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Namaste, from a child.

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kalvish

kalvish

mushin
Hi the Nexus !

I'm from France, and my english is unfortunately awful at this time. I hope i can discuss with you properly soon, i keep working on it ^^".

In short (sorry), I'm 28, paramedic, and after ten years of smoking pot and some alchoholic periods, i've started psychedelics drugs 2 years ago in an introspective "psychonautic" way to "understand myself". And DMT was brought to my path one year ago.

I've never taken the time to read neither the Nexus nor Strassman, McKenna, Huxley & co until the Experience (it's time by the way). I like the "self educated" way.

But after my last "Call" two days ago (first Breakthrough few month ago with smoked DMT), it seems to be a thing to do to come here just sayin' "Hi guys!".

I'll do my best to be able to fill out my introduction essay in a near future, if some of you guys want to know more, i'll be glad to try to answer as soon as i can of course.

Love and Light, :)

(ps : Writing is a good excercice for an undisciplined student like me ^^, it took me a couple (lol) of minutes to write this post ...... well, almost an hour ^^" EDIT : .. a day to correct it)
 
Thank you !


I've experienced mushrooms (a lot, my own cubensis), several times LSD "sensorial breakthrough", some RC's phenethylamin like 2ce-b-i given by some friends to test what it is, but mescaline is the next step in phene because i really don't like the "sketchy effect" of RCs.

However, for now, I like mxe for different reasons linked with the dissociative serotoninergic effect (i call it the "chakra's selector" key ). But it's temporary, I Know it's also an impediment to Be.

Salvia but i didn't breakthrough yet (i've not really tried honnestly).

I have some HBW but i didn't found yet the right Set&Setting to do it well.

Ayahuasca "is calling" me, it's near, but i don't know when and where actually ^^
 
Welcome to the nexus, friend!
This is a good place to be; even if one is "well read" as far as psychedelic literature goes, you can't beat the experiences that are shared here. While you may be hard pressed to get answers from Huxley our McKenna, the folks here will gladly sort you out with any questions you may have.

Happy trails, brother! (assuming you're male!)
 
What you are saying resonate deep in me, thank you brother!

Love you all !

(and yes, i'm a male ^^)
 
I've started my reading of the Nexus forum and ... I'm speechless, I feel so tiny beside you !

I can not wait to ear from your side but i'll do ^^"

I love to be at the beginning of this journey, thank you all for this place ! It's amazing to feel it.


_/\_

EDIT :

About my DMT Experience, I've Breakthrough for the first time in July after several trials during the past year, making my own version of The Machine up to the v4.0 version ^^". After that, i had a very hard sub breakthrough experience (i was thinking "it's ok, go there to have kindness, it's love when you're sad" .....Ah ah ah ah! .. Wrong intention).

Then, in Novembre I've got "the call" (I don't know how describe it in another word), a very intense "transe" experience at a very specific time of my life. (i like to respond at this calls in a meditative and ceremonial form by the way, it's seems to be a sort of "obvious thing to do" naturally)

And 2 calls in December in 3 days just before Christmas that have totally attested to my DMT experience .. then ... i'm here "inspite of me" ^^"

EDIT II :

Well, i must share a last thing about my last "call". I had a first attempt with 20mg free base, then i didn't really breakthrough, it was a "introducing" shot. After 30 minutes i've took another hit of 30mg+, and i've breakthrough to live the most powerfull DMT Experience that i've never had, during 20 minutes, it was about the "Next Step" (i don't know how you're calling it ^^" ).

Then after coming back i was saying to myself "ok, take a break and go again to continue the processus ... ". But i've sub breakthrough, it was disturbing as usual but it was the hardest sub breakthrough that i've ever done ... wrong intention ?

My question at this time is : is it better to end a "call" on a sub breakthrough rather than pushing it?

Thank you.
 
Maybe I'm using some wrong words in the wrong way to describe my experience, i'm doing my best to faithfully transpose my thoughts, but i've so much questions and lessons to learn from you at this point to not disapoint Them like i did at my last attempt of the session few day ago.

I need some advice to stay balanced in the way.

Thank you again, be well friends!
 
hello kalvish, welcome to the Nexus, its good to have you:thumb_up:

kalvish said:
My question at this time is : is it better to end a "call" on a sub breakthrough rather than pushing it?

Thank you.
Click to expand...

I think this is a difficult question, I find that it is good to finish when you feel you are satisfied with your exploration for the day, there is nothing like lying in bed after an earth shattering experience and just revelling in the ineffable glory of it all. Most of the time I don't think is it worth the chance of the session ending on a low, so when I have got it just right, I stop.

However, if you are interested in really exploring the madness it is sometimes a good idea to keep going, I have had some of my most incredible experiences when I have forced myself to take one more journey. I remember a time when I had a particularly difficult experience that pretty much finished me off, I felt exhausted and mentally spent and I was contemplating if I ever wanted to do DMT again, but I forced myself to take another journey.

I found that due to being pretty wiped out from the last experience I just gave into the experience, I couldn't have fought it if I tried and simply allowed it to take me away.

I don't do this very often as its pretty heavy, but sometimes I think listening my monkey mind doesn't do me any good
 
So much Thank you 3rdI !!

By smoked DMT free base it's maybe "too strong" to go there at this time. I feel that's why i need to consider seriously the oral ROA.

Thank you again,
Be well !
 
I hardly ever use freebase on its own anymore, my preference is to smoalk after a harmala brew of some kind, be it Rue, Aya or pharma.

I find that the harmala's give me much more wiggle room, I love a good wiggle:d

good luck with your exploration
 
I 've never heard of "smoalk" before :D. After few researches about it, it seems to be what I need for a better transition.

Smoked free base to go there seems to be a little bit "too deep in a too short time" for me, because i have to be aware of my heart rate when the kick starts ( i had a heart surgery at 15 and i must stay vigilant to not die in the "physical world" at least, i already had a warning in a previous sub breakthrought ^^" )

Thank you for all the good vibes :)
 
I'm glad to read it ;)

It was a powerfull thoughts from Them in my transe in november, the journey faded with the echo of "Ayahuasca, ayahuasca, ayahuasca, ..."

I feel ready, especially after the deepest interaction that i ever had with entities, few days ago. But here's still a doubt about one thing, i'm asking myself if i need to be alone for this special journey or drove by a Shaman all the process. It's linked with the "self educated" feeling, sort of.

In other words, i want to go alone, but "what i must not forget before drinking the brew ?"

EDIT : After reading "all about aya" i have my answer ... you're an amazing community, i feel home :D

Thank you friends !
 
Hi!

I want to share my experience with mushrooms and dissociatives. :)




But first, a little bit more about me:

Since i'm a child i've always been interrested by "the Next Level of Consciousness (by senses)", I've been educated and raised in this way (thank you mom). Sciences (in all forms) have been a very powerfull source of inspiration to me (i love mathematics, but not skilled as i've wanted to ^^" ).

But this "reincarnation" brought to me some ordeals (you don't say? ^^), and i'd lost myself in black magic and stuff like that, to catalyze this process between 13 and 21, but always with a sort of distance, a voice deep in me was saying "it's not right". Long Story short.

Then, between 21 and 26 i'd focused myself on being paramedic to understand the body and the mind more accurately and also ... to heal people (a path that was brought to me after my heart surgery)

After my paramedic's school, and after experiencing pain, illness and death through people by empathy, i'd knew that the "occult way" is not the good way. I felt lost and depressed after that, it was "Where the fuck is the Truth".




And that's where my funny and agitated friends, aka mushrooms, have crossed my way, at 26.

At the first trip (1.5g dry) i felt the need to meditate, not any sketchy hallucination, a clear mind and a powerfull energy filled my body. I was "ooh!! that's it? i've seen and felt worst during my "occult period", why the fuck i was so scared to try it?"

Then i understand "immediately" the real power of entheogenes to bring up the perception of reality.

I use them in a "regular low dose" way to work on it and sometimes I take a "big ticket", but never more than 5g dry.

I've experienced a NDE with 17mg/kg of dxm, "The void", such a wonderfull experience to die and find "nothing but endlesstime to think", typical breakthrough with dissociative. Mxe "helped" me after that to understand clearly the notion of "breaking through" with some hole dosage (80+ mg) and the "how to do it with a low dose" (15 mg). Then I've used it in a "regular low dose" way for several month this year during my meditations to have a better understanding of "how my energy flow works".

I've much more to tell you about my psychedelics experiences but what i want to say now is :

All of this previous journey learns me one thing after my last profund DMT Experience : it's just the beginning and I know nothing at all, and i love that feelling ^^".
 
Hi friends !


My aunt had some very personal physical and spiritual issues, she's 55 years old and during the last years she is in a fight with cancer.

Actually it seems to be in remission, but she spent time with "new age western medecine" without finding the real peace of her soul, she feels lost with all of this.

She loved to travel around the world and try some "spiritual guidance".

So, I wonder if an ayahuasca initiation is the answer for her. But, as you know, i'm just at the begining of my own travel and i don't want to send her in an "initiation for tourist", but a deep healing.

She needs some Elders to find the way out.

If you have anything that can be helpful, I'll be thankful for her.

Love&Light friends


(EDIT : i got my answer! Thank you :D )
 
Hi Friends !

Five month since my "introduction" on the Nexus. Writing in english is still difficult, so i'm doing it simple.

I just want to say that since december a lot of things have changed in my life.

Actually i live at the family home, my mom is aware about my "psychedelic life style" and what "hyperspace" is. And she allows me to do an extraction of mimosa in her home.

I'm working as paramedic with old persons who deal with a lot of troubles in their own lives physically or mentally (various pathology, schizophrenic, alzheimer, etc etc). It's not worth it now to talk about the multidimensionals issues that they have ...

So, I've extracted 3g of DMT from 250g rootbark recently (two pull, extraction STB, still in glass bottles waiting for the third pull ) and turn it into a blend 1:1 of blue lotus / calea / salvia (40% - 40% - 20%).




Yesterday,

The day started at 5am with some "changa" with my VaporGenie curved natural, and i was in a very curious mood to breakthrough since i've started again my paramedic job 1 month ago.

---- I have to say that i didn't work since i've started my psychedelics experiences two years ago (last breakthrough was in december, am i in the "green zone"?)------

Well, i was curious, ready to accept the Mission, now. But i didn't breakthrough.... I was very confused... Why? What i have done wrong?

So i decided to take "a big combo" to "approach" the breakthrough to put me to the "test".

My latest breakthrough occured yesterday while i was on 100µg of LSD, 0.5gr cubensis, 30 mg 2C-D and a "little" bit of MXE. And a join of my own marijuana mixed with a little bit of salvia.

When i've swallow the VG's vapor i was "high like i was never been before"

Not here to say it's a combo to do to breakthrough but just saying.

Because on my last BT, the message was clear "if you want to come back here, start by thank warmly the Being who allow you to do this experience ... your physical mom, listen, she's asking to you .. but are you ready for this? " ....

My question is .. my mom wants to be "initiate", she is very aware (she had a "spontaneous" purge today and she feel to do the diet to clear her body). But she has never took any psychedelics, and she's asking me to prepare her reconnection to her higherself with a "trip", but she have some troubles in his life actually, and i'm here to ask some advices from you guys.

Or at least, a big positive vibe from you to help her to do it right.


Be well friends, Love&light.
 
Much love to you!


Long plane rides in poor health can be very disruptive to the body,
For some reason I feel you will become more familiar with ayahuasca in the near future and then there is a good
Chance you can share, with confidence, with your mother.

blessed Be,
Cube
 
Well,

She tried to kill herself yesterday night, for some bad reasons. Today she's still in a "last day on earth" mood.

I can't handle it, my life is too busy beside all of this to help her properly at this moment of her life so i've decided, with the doctor, to send her in a psychiatric unit with her agreement.


Your advice make a lot of sense today cubeananda .... And it seems taht i'v not understood the message last time.


Be well friends ..
 

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