seeking something I guess

[bransondude]

Alfrendo has had what people call depression for many years. He has found caapi extracts and harmalas to be very helpful at relieving the depression but Alfrendo wants to take it to the full level and combine DMT with maoi. Years ago when it was possible to order 5-meo-dmt online Alfrendo smoked some and it was a very typical kick in the face. He had powerful antidepressant effects for days afterward.

I think Alfrendo ordered some virola resin. 3gm calo. and 1gm theo. His plan is take caapi 10x (500mg) under the tongue then swallowed. He may wash it down with some caapi tea he has sitting aside to help with gut maoi. Then Alfrendo would probably take 500mg each of virola theo and calo under the tongue. With the rest Alfrendo would probably try to create a changa blend with some THH and caapi 10x.

I hope Alfrendo finds lasting relief from the depression that haunts him. He hopes to get a sense of motivation back into his life so he can get himself into college (he's 29 years old and has been fearful of commiting to a career path). I also hope he can get better at relating to people, something Alfrendo finds challenging but rewarding. He is also a user of JWH-type drugs, which he has come to prefer to cannabis. He is somewhat dependant on it but doesn't want to be. It would be nice to include a little Iboga micro-dosing but such root is not easy to acquire. I expect repeated dosing over a year for lasting effect, however this has become important to Alfrendo's progress psychically/mentally.


Alfrendo's most enjoyable psychedelic experience was 9 inches of T. peruvians. His most powerful was a fully out of body salvia divinorum experience, closely followed by smoked 5-meo-dmt (which was very colorful but more of a psychedelic car crash than a journey somewhere profound)

 

[Newfound_wonder]

Welcome to the forums, I hope you find what it is that you are seeking. I can relate to many parts of your post; SWIM is also a semi-dependent JWH-user who is seeking healthier activities to replace his habit. Spice can definitely affect your sense of well-being and your outlook on life; if you haven't noticed the warnings yet it can cause suffering if you aren't careful. But when equipped with sufficient information, your frontal lobe can figure out how to maximize benefit gained from these substances while minimizing the harm. Your brain is actually really good at information-based optimization, provided that it's operating on realistic information.

I hope The Nexus can help you find what you need to turn that diffidence into confidence (although maybe I'm being presumptuous). Don't be afraid to express yourself and say what's on your mind. Maybe someone around the world can relate to what you're doing. Plus, you can't fix what you don't know is broken.

 

[vovin]

I suffered from extreme bouts of depression for many years. I did not take drugs for it I chose to conquer it myself. It is the hardest thing you will ever do. But now I am happier than I have ever thought possible. each day it gets better, hang in there there is a way you and with persistence you will find it.

 

[bluntmuffin]

I too had some problems relating to people, and with who I wanted to be. I used psilocybin mushrooms to help me realize what I already knew (namely all the mistakes and their causes). I've decided to continue metamorphosing for the rest of my life.

Remember, that if you want to be fluid - you can. People mistakenly assume their personality and habits are fixed. That is the single biggest threat to your success, I believe. If you want to change, then it begins inside of you. Change will be hard, and sometimes (or most of the time) it will even seem like you cannot win. Those are times when your will is the only thing that will keep you going. So build a strong will. And as a first step, I'd recommend that if you're smoking (not vaping) JWH - then you cease that for the benefit of your lungs. I used to smoke JWH as well - I've since quit, and I feel much better for it. With these healthier lungs I can now exercise, and tap into an inexhaustible supply of endorphins.

It's only you.