RhythmSpring
Established member
I had a somewhat scary experience with Salvia today, and I didn't even take it!
For the first time in a long time, I introduced a friend to Salvia. I had 13x on me, a lot of it. I'd had it for like, 5 years, and now I know why. Too strong for me, and I think perhaps too strong for the guy I showed it to.
He's a guy I look up to a lot, and though he doesn't think too highly of his own mental stability, from my perspective he has his shit together. He's just very energetic. Anyway, I gave him the basic low-down, and he took his hit.
Within seconds he slouched down, way down, as if defeated. He normally is a guy who stands very erect, not proud, but energetically tall. Anyway, now he was slinking low, and sighing huge breaths, like something immensely disappointing was happening.
The feeling increased until he started to recoil in his chair, look around, and say, "I'm scared." He said this a couple times. "I'm here," I said, and I held his hand. "Where are you?" he said. "I'm right here." "This is terrifying. Oh god, why did you tell me about this? What have I done? Why did you make me do this?"
Though I was there to guide him along, I was really worried that the Salvia was messing with his mental wellbeing. Did I screw up his perception? Would the experience give him depersonalization? derealization? existential depression? PTSD?
He got up and talked about warping, never-ending folding of papers, you know, the typical Salvia "imagery" (more like sense-of-self-fuckery). He said, "Did I take a drug?"
I was so relieved when he asked the question. Why didn't I think to tell him this before? "Yes, you took a really perception-altering drug." "Oh."
It was quite a ride for him. He came back down (as everyone does), and was quite disoriented. In many ways, this was a textbook Salvia trip. He says he's fine now, no longer scared. But he says he is now aware of other realities in a way that seems a bit unsettling to him.
I'm writing this post because a) I wanted to say that this was very scary for me--I could have been partially responsible for sending someone into existential depression, which I think is the most common risk with Salvia divinorum. And b) because I've made some observations based on watching him go through his trip.
There are two distinct ways of using Salvia: A) To use a high extract and totally and completely mess with your sense of reality, and B) to use a small amount and use it for divination purposes.
A) I believe is
more dangerous
more of a novelty experience
harder to integrate or ascribe meaning to
B) I believe is
less dangerous
less of a novelty experience; more of an intentional, two-way street-relationship with the plant
easier to find meaning that pertains to the users life.
When the trip was well over, he compartmentalized the experience as sort of a test for the spiritual warrior on his journey. I have so many conflicting feelings about this.
The main overriding feeling is relief that he was able to conceptually separate himself from such a scary, spiritually dangerous experience.
At the same time, because it was such a strong experience, he wasn't able to really experience all the benefits (like listening to a guiding intelligence, letting it cleanse you, etc.) that Salvia has to offer.
Third feeling: I am inspired. Inspired by his ability to retain his sense of humanness amidst something so crazy, so identity-messing-with. We are more than puppets, we are more than spirits, we are more than bodies, we are more than minds--we are humans: an amazing combination of all these things that creates this completely unique entity that is us. You can't get permanently sucked into any dark realm that a psychedelic opens up because YOU ARE HUMAN. Today, I am proud of my humanness.
Salvia is something else. It is completely absurd to me that this plant is grouped together with other drugs. Just look at whatever website that sells Salvia. Oh, look at their list of products: Kratom, herbal ecstasy, Salvia, benzo fury... what?! That's like making a shopping list that goes like:
Grapes
Pork
The way photons are being studied in Switzerland
Apples
No. It's not that Salvia is a "weird" drug. It's that the majority of us are mistaken in using the word "drug" to describe it. Not that it isn't mind-altering. It's just misleading to put it in the same category as kratom or, hell, DMT.
Thanks for listening. I'm gonna keep an eye on my friend for a few days.
RS
For the first time in a long time, I introduced a friend to Salvia. I had 13x on me, a lot of it. I'd had it for like, 5 years, and now I know why. Too strong for me, and I think perhaps too strong for the guy I showed it to.
He's a guy I look up to a lot, and though he doesn't think too highly of his own mental stability, from my perspective he has his shit together. He's just very energetic. Anyway, I gave him the basic low-down, and he took his hit.
Within seconds he slouched down, way down, as if defeated. He normally is a guy who stands very erect, not proud, but energetically tall. Anyway, now he was slinking low, and sighing huge breaths, like something immensely disappointing was happening.
The feeling increased until he started to recoil in his chair, look around, and say, "I'm scared." He said this a couple times. "I'm here," I said, and I held his hand. "Where are you?" he said. "I'm right here." "This is terrifying. Oh god, why did you tell me about this? What have I done? Why did you make me do this?"
Though I was there to guide him along, I was really worried that the Salvia was messing with his mental wellbeing. Did I screw up his perception? Would the experience give him depersonalization? derealization? existential depression? PTSD?
He got up and talked about warping, never-ending folding of papers, you know, the typical Salvia "imagery" (more like sense-of-self-fuckery). He said, "Did I take a drug?"
I was so relieved when he asked the question. Why didn't I think to tell him this before? "Yes, you took a really perception-altering drug." "Oh."
It was quite a ride for him. He came back down (as everyone does), and was quite disoriented. In many ways, this was a textbook Salvia trip. He says he's fine now, no longer scared. But he says he is now aware of other realities in a way that seems a bit unsettling to him.
I'm writing this post because a) I wanted to say that this was very scary for me--I could have been partially responsible for sending someone into existential depression, which I think is the most common risk with Salvia divinorum. And b) because I've made some observations based on watching him go through his trip.
There are two distinct ways of using Salvia: A) To use a high extract and totally and completely mess with your sense of reality, and B) to use a small amount and use it for divination purposes.
A) I believe is
more dangerous
more of a novelty experience
harder to integrate or ascribe meaning to
B) I believe is
less dangerous
less of a novelty experience; more of an intentional, two-way street-relationship with the plant
easier to find meaning that pertains to the users life.
When the trip was well over, he compartmentalized the experience as sort of a test for the spiritual warrior on his journey. I have so many conflicting feelings about this.
The main overriding feeling is relief that he was able to conceptually separate himself from such a scary, spiritually dangerous experience.
At the same time, because it was such a strong experience, he wasn't able to really experience all the benefits (like listening to a guiding intelligence, letting it cleanse you, etc.) that Salvia has to offer.
Third feeling: I am inspired. Inspired by his ability to retain his sense of humanness amidst something so crazy, so identity-messing-with. We are more than puppets, we are more than spirits, we are more than bodies, we are more than minds--we are humans: an amazing combination of all these things that creates this completely unique entity that is us. You can't get permanently sucked into any dark realm that a psychedelic opens up because YOU ARE HUMAN. Today, I am proud of my humanness.
Salvia is something else. It is completely absurd to me that this plant is grouped together with other drugs. Just look at whatever website that sells Salvia. Oh, look at their list of products: Kratom, herbal ecstasy, Salvia, benzo fury... what?! That's like making a shopping list that goes like:
Grapes
Pork
The way photons are being studied in Switzerland
Apples
No. It's not that Salvia is a "weird" drug. It's that the majority of us are mistaken in using the word "drug" to describe it. Not that it isn't mind-altering. It's just misleading to put it in the same category as kratom or, hell, DMT.
Thanks for listening. I'm gonna keep an eye on my friend for a few days.
RS
