One good trip, one mini freakout

[The Creature]

I have had two experiences with DMT, I'd like to tell you a little about the first one so you can better understand where I'm coming from. Maybe someone will even find the contrast of these experiences useful.

FIRST TRIP

The first experience was roughly 15mg smoked in one pull. I was distracted in the beginning of this trip by someone talking in the room with me. After I was given silence the trip really began. I closed my eyes and saw slight visuals. They were dark, only in the sense that they were hard to see, but shapes were definitely moving. This lasted only a moment. Next I experienced complete and total loss of ego. I felt like I was in a void, a pitch black space where I simply existed. This was the extent of the trip. Afterwords I gently floated back down to this reality.

The speed in which the effects took place had me feeling a little uneasy but after the ego loss everything was great. However, as good as it was, I was left with a sense of fear about going back into the experience for a second time.

SECOND TRIP

After a few weeks my curiosity got the best of me, I had to go back. Still being a little scared, I decided to lower the dose to about 5mg just to see what would happen. I have read that a dose this low would do nothing, I have also witnessed others take low doses and well, not much happened for them either. I decide to do a little meditation beforehand in an attempt to calm myself and be at peace with whatever may happen. Finally, I decided to hit the pipe.

Immediately I start to feel weird, and the effects start to intensify. The feeling was what I have heard described by others as an extreme pressure in my core. Like the earliest stages of what I would call dimensional shift, but not quite as intense. Also, it felt like my heart was beating super fast.

My ego would have none of this. I tried telling myself to relax, just breathe, and allow what is taking place... Couldn't do it. It didn't matter what I told myself or how smoothly I controlled my breath, it seemed my being was set to panic mode. All I could do was wait. Fortunately this only lasted a couple minutes then it was gone, after which I felt fine, I was left with the slightest and shortest afterglow possible.

QUESTIONS

Of these two experiences the first was by far the best and caused the least anxiety and discomfort. It makes me think perhaps the go big or go home approach would be most suitable for next time?

I am wondering, on larger doses, do you kind of skip over this initial come up phase due to how fast the peak effects hit? Ego death I can handle, but getting there seems to be the battle. I was distracted the first time so I don't quite have a grasp on it.

Any advice or guidance in any aspect of the DMT experience is much appreciated.

AFTERTHOUGHTS/OBSERVATIONS

The second trip I could still move about and function, the first, almost complete immobility before ego loss. Also, the second trip I had plenty of time to think and analyze, not as much with the first trip.

I thought it was worth mentioning that after my first experience I have noticed my dreams became more vivid and guaranteed to occur every night multiple times. I was a fairly experienced dreamer as it was but this put it on a new level. Not complaining though. It is settling down a little as the weeks pass. I have also become much more aware of my thoughts after the first experience.

 

[ducdevil]

welcome - i see it's your first post.....great question.

in my experience - which isn't that vast compared to some of the other, wiser ones here - lower doses tend to be much more difficult. almost as if you are trying to penetrate something but don't have the inertia. (imagine James Spader trying to get through the Stargate on half-power....) i get really bizarre body twinges and zings when it's either a low dose (which i try to avoid now), or when i have some type of mishap or shut-out (which can't be avoided all the time.) anything less than 10mg is awkward to put it mildly, and once one has tasted "the other side", nothing less than 20mg seems worth it. i've done 15mg trips; always wish i had added the extra 5...at least. my most memorable voyages have been in the 25mg range. personally, i've never ventured beyond ~27mg+-a couple

not to mention, of course, you brought your anxiety along with you like bulky carry-on luggage. usually, whatever you've got cooking in your kitchen, so to speak, will follow you right into the trip. once experienced, this can actually be a good thing, but at first it's hard to know what to expect.

i should add, however, you never know what to expect. and therein lies the mysterious beauty....

safe travels. do it alone. keep meditating. breathe. be still. trust.

 

[The Creature]

Thanks for the reply ducdevil, I appreciate it. Also, nice Stargate analogy.

not to mention, of course, you brought your anxiety along with you like bulky carry-on luggage. usually, whatever you've got cooking in your kitchen, so to speak, will follow you right into the trip. once experienced, this can actually be a good thing, but at first it's hard to know what to expect.

I see that now, lesson learned. Although it was uncomfortable both physically and mentally, in hindsight, I am glad to have had the experience. Now I know. Before, I was reluctant of a larger dose, now, I'd say its the other way around. If I had started with the 5mg dose there probably would not have been a second experiment.

"You can speculate all you want, but unless you check it out for yourself, you never know." -Ace Ventura

 

[ducdevil]

FWIW, this is how i started:

i did not have a sitter available, and my curiosity was stronger than my patience. i have had much experience with psychedelics so i felt prepared. i had read and read and read and read and researched as much as one could....and then some more. i wanted to start wisely and respectfully. i thought i knew what i was about to experience.

that is, of course, nonsense. NOTHING can prepare one for DMT. that being said...

i began at 10mg. i was using a changa i made (1:2 ratio, so 30mg=10mg spice) and was very accurate with my doses (using a .001mg scale). since i had not yet experienced anything greater, it was phenomenal and overwhelming. i think i kept repeating to myself, "ahhhhh.....NOW i understand the power. now i understand what we've got here....".

slowly, i begin increasing the amount over time. it wasn't until i hit 20mg of crystal freebase that i really "got it." but, trust me - you don't really want to start there, in my opinion.

i'm always amused/worried when i read people write, "dude...i scored some deemster and i've never done it before, but i've tripped on, like, 25 hits of blotter so i'm cool. i really want to breakthrough on my first try and all i've got is a meth pipe...am i ok? should i load up 100mg?"

poor thing.

i have not yet had a sitter, and now can't imagine traveling with anyone nearby. the distraction would be far too great. other medicines are better suited for fellow passengers...not the spirit molecule. but that is just my opinion.

good luck

 

[The Creature]

i had read and read and read and read and researched as much as one could....and then some more. i wanted to start wisely and respectfully. i thought i knew what i was about to experience.

that is, of course, nonsense. NOTHING can prepare one for DMT. that being said...

Agreed. This was my approach also, I did as much research as I possibly could in an attempt to gain some kind of understanding of what I was getting into, and how to go about it safely.

i'm always amused/worried when i read people write, "dude...i scored some deemster and i've never done it before, but i've tripped on, like, 25 hits of blotter so i'm cool.

Yes, this is comical. I have heard similar statements after explaining my first experience to a few people I know. I can't help but tell them, you have no idea. I feel that, in comparison, this molecule makes other psychedelics look like baby aspirin. There really are no words one can speak to make another understand.

A question just came to mind. I have read about smoking methods and how a device such as the GVG make the process of smoking easier but I am wondering... Does it improve the trip or effect it in anyway? Most of what I read just states that it doesn't waste the spice and makes the smoke smoother.

 

[ducdevil]

yeah, honestly....the GVG is KING. there are, of course, other methods that work effectively, but something about the GVG is just so perfectly suited. i use what's called a "Health Stone" underneath the first removable glass piece with the ceramic. pre-melting the spice onto the HS makes it near-foolproof. many use a bed or herbs or ash; that works too i've heard.

the psychology of it is also important. if you approach your voyage with thoughts and worries of whether it will work or not in your head, that too is carried into the trip. once you have a ROA and device that works for you, the runway is clear, so to speak. you know it will work...just a question of steadying one's hands, nerves and calming the spirit before liftoff.

i tried using electronic vapes because i didn't want to have to bother with glass or a flame; in actuality you do have a few seconds to put your tools down and assume whatever position/shape you prefer for the voyage.

GVG all the way.

 

[hazbeard]

SECOND TRIP

After a few weeks my curiosity got the best of me, I had to go back. Still being a little scared, I decided to lower the dose to about 5mg just to see what would happen. I have read that a dose this low would do nothing, I have also witnessed others take low doses and well, not much happened for them either. I decide to do a little meditation beforehand in an attempt to calm myself and be at peace with whatever may happen. Finally, I decided to hit the pipe.

Immediately I start to feel weird, and the effects start to intensify. The feeling was what I have heard described by others as an extreme pressure in my core. Like the earliest stages of what I would call dimensional shift, but not quite as intense. Also, it felt like my heart was beating super fast.

My ego would have none of this. I tried telling myself to relax, just breathe, and allow what is taking place... Couldn't do it. It didn't matter what I told myself or how smoothly I controlled my breath, it seemed my being was set to panic mode. All I could do was wait. Fortunately this only lasted a couple minutes then it was gone, after which I felt fine, I was left with the slightest and shortest afterglow possible.

QUESTIONS

Of these two experiences the first was by far the best and caused the least anxiety and discomfort. It makes me think perhaps the go big or go home approach would be most suitable for next time?

I am wondering, on larger doses, do you kind of skip over this initial come up phase due to how fast the peak effects hit? Ego death I can handle, but getting there seems to be the battle. I was distracted the first time so I don't quite have a grasp on it.

Any advice or guidance in any aspect of the DMT experience is much appreciated.

I've got very little experience as far as DMT is concerned. I too only have two experiences with DMT, very similar to yours, but the other way around. My first dose was 0.07g of Changa, and the second was somewhere between 0.15 and 0.20g of Changa.

What you experienced with your lower dose sounds near identical to what I experienced. It was somewhat of a threshold, a taste to familiarize myself with what was to come, however the fact that I was not getting any major visual distortions (apart from a few minor things here and there), this meant that I was not forced into the closed eye visuals as impossibly strongly as a bigger dose draws you. It's like being stuck in limbo. Everything seemed inexplicably different but familiar, but the fact that I was neither here nor there made it quite uncomfortable. Not overly unpleasant, but uncomfortable. I don't mean to hijack your thread, but I'd be curious to know if we are on the same page with the lower dose experience, because I'm still making sense of it myself. :d

The larger dose gave me no say in the matter. The hallucinations basically pushed me into closed eye visuals, which I could either go along kicking and screaming, or accept that this was happening and that I was going to be ok. I chose the latter, and it was amazing. The come up was extremely intense, but in a good way. Like a 4th dimensional orgasm of sorts. Very scary at first, but with my mantras, it made everything ok. The times that I grounded myself by opening my eyes were comforting, but the visuals again started to force me back to darkness by destroying every ounce of reality (including my grounding objects).

As much as the higher dose definitely took me where I wanted to go, I cant say that you should either go hard or go home, because I've had two very enlightening experiences at very different doses. It's all dependent on state of mind, prep, and all that important stuff. At least, to me that's whats important. However, if your body is telling you that it wants a larger dose, and wants to try and break through, then maybe there's a reason for that.

 

[The Creature]

Sounds like I will have to make the investment. I feel a better device may help lower the anxiety, then again I don't really know since I have not the experience.

What you experienced with your lower dose sounds near identical to what I experienced. It was somewhat of a threshold, a taste to familiarize myself with what was to come, however the fact that I was not getting any major visual distortions (apart from a few minor things here and there), this meant that I was not forced into the closed eye visuals as impossibly strongly as a bigger dose draws you. It's like being stuck in limbo. Everything seemed inexplicably different but familiar, but the fact that I was neither here nor there made it quite uncomfortable. Not overly unpleasant, but uncomfortable. I don't mean to hijack your thread, but I'd be curious to know if we are on the same page with the lower dose experience, because I'm still making sense of it myself. Very happy

Hazbeard. No worries friend, and thank you for the post.

It sounds like we are indeed on the same page. I also didn't really get much visual imagery. With eyes open my room had that DMT look/feel, I'm not sure how to best describe it, but I'm sure you and others know what I'm talking about. I also tried closing my eyes, I seem to find more comfort in it. When my eyes were closed I saw what was reminiscent of hypnagogic imagery, or like what you see when you rub your eyes for a minute. No real definitive color or form, it was almost nothing, but also something. Your description of being neither here nor there is pretty spot on. I think that was one of the big contributions to the negative experience, aside from the initial fear going into it.

The larger dose gave me no say in the matter. The hallucinations basically pushed me into closed eye visuals, which I could either go along kicking and screaming, or accept that this was happening and that I was going to be ok. I chose the latter, and it was amazing. The come up was extremely intense, but in a good way. Like a 4th dimensional orgasm of sorts. Very scary at first, but with my mantras, it made everything ok. The times that I grounded myself by opening my eyes were comforting, but the visuals again started to force me back to darkness by destroying every ounce of reality (including my grounding objects).

This is also very similar. I kept my eyes open at the beginning of the trip to observe what was taking place, but I found that this caused me to think a lot and was not as enjoyable. Once I closed my eyes on the larger dose It was a whole new experience instantly. I too felt the push you talk about, and also made a choice. That choice was to relax and let it happen, indeed an amazing feeling when you let go. I felt like I did not have this choice on the smaller dose, I just couldn't relax into it. "Like a 4th dimensional orgasm of sorts." I understand what you mean, hard to explain isn't it? How do you truly describe a feeling.

Best of luck in your future travels.