got outside, maybe around 30, but there was lots of snow on the ground.
T+0.20: I was first noticing an alteration in the lights. Just a little bit more glow to them.
T+0.40: Z was noticing it too. A was annoyed that he wasn’t noticing them.
T+0.60: Z was still talking. A lot, all the time.
T+1.20: A was really starting to notice things. We passed a house that looked very much like a gingerbread house, it was enticing and I really wanted to go knock on the door. Our depth perception made it feel like we were in a 3D movie. After that we stared at this old stone wall which moved and swayed in the most intriguing way.
The times are not recorded after this one for about an hour.
T+1.30: Arrived at the lake. A started peaking and was really just enjoying himself. Z started talking about dimensions and some other weird stuff. There were these epic mountainous orange clouds in the sky. Orion’s belt was twinkling blue and red and there were an odd number of planes in the sky, all of them coming out of the cloud. It was great. We chilled watching the water for a while and listening to the roar of the waves and enjoying ourselves. I really wanted to sit down but it was getting kind of cold and there was lots of snow on the ground. Staring up at the sky was fantastic. A and I were annoyed Z had his phone out. He wouldn’t put it away and just kept on texting people, A and I had agreed to turn ours off before the trip even began.
We continued walking on the lakefront and we saw three girls swinging in a park. I wanted to go talk to them so we walked and they said hello. Z said in a very odd voice “I can’t really see who you are, who are you?” and then he and A ran off. I decided to follow. We sat down at a bathroom on the lakefront and just stared at a tree for a while. Z kept on texting which was not really annoying me. It was really cold. I talked with A about how he was feeling and he was still really enjoying himself. Z kept on babbling about dimensions, Russia, and Japan. He made no sense and, in general, was not a particularly useful part of our trio. Here’s a text he sent
“Fuck dude you’re in dimensions four and five and I can only look on the edge, on the axis with Russia. Japan is above wilmette. I am so jealous. Goodbye”
I kid you not, it was that bad. In case you were wondering, the second dimension was sober, the third was on shrooms, the fourth was the lake we were by, and the fifth was god. So Z said the people he texted were in the lake and god. I don’t know what the locations had to do with it. I asked him about it later and he told me that he was saying what was true to him at the time. I also noticed that there was some ego dissolution. I had completely forgotten about the outside world, about anything outside of where I was. It was unexpected
T+2.40: A and I stared at this fantastic tree while Z rolled around before coming to the conclusion that we needed someone to pick us up. We were freezing our asses off at this point and Z was still really fucked up. So we called my friend S who wasn’t all too happy to pick us up and went over to his house. We were starting to come down a little bit, from the visual to the only mental part, and I could hold a conversation. Z was talking about not wanting to leave dimension 3 and A was saying he didn’t want it to end. Stuff was moving really slow, and my body was all tingly. I had a hard time doing anything with my body, telling if I was holding a phone, if my hand was in a pocket, stuff like that. S pointed out that if he had seen Z on the street he would have called the cops.
T+3.40: At this point we were no longer “tripping” but still under the influence. We went to a café, met up with some more friends and just chilled the rest of the night.
The cold and Z just made it feel like this trip was a “let’s get fucked up trip” not a “let’s explore our consciousness trip.” I didn’t particularly like this, and although the shrooms were great, the entire experience could have been much better.
Anyway here’s A’s poem about the experience
Can I say more?
Can I talk faster?
I can stand as it steps
closer
louder
gaze while the mountains tower
monstrous and looming
like a cloud curtain.
A new sky
half blue
half amber.
It comes.
Its crashing waves
on the snow covered beach
I fall down.
I look up.
Little sparklers
on the path
glinting
gleaming.
They stand with me
call my attention
like ringing
ascending
proceeding.
Catching my gaze
playing my ear
caressing my weary thoughts.
I look down
swirling
rippling landscapes
morphing underneath my feet
moving.
A journey.
Once red, once green
bittersweet is the end.
I stand at attention with my staff.
Slashing the ground
making my mark.
Remember this place.
Come back again.
I stand on the edge
check right, check left
all clear.
I fall in.
I wake up.
I realize they're long but I'd appreciate it I could know what you guys think.