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Nighttime bedtime vape

fishdeep

Esteemed member
Experienced this last night. Originally wrote this in Norwegian right after the trip to remember, translated via chatgpt. The whole trip was around 2 hours with continuous intense vaping with a vape pen with a cart. Vaping more every time I started to return. Also insufflated some ketamine right before.

The Trip:

I laid down in bed at night to "sleep"—or rather, I lay under the covers to vape DMT. I had all these comic-book-like worlds unfolding, full of colors and patterns shifting rapidly. At one point I was in a world made up of rotating fractal cylinders with dancing beings inside them. The cylinders looked as if they were made of glass or mirrors. It felt like that place belonged to someone, and that I was supposed to show deep respect for being there—as if it was sacred.

It was like I merged with that world, became one with it. I couldn’t feel my body anymore. I just was that world—it felt like I was with God, and also was God. Everything was one. There was no separation. Pure consciousness.

I experienced what it felt like complete surrender truly is—just letting everything happen, loving everything, receiving it all. It felt like I was touching the very essence of existence itself. During the trip, it felt as if this essence was what feminine energy truly is—the fundamental building block of creation, or one half of it.

After dwelling in that state for a while, it shifted into the opposite essence—pure masculinity. It was all about wanting, strength, forward motion, expansion. Not violent, just pure drive. These two forces felt like the foundational pillars of the universe itself—as if consciousness, the totality, wanted to experience both. The feminine and the masculine. It was like there was awareness and it gave birth to these two forces that again create every phenomena/creation we can be aware of.

The entire experience was profoundly sensual and sexual, but not in the human sense. It was more like touching the original meaning of sexuality—the desire to create, the primal force of existence. I wanted to love the entire world, to accept it, to merge with it, to be it.

It was deeply sensual and sexual, but not in a normal human way—more like I was experiencing sexuality in its original form: the desire to create. It felt like the primal engine of existence. I wanted to love the entire world, to accept and embrace it completely, and at the same time, to be it.

I kept vaping intensely, and it became unbelievably strong—pure euphoria. I felt like I had reached the peak, understood the universe, and that everything was perfect. The euphoria and love became so extreme that for a few minutes I got scared—it felt impossible to experience something that intense, like I had broken reality. I thought I was about to lose my mind.

During this, I saw a kind of purple figure with rounded shapes and many tubes coming out of it. But then I just breathed calmly, and things settled. What remained was an overwhelming feeling of love for everything—for myself, for the world, for everyone. Just pure gratitude for being alive, and for having had the experience.
 
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Experienced this last night. Originally wrote this in Norwegian right after the trip to remember, translated via chatgpt. The whole trip was around 2 hours with continuous intense vaping with a vape pen with a cart. Vaping more every time I started to return. Also insufflated some ketamine right before.

The Trip:

I laid down in bed at night to "sleep"—or rather, I lay under the covers to vape DMT. I had all these comic-book-like worlds unfolding, full of colors and patterns shifting rapidly. At one point I was in a world made up of rotating fractal cylinders with dancing beings inside them. The cylinders looked as if they were made of glass or mirrors. It felt like that place belonged to someone, and that I was supposed to show deep respect for being there—as if it was sacred.

It was like I merged with that world, became one with it. I couldn’t feel my body anymore. I just was that world—it felt like I was with God, and also was God. Everything was one. There was no separation. Pure consciousness.

I experienced what it felt like complete surrender truly is—just letting everything happen, loving everything, receiving it all. It felt like I was touching the very essence of existence itself. During the trip, it felt as if this essence was what feminine energy truly is—the fundamental building block of creation, or one half of it.

After dwelling in that state for a while, it shifted into the opposite essence—pure masculinity. It was all about wanting, strength, forward motion, expansion. Not violent, just pure drive. These two forces felt like the foundational pillars of the universe itself—as if consciousness, the totality, wanted to experience both. The feminine and the masculine. It was like there was awareness and it gave birth to these two forces that again create every phenomena/creation we can be aware of.

The entire experience was profoundly sensual and sexual, but not in the human sense. It was more like touching the original meaning of sexuality—the desire to create, the primal force of existence. I wanted to love the entire world, to accept it, to merge with it, to be it.

It was deeply sensual and sexual, but not in a normal human way—more like I was experiencing sexuality in its original form: the desire to create. It felt like the primal engine of existence. I wanted to love the entire world, to accept and embrace it completely, and at the same time, to be it.

I kept vaping intensely, and it became unbelievably strong—pure euphoria. I felt like I had reached the peak, understood the universe, and that everything was perfect. The euphoria and love became so extreme that for a few minutes I got scared—it felt impossible to experience something that intense, like I had broken reality. I thought I was about to lose my mind.

During this, I saw a kind of purple figure with rounded shapes and many tubes coming out of it. But then I just breathed calmly, and things settled. What remained was an overwhelming feeling of love for everything—for myself, for the world, for everyone. Just pure gratitude for being alive, and for having had the experience.
I meant to compliment you on this report some days ago, other stuff (like needing to sleep) got in the way, so here we are!

Your description of the primal, sexual feel of certain aspects of the experience was thought-provoking. It tends to escape my mind (perhaps through being somewhat preoccupied by the situation) that there are some stark parallels in the feeling of 'rivulets of liquid joy' immediately prior to orgasmic release, and some of the feelings (sometimes) obtained in DMT euphoria - where, again, one is perhaps too preoccupied to be making such intellectual comparisons.

There's something written by a guy called Adam Butler that I want to check up on before returning to this - but if anyone else has some relevant observations or references to the literature, I'd be please to hear of them. This matter tends to get swept under the rug to a great extent, perhaps due to its propensity to attract puritans and perverts in equal measure.

Solve et coagula…
 
Experienced this last night. Originally wrote this in Norwegian right after the trip to remember, translated via chatgpt. The whole trip was around 2 hours with continuous intense vaping with a vape pen with a cart. Vaping more every time I started to return. Also insufflated some ketamine right before.

The Trip:

I laid down in bed at night to "sleep"—or rather, I lay under the covers to vape DMT. I had all these comic-book-like worlds unfolding, full of colors and patterns shifting rapidly. At one point I was in a world made up of rotating fractal cylinders with dancing beings inside them. The cylinders looked as if they were made of glass or mirrors. It felt like that place belonged to someone, and that I was supposed to show deep respect for being there—as if it was sacred.

It was like I merged with that world, became one with it. I couldn’t feel my body anymore. I just was that world—it felt like I was with God, and also was God. Everything was one. There was no separation. Pure consciousness.

I experienced what it felt like complete surrender truly is—just letting everything happen, loving everything, receiving it all. It felt like I was touching the very essence of existence itself. During the trip, it felt as if this essence was what feminine energy truly is—the fundamental building block of creation, or one half of it.

After dwelling in that state for a while, it shifted into the opposite essence—pure masculinity. It was all about wanting, strength, forward motion, expansion. Not violent, just pure drive. These two forces felt like the foundational pillars of the universe itself—as if consciousness, the totality, wanted to experience both. The feminine and the masculine. It was like there was awareness and it gave birth to these two forces that again create every phenomena/creation we can be aware of.

The entire experience was profoundly sensual and sexual, but not in the human sense. It was more like touching the original meaning of sexuality—the desire to create, the primal force of existence. I wanted to love the entire world, to accept it, to merge with it, to be it.

It was deeply sensual and sexual, but not in a normal human way—more like I was experiencing sexuality in its original form: the desire to create. It felt like the primal engine of existence. I wanted to love the entire world, to accept and embrace it completely, and at the same time, to be it.

I kept vaping intensely, and it became unbelievably strong—pure euphoria. I felt like I had reached the peak, understood the universe, and that everything was perfect. The euphoria and love became so extreme that for a few minutes I got scared—it felt impossible to experience something that intense, like I had broken reality. I thought I was about to lose my mind.

During this, I saw a kind of purple figure with rounded shapes and many tubes coming out of it. But then I just breathed calmly, and things settled. What remained was an overwhelming feeling of love for everything—for myself, for the world, for everyone. Just pure gratitude for being alive, and for having had the experience.
This is IT - vapeX - keep going - no maoi needed
 
if anyone else has some relevant observations or references to the literature, I'd be please to hear of them
Not directly relevant to DMT, but Wilhem Reich comes to mind. My knowledge of his theories is quite superficial, so I've been meaning to read something by him. My impression is that he ended up getting lost on some of the products of his mind, but in the path from strictly Freudian to whatever he became towards the end there may be interesting ideas.

There are also some thoughts on the topic in Articulations, by Julian Palmer.
 
Your description of the primal, sexual feel of certain aspects of the experience was thought-provoking. It tends to escape my mind (perhaps through being somewhat preoccupied by the situation) that there are some stark parallels in the feeling of 'rivulets of liquid joy' immediately prior to orgasmic release, and some of the feelings (sometimes) obtained in DMT euphoria - where, again, one is perhaps too preoccupied to be making such intellectual comparisons.
Yes definitely, I kind of feel seduced to keep vaping. Im not horny for a person, but horny for the experience haha. Very euphoric and blissful also. I'm very much male but yes with the surrender I was "saying" DMT/universe/god just take me and do what you want. And when that was experienced it was like the coin flipped to show the feelings of the one doing it. And the coin representing it's both the same in a way. Two sides, but still the same. The wholeness.
 
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