• Members of the previous forum can retrieve their temporary password here, (login and check your PM).

Problems with letting go and accepting

Migrated topic.
quiksilver98

quiksilver98

Mike Tripporty
This is a long read. Essentially this is what I sent to a shamanic center as an inquiry. But this is my biggest problem, I ahve a VERY hard time letting go and accepting loss of controlI feel that my ego feels challenged. Anyways here is my story.


I am currently practicing to become a shaman practitioner, although I believe I might have the genuine shaman's call. I started out when I was 16 smoking marijuana and wanted to experience Magic Mushrooms (back the I knew nothing of shamans or spirits), and when I turned 17 I finally got hold of some. When I took them the first time it was just a fun time, I can barely recall it. The second time I took them. I got showered in knowledge about the spirit realm and how babies in a mothers stomach got their spirit I also learned about the tree of life(divides physical and Spirit realms). I also learned about the way people choose to run their life and how oblivious they can be toward certain aspects of life. It completely changed my beliefs and outlooks! I loved my new way of seeing. When I took them the third time I realized that life in western culture is a complete failure and that the reality that these people bring on themselves is fake and just leeches from mother earth. I also learned that just because what percieve as reality isnt necessarily actualality and that mdoern culture is just a closed up group of people disconnected to the earth. Then I took them again about a week later. As the trip came up 2 of my friends showed up at my house drunk and beat up from a terrible bail on his skateboard. They were argueing with each as to who caused it and I had to kick the one guy out. Then my friend asked if I could buy him some smoke and just as I was about to walk out the door I passed out while I was standing. I was flying through hallways until my trip (he was there since the beginning, we were tripping together) friend slapped me until I was awake and the other friend had 911 dialed on the phone ready to press talk. I instantly started freaking out and bad tripping. I felt poisoned and felt loss of control. Sick to my stomach and scarred. I eventually got out of it and managed to sleep. The next time I took it was Canada Day and it was shear impulse. It was mushrooms tea and I thought i would jsut trip alone and before they even came up I realized all the OTHER possbilities of what I could do that day and thought maybe I could get out of it by throwing it up. I tried to and instantly I started getting a panic reaction and felt I had made myself trapped. My skin went white and I was sweating profusely. About 2 weeks after this I developed general anxiety disorder (what westerners call it) and get random bouts of fear. I get fear especially when I get weird feeling around my body or when I feel vulnerable.Its a feeling of impending doom and loosing control and being envelopped in reality, I think I have angered the plant spirits with my abuse of mushrooms. I understand to this day that the world in modern culture is a fake paradise and that there reality is only percieved to be real but is slowly killing the earth. I get very psychic moments where ill think about something with a friend and the phone will ring and it will be that friend concerning the matter I was thinking about. Or I will think I see sometin out the corner of my eye and it quickly goes away. Or I will be thinking the same thing as someone else randomly, but constantly. I recently stopped smoking pot because im aware that a good shaman is also grounded when he needs to be and pot leaves residual effects for days after. So I gave up my joyeus habit for my spiritual growth as a man of knowledge.

During my childhood I was always told what to and not do and my parents acted very paranoid and strict towards certain aspects of my life. My dad is a alcoholic and I have to deal with many fights in our household due to his drunkardness. 10-12 beers a day. If its of any relevance


So this was 3 summers ago.... And here I am today with the same problem. I have been over a month and a half without marijuana.

Does anyone have any insight as to how I can learn to voyage again and break the resistence and fears. Taking a psychedelic is impossible for me now because whenever I think about it Ig et scarred and get afraid of being trapped and soo on. I realize its for spirituality but if you want to stop the trip u cant and this is what caused my problem on Canada day.
 
i have some insight... Don't force it. it will call to you and feel natural for you the next time. if you are scared, you are scared for a reason. that reason has been set there by whatever forces you believe in to help you balance yourself out.

no offense, but your stories sound like the infantile stages of psychedelic use. i have heard these similar stages of use a handful of times with new users. just take your time, do more research, reading, learning.
 
Fear is normal..it means your sane!

You need to accept the fear for what it is if you are gunna walk this path brother..and just let it go.
You will be ok..you will always be ok..anyone who is serious about this stuff has been there. You need to remind yourself that you will always wake up in one peace the next day. These things for me are also best done at night where i can spend the entire experience in bed if i need to in a dark room..when i take them out in the daytime with people and whatnot things are much more inclined to go south.

It's about barriers..and the dissolution of those barriers..
Fear is like the great shadow that reminds you of whats around that corner..the unknown.

Nice report brother!
 
I know it was infantile psychedelic use and I have realized my mistake, i realize that very quickly. I have gained in spirituality tremendously and learned feats of information since those times. Back then I didnt know what I was doing, though I knew I was getting knowledge I didnt know how to handle myself with the knowledge. The fear is soos trong it feels impossible to break :S. I will type more later, I am actually playing guitar right now
 
Fear is controlled by thought! Try taking up meditation and yoga if you haven't, it can help tremendously in many aspects of life

I would read as much as possible on the nexus and internet..and try tippy-toeing back into mushrooms or brew some ayahuasca when you are ready. Both of these spirits are very healing and friendly when used respectfully. They can break down the barriers and blocks one has within them and help you see your anxiety problems in a new light. Whatever you do this community is all here for you along the way

Happy trails!
 
UniverseCannon said:
Fear is controlled by thought! Try taking up meditation and yoga if you haven't, it can help tremendously in many aspects of life

I would read as much as possible on the nexus and internet..and try tippy-toeing back into mushrooms or brew some ayahuasca when you are ready. Both of these spirits are very healing and friendly when used respectfully. They can break down the barriers and blocks one has within them and help you see your anxiety problems in a new light. Whatever you do this community is all here for you along the way

Happy trails!
Click to expand...


Thanks for all the support!

What doyou mean "tippy-toeing"? if that means small doses then I would kind of see that as disrespect for the pleant spiritsbecause you are fair prancing your way around them? Ayahuasca, is essentially what I want to do but in ceremony with a genuine shaman.

My barriers are for the most part broken down and this is also where I am vulnerable to anxiety. I have tried to control my anxiety with thought but it can still become very overwhelming and I ahve tried taking up meditation, well listenning to brainsync cd's or mp3 such as those from www.unexplainable.net. I understand the mind very well, just not my own. I am hoping pure intent with spice might be able to give me access to what I need but I also realize that spice will give me the trip it wants and thinks I need. I feel that with the position I am in; learning the hardway about how childish I acted back then (I really understand properly now through studies of shamanism and personal insight) and the anxiety problems that my life is almost at a stand still before I am not moving anywhere with my concsiouness enlightenment. I can see outside the box but I mean my own spirit feels challanged by my ego or that I have maybe lost my soul.
 
you had a bad accident on psychedelics, that may cause anxiety or fear as u said, best suggestion i can give is to take some break and let them call you, select the right place and persons you gonna trip with, because setting is too important. Dont just percieve the trip as a spiritual trip, because sometimes your expectations from psychedelics change but you dont notice. If its insanity that you fear on psychedelics face it.

I would recommend a nice psy party or festival, because there u will find the best environment to trip and will probably let your fears go between those many insane ppl. And remember Its all about ur perception if u percieve urself.

Also related to karma, keep your karma clean before taking psychedelics. And know one thing "noone can tell you what is right and what is wrong" you are living your own life no other monkey is better than you on this planet all of them are rolling inside this unknown situation, The point is how can yu manage to handle it.

Another suggestion would be trying different music style that gives you the right mood. I can recommend shpongle and similar artists and genre.

After a while, when you go deep into sykedeliks the name of the game changes; since you are too aware, you are alone. And you should find the right path for urself to handle this reality that u are aware. Do good things, be soccial get good karma.

I had to quit smokin weed due to other reasons for long time. And to be honest THAT HELPS A LOT for your current situation. When you smoke theres no problem but when you dont you get depressed especially about your past life, So better dont smoke weed for some more time.

I am thinkin about what other suggestions to give but i cant think of many at the moment. If its the sudden fear of death feeling that doesnt let you take sykedelics i recommend that you shouldnt smoke weed for at least 4 more months and dont take psychedelics for at least 3-4 weeks to see how you can fight with it..

Take things easy, dont bring your egos to your mind when you are living sober, I mean dont loose your egos but just know how to control them. If anything more spesific u need help about feel free to PM

Peace
 
Thanks once again!


I am not planning on smoking ganja in the near future, I am an advocate but I realize it can mask a lot fo things I need to face.
It has been 2 years since my last intense trip. I did smoke dmt 6 or so months ago but I torched it and it came down as quick as it came up. I dont know really what it is that I am afraid of the other reality of psychedelics, in one incidence it feels like i be trapped away from the grounded physical with nothing to do but bear it where I can loose my sanity. In another sense sometime I would like to be tripping but I cant bring myself to actually do it because as soon I realize I can trip the anxiety builds again.

I realize a trip can bring you nowhere but can be a religious experience too and that bad trips for the msot aprt teach more than good trips. I have many anxiety, my psychedelic anxiety iisnt the only one. For my whole life i have had anxieties about the way my parents see me, its weird to explain, i jsut feel like a little kid if i think botu the way i seem to them especially with a girlfriend, its really bazzarre. And i am generally shy with the girls too which is another setback. Plus I get anxieties about the way I will turn out due to influence my drunkard father had on me with the lazyness factor, start something without finishing, self-centere are all things i fear of being and i do have traits of the lazyness. I feel my life is in a vicous cycle right now that needs to be broken soo I can grow

I think the mushroom spirits opened me up to experiencing my anxieties at full force to udnerstand that anxiety can rule anything and that is infact, fake, but for me this is still not good enough....
 
I can understand your situation, to help yourself about the girls just imagine they are other monkeys livin on this planet and every animal needs another animal to have relation, physical or emotional. Life is full of paradoxes that your spirit will fall tired from challenging them, only when you let go of challenging them and accept paradoxes as the life itself, and know that existance has no sane explanation at all, and nobody knows the real true path, they are just choosing a path and declaring it the right one to relax their own spirits and get good karma for themselves, then you can feel much better and comfortable in this reality.

Look at everything with a clear and wide perspective; Like your parents grown you but actually you are a free spirit and you know what to do about your own life, at the same time show love to everybody knowing we will all leave this reality soon and everybody needs a bit of love before they leave. Enjoy world with it different, opposite, challenging aspects of it.

Choose your friends good, If you dont have any good choices around just keep some friends enough to soccialize and other very few friends as real friends. Do some activities alone sometimes like going to forest sitting silent there and enjoying nature not just thinkin about the existance like "how does these trees form, why is this plant like that, what makes that birds sound so funny".... dont think about these much, just sit there and let the sound of the nature meditate u with every funny/weird noise it can make, try to put a smile on your face with them.

Accept everyone and everything as it is so that you can learn to accept yourself as you are. Once you can accpet and understand your self good you will have less problems and less anxiety im sure.

Things need time tho, it hasnt been so long that you quit weed, for me it took 3-4 months to feel really cleansed in my mind. I smoke spice just once month or once in 2 months. I wait for it to call me. I never abuse psychedelics. After you keep clean for some time, first get some mild dose mushrooms, not directly DMT.
 
The things with the girls is I have been trying tobattle it my whole life and I always get anxieties that im not good enough and that kinda stuff. And also most girls are the glamour materialist kind which i am not fond of. There are only a few girls who understand things and dont try to impress with the glamour lifestlye.

the forest is a very good idea of which I will try tomorrow! I have a really god friend and also I know what you mean that we are all the same and that nonone knows true certain truth. When you quit cannabis were you around people who smoked because I am and I think that could be contaminated my clealiness because THC is still in the air. I try to accept everyone but I cant stand materialistic thugs and TNA glamour girls whoe have no respect, and I have troubles with the ignorant people. Even thought my beliefs are firm someone can say something that challeneges my belief and for some reason it sticks with me, it reflashes in my mind and i ahve to recollect my information as to why I am right. For example a fact about marijuana like it killing braincells or something stupid like that.

Mushrooms I think would be more of a problem because it is 6 hours long whereas DMt is 5 minutes. Ever since my anxiety developped, any psychedelic trip I took even in small dose would cause me tremendous anxiety the next day towards night time. i think my anxiety could be because my parents would fight at night time and it got really heated at times because of my dads drunkness and soo it imprinted in my mind, it is the exact same fear as when those arguements are goin on. The fear was of being left alone and helplless and loosing everything.


By the way I find it interesting that your time for stopping smoking of marijuana is 3-4 months to clense the mind. THC once ingested is quickly metabolized to 11-OH-THC which is active for 3 days~ and then is metabolized into THC-COOH which is SUPPOSEd to be not psychoactive but stays in the body for upto 3 months.
 
hey quicksilver98 , i am not really very experienced with spice just 2 sessions as of yet , however i've had now years experimenting with classical pychadelics with LSD being my favourite .......
fear is ok , its ok to be afraid but don't let fear in anyway stop you from doing what you want , i am really afraid each and everytime i do things which seem risky like mountain climbing and psychadelics in some sense are like that , however go on in your own way and at your own speed .......its best if you accept fear as being a part of you as much as courage is , for you have both , they both complete you ......
one very important thing i've learnt over years is to choose who you are going to trip with , if you find some really nice experienced people who you can trip with it might change a lot within you , during the infancy of my use with LSD i suffered a lot and tripping with some old and wise people changed a lot for me , tripping is a very spiritual activity and set and setting are of utmost importatance , set being your mindset and setting being your surroundings and the people you are surrounded with .......
with time and more experiences , things will become more comfortable and a fast way to this comfortable place is i would recommend is being surrounded by wise and illuminated people , accept your fear as soon as you can and accept the courage you have within you and you will go beyond both , realize our true nature and fear will die .....
and don't worry about the girls , don't care that much somebody who really appreciates you will find you , infact always be yourself and don't change that for no reason ...........
respect death , as this is mostly the cause of all forms of fear , if you have to fear something be afraid of stupidity , ignorance , greed
your anxiety and fear will go , where all things go in this universe , ultimately into a world beyond , you are given birth and one day you will die , fear is for those who are going to live forever ......
peace brother
i can be wrong , its just my perspective , i felt like sharing it so i did
 
Hey thanks for your insight. The anxiety can be VERY strong at times though I have not had a panic attack yet. MY friend suggested I brew ayahuasca and soo did Corridor. Although SWIM has just extracted some spice and thats my closest option right now.

For me the anxiety feels like a impenetrable barrier holding me back with all its might. I want to get the puck and score on the net but the defensman is holding me back on the rink wall (I play hockey sorry). I really want to break free and grow as ive said and I think psychedelic can help with this if my mind is in the right place. I stopped smoking weed to hopefully achieve less anxiety soo I could build the courage to go forth with the experience. Everytime I do mushrooms after that Canada day, my mind manifests that imt rapped and soo on during the waiting for the come up.

Last christmas, not very recent one but last year I thought maybe I could avoid the nausea of mushrooms but allowing them to absorb in my mouth. I had about 2.5g of which I put 1g in my mouth and waited for 40 minutes, nothing was happening, i put the rest in my mouth and waited, nothing happened really and figured that the patterns in the carpet was the MOsT i was gonna get out of it and soo i swallowed them thikning nothing would happen being really dumbwhitted about (I think the mushroom spirit tricked me into swallowing them, because usually I would have known what i was doing before the thought even came up)....anyways long story short I started tripping and I actually liked it I felt entranced and colors were amazing. Then my mom banged on the top of the room I was in and although I know she dont care about me doing shrooms, I got freaked out for some reason. Then i went to bed still in semi-good tripping mode and then experience becoming a a patch of mushrooms growing from the ground and felt myself grow out of the ground, it was very insightful and interesting. Then after that I tried to sleep and obv couldnt and then the anxiety kinda tried to creep in but I held my composure and lasted it out without problem. The next day at night my anxiety peaks were a lot higher and more frequent.
 
you might not believe this quicksilver for the first 50 times i did LSD , each and every time was quite a disaster , i remember this one time my friends threw a party at a farmhouse with 50 of us flying on some really powerful stuff but quite impure as i could feel it , i kept running throught the night in that place freaking out on everyone i was seeing at the party , well in the morning the party got busted as neighbours around were having problems with the music being stupendously loud ....
and i was still freakin out but something made me stop , when i did stop you would not believe what i saw , everybody was freakin out and runnin because of the bust and the only sane thing to do was to run into a car with my friends and leave before getting caught by authorities while going back one of my friends was continously fighting with us i mean literally because he thought we were kidnapping him , i know it sounds hilarious but that is what it was ..... the party was later named paranioa party rightly ,
so my friend all i have to say is its ok to be anxious , i have been where you are , just find some good company to trip with or better alone find some good music possibly psytrance nothing is more soothing on a trip while you are full ON , meditate on GOD when anxiety comes on in a trip nothing is more reinforcing than the fact that there is a being looking after you who wants the best of you.....gain more experience of the psychadelic realm in your own time and i promise you anxiety will leave you , it might take some time and experiences of growth however eventually your anxiety will have to go where all things go ...into the big mystery and don't worry about the weed , its not a good idea if you become addicted to it however it has its own healing potential ......
remember this my friend one day you will be dead and then you will laugh over all of it , i rather suggest you start laughing now , for you are a being traveling in time to that final experience whether you like it or not does not really matter , however it is not the end , there is no end as there is no begining , the universe is magic which has taken form and you are a part of it , you are made of that magic , stardust as some popular movies have stated , this reality might just be a simulation , could also be a level of progression the soul goes through before proceeding to further levels of evolution till the point the soul becomes one with whatever is .......i personally beleive this latter option as the simulation idea seems a little freaky to me .......
i promise you with time and experience you will grow and this anxiety will go , let it hang around as long as it wants to as sometimes this protects us from doing really stupid things and make your peace with it for in time it will subside anyway , i met a man who was about to die in a few days and believe me he was not afraid , there was no fear in him quite the opposite he was eager to know what happens next yet enjoying the magical moment he was presently in , neither wanting to live more and neither really wanting to die , he was just experiencing and this is what life is , an experience
its the best thing that we can feel emotions such as joy , hope , fear , lust anxiety and all of it , its what makes us human , and thank GOD that we do feel , its a gift all these emotions so enjoy your anxiety as much as you can for now for it will leave you anyways whether you like it or not :d
peace
i can be wrong , its my perspective , don't take it as face value , you will grow and evolve for evolution is happening without our consent and that is guaranteed.....:lol: have a good time and keep tripping
 
Thanks again, how would you recommend I start off and venture back into psychedelics? SWIM just extracted some spice and soo yeah....

I think im also scarred because during my mushrooms voyage I believed I was one of the few not capable of having a bad trip and then it happened.
 
To: quiksilver98 - I think its a very good topic, you started. (and I really agree wtih the replys, especially "cooridors of my cells" have good points. I have not yet tried the spice, so... I think set/setting is very important. My advice is to restart with the light stuff IE Shrooms, they are to me a little gremlin-like and somewhat confusing, but in my experience they are (at moderate doses) a good doorway to the heavier entheogenic stuff. (THC is a complete waste of time in my opinion, been there - done that)

If you have a good friend that you trust, do some together in a place you both feel safe (if possible have a valid assesment of shroom strength) Make some preparations, bottled water low lighting etc. Cut all distractions off. Have some playlists ready of diffrent kind of music you enjoy, some soothing and positive and maybe something with some energy.

Speak to your friend about possible anxiety, you might have. Communication is key, try and establish a good mood, listen to nice music, relive funny/cool things you have experinced together to strenghen bond and feeling of acceptance/compassion.

Relax and ground yourself at take off (i find taking a dump, first also helps with stmmach upsets :). That my 3 cents. I cant advice you on spice, but it seems that it should be treated with respect (even more so than a lot of others Ents.)

Go easy!
 
quiksilver98 said:
The things with the girls is I have been trying tobattle it my whole life and I always get anxieties that im not good enough and that kinda stuff. And also most girls are the glamour materialist kind which i am not fond of. There are only a few girls who understand things and dont try to impress with the glamour lifestlye.

the forest is a very good idea of which I will try tomorrow! I have a really god friend and also I know what you mean that we are all the same and that nonone knows true certain truth. When you quit cannabis were you around people who smoked because I am and I think that could be contaminated my clealiness because THC is still in the air. I try to accept everyone but I cant stand materialistic thugs and TNA glamour girls whoe have no respect, and I have troubles with the ignorant people. Even thought my beliefs are firm someone can say something that challeneges my belief and for some reason it sticks with me, it reflashes in my mind and i ahve to recollect my information as to why I am right. For example a fact about marijuana like it killing braincells or something stupid like that.

Mushrooms I think would be more of a problem because it is 6 hours long whereas DMt is 5 minutes. Ever since my anxiety developped, any psychedelic trip I took even in small dose would cause me tremendous anxiety the next day towards night time. i think my anxiety could be because my parents would fight at night time and it got really heated at times because of my dads drunkness and soo it imprinted in my mind, it is the exact same fear as when those arguements are goin on. The fear was of being left alone and helplless and loosing everything.


By the way I find it interesting that your time for stopping smoking of marijuana is 3-4 months to clense the mind. THC once ingested is quickly metabolized to 11-OH-THC which is active for 3 days~ and then is metabolized into THC-COOH which is SUPPOSEd to be not psychoactive but stays in the body for upto 3 months.
Click to expand...

We are too much similar about not loving materialistic people and girls i can totally understand you my friend. I didnt have relation for long time coz of this prblem. Everyone looks so stupid.

My advice would e to stay away from environment where ppl smoke weed thats what i did. Tell them sorry i just cant sit with u when ur smokin, so without breakin anyones heart u do the best for urself. True friends can understand this, other bad friends just keep tryin to do favors to u.

The reason i recommended the mushrooms before dmt was the intensity of the trip. And i have observed that ppl smoking dmt for some time and who doesnt balance their soccial life, become antisoccial and then get depressed so cant find a right time for even smoking dmt.

And about that 3-4 months thing its true because after 1-2 weeks you will not want to smoke and will not feel depressed coz you didnt smoke, but your mind still will be a bit cloudy or paralyzed i dunno how to define. Also your body will feel much better. And will be able to soccialize more.

Here finding gud friends is impossible. So what i do is to go out with stupid ppl just to soccialize, spending time with few other monkeys, not having any deep talk, no real friendship , just some stupid activities to not pass all my day alone. So i suggest the same for u . I know once u get into smoking weed you dont have much friends who doesnt smoke around you. But try to make some new ones if u dont have enough clean friends. Dont expect them to understand you or share deep thoughts with you, understanding that these simple and stupid momnets u spend with ppl makes u soccial and less depressed will help u a lot.

Long stories short be a simple person when necessary, when you are around smart ppl be smart, when ur here in nexus be as u wish :) act as the life wants you to act :) and enjoy every stupid thing you do :)
 
hey quicksilver , both Tatva and Corridors of my Cell have provided some seriously positive and amazing insights into this and you should take full advantage of this , infact its the best thing you have joined Nexus as the members here are very illuminated and wonderful people each one of them will only wish the best for you .......
and about the venturing back into psychadelics ,
(1) always remember to have some good company around who you can be comfortable with or if you don't feel comfortabble with people who are your tripping buddies then go alone , its sometimes better to be alone than with people who do not support and understand you as they can only cause more havoc....
(2) some really good music should be playing throught your experience as it makes a lot of people more comfortable during tripping specially when doing mushrooms,LSD,or Mescaline as these are long duration psychadelic with mushrooms being the shortest duration , nothing beats psytrance for me when i am full on and when coming down chill out music lets you in a comfortable sleepy mood that you can enjoy ( music is like a guide in your trips choose your music , its very important )(only SPICE can be done without music and give you a good experience , with other psychadelics music is very important however even with spice try going with music as this is really relaxing and on spice chill out is the best music try shopngle , aes dana , OTT , hallucinogen )
(3) make sure you have cleaned your house or place where you are tripping to have positive energy around (this is very important people might not think so however cleanliness lets you to a different place than dirt)
(4)before doing any psychadelic try having a plan specially with longer duration psychadelics , plan what you are going to do , if you are planning to chill and have a good time in your place do that , don't change the plan when it comes on , if a psytrance party is happening somewhere near to you for sure go there and do your psychadelics as then when you see everybody freakin out it might give you a ironical view at things. try sticking to a plan you have made .( this is not the same for Spice as spice is very short duration and plans really don't make a difference then) (you aRE BACK EVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT )
(5)most important of all Trust yourself and trust in God , you are the product of evolution over a millenia and whats in between your ears is really very Sharp , whenever anxiety comes over in a trip when doing longer duration psychadelics try to focus on something else , move around ,change the music , dance , sing and anxiety will go....however when smoking spice (i cannot say i am really experienced with this so my advice on this might not be the best however just put some music on chill out preferably , have a experienced sitter if possible or other wise alone , make sure do it at night terrence mckenna said , the advised time to do psychadelics is in the night , let your anxiety build as you pick up the pipe and bring it closer to your mouth light it up and smoke your spice and let the anxiety which has build up all this time go with the smoke that comes out of your mouth )
i am shit scared evertime i am smoking spice and the anxiety is gone by the time i am back , if anxiety comes over in the trip of spice just try meditating on yourself and God and trust Spice ......
so remember , good music + cleanliness + good company + faith in yourself and God + Psychadelics = Good Trip
peace brother
don't forget an angel is looking over you whenever you go in deep waters and this angel is your soul
 
set and setting is (like everybody knows) the main thing i guess...last night i was alone at home and did some shrooms. basicaly thought everything was perfect..but my wife's granny lives upstairs..so during the trip i start feeling bad cause maybe something will happen to her and then i have to take her to hospital, blablabla..you now, chatter. so you see even when it did not bothered me before the trip, it did during...just a little example
peace
 
thanks for all the helps guys! I really still cannot shake the anxiety, I will try with might to overthrow the anxiety so I can gain some courage which I have none of to take that bite into 2.5g of sacred shrooms. Its seems like my next trip will be a deciding trip because of the many bad trips I have had now that seemed to have permantly scarred me. I think im ready for healing now but its ultimately up to the spirit realm to decide that. It feels like im taking a chance at jumping off a 1000 foot cliff into a lake before and hitting the rock bottom.
 
Back
Top Bottom