MySmelf
Rising Star
The following trip report was written directly from the notes I took. It is a mix of what I wrote during the trip and what I added the day after.
Dec. 11, 2011
430mg pure white Mescaline Hcl dissolved in a cup of coffee.
28mg pure white DMT preloaded in the GVG
Put my whole Shpongle collection on shuffle.
3:00pm started drinking the coffee, slowly. It was very bitter and I'm use to drinking my coffee black.
3:10pm finished the coffee
I sat in meditation as I awaited the mescaline to take hold.
3:30pm first sensations coming in a subtle wave of warm tingling almost like an amphetamine flush.
Every 20min a slightly more intense wave would come over me, slowly building up. After the first hour I started feeling a little cold and put a sweater on.
5:43pm tripping LOL! For the last half hour at least.
At this point I concluded that some DMT would be wonderful and couldn't be a bad idea.
5:55pm hit the GVG OMG! DMT is an illuminating light that leaves no shadows and opened mescaline fully.
No hyperspace here, instead it enhanced the mescaline experience tremendously! I was right, it was wonderful :d
The enhanced colorful visuals faded after about 20min but the heightened euphoria lasted for a long time.
6:35pm ate an orange. Sex, Death and Life!
I felt like a hungry animal while peeling it. All my cells were quivering in anticipation.
I looked at myself in the mirror (I always enjoy doing this while tripping) and couldn't help but laugh. The closer I looked the funnier I seemed to be.
I spent a lot of time just crawling and rolling around on the floor enjoying the pure bliss of the moment and the music.
I came to realize that I'm holding on to too much. I need to give of myself fully. I felt like I was holding on to the side in the deep end of a swimming pool. If I want to swimm freely and enjoy all the pool has to offer then I need to let go of the side and trust that I will float.
Life is The Gift, not one we receive but one we Give. I give my life.
I sat in meditation and let my thoughts clear, focusing on just my breathe and the pure awareness of being.
I caught an image of an old pain hidden deep inside and I persued it. Behind closed eyes I came up against stop-motion animation of armored guards in front of a fortress. What was I protecting/hiding locked up in this fortress in my mind?
My mind tried to deny it, side step it and "beat around the bush" with me. Told myself "you didn't take enough mescaline to break down this wall." But I knew I didn't need to because its my fortress after all and I had the key all along.
I was flooded with thoughts of my mother and felt confusion. "I don't understand!" "I'm confused!" Thats how I felt as a child when my mother left me. I started crying. The more I understood and accepted that "I don't understand!" the more I cried. As I cried my old tactile hallucinations of expansion/contraction came on and got stronger with every sob. I suddenly realized what my hallucinations actually were and the truth of it made me laugh which inturn caused me to cry. I laugh/cried until the hallucinations vanished and I felt washed and renewed.
my old tactile hallucinations are just a manifestation of the hole or emptiness I buried away after my mother left me when I was four. I locked emptiness away inside my head and it was huge!
8:45pm ate an Apple, it was like ripping into the still beating heart of a young fawn and kissing the tender nape of your lovers neck at the same time.
Sensual and Savage
Sex, Death and Life all rapped up in Love!
The comedown was long and slow and seemed to promote contemplation and some integration of the experience.
I could still feel the affects up until I fell asleep around 2am.
The next day I had a slight headache and felt a bit drained but nothing a little weed couldn't help. 8)
Dec. 11, 2011
430mg pure white Mescaline Hcl dissolved in a cup of coffee.
28mg pure white DMT preloaded in the GVG
Put my whole Shpongle collection on shuffle.
3:00pm started drinking the coffee, slowly. It was very bitter and I'm use to drinking my coffee black.
3:10pm finished the coffee
I sat in meditation as I awaited the mescaline to take hold.
3:30pm first sensations coming in a subtle wave of warm tingling almost like an amphetamine flush.
Every 20min a slightly more intense wave would come over me, slowly building up. After the first hour I started feeling a little cold and put a sweater on.
5:43pm tripping LOL! For the last half hour at least.
At this point I concluded that some DMT would be wonderful and couldn't be a bad idea.
5:55pm hit the GVG OMG! DMT is an illuminating light that leaves no shadows and opened mescaline fully.
No hyperspace here, instead it enhanced the mescaline experience tremendously! I was right, it was wonderful :d
The enhanced colorful visuals faded after about 20min but the heightened euphoria lasted for a long time.
6:35pm ate an orange. Sex, Death and Life!
I felt like a hungry animal while peeling it. All my cells were quivering in anticipation.
I looked at myself in the mirror (I always enjoy doing this while tripping) and couldn't help but laugh. The closer I looked the funnier I seemed to be.
I spent a lot of time just crawling and rolling around on the floor enjoying the pure bliss of the moment and the music.
I came to realize that I'm holding on to too much. I need to give of myself fully. I felt like I was holding on to the side in the deep end of a swimming pool. If I want to swimm freely and enjoy all the pool has to offer then I need to let go of the side and trust that I will float.
Life is The Gift, not one we receive but one we Give. I give my life.
I sat in meditation and let my thoughts clear, focusing on just my breathe and the pure awareness of being.
I caught an image of an old pain hidden deep inside and I persued it. Behind closed eyes I came up against stop-motion animation of armored guards in front of a fortress. What was I protecting/hiding locked up in this fortress in my mind?
My mind tried to deny it, side step it and "beat around the bush" with me. Told myself "you didn't take enough mescaline to break down this wall." But I knew I didn't need to because its my fortress after all and I had the key all along.
I was flooded with thoughts of my mother and felt confusion. "I don't understand!" "I'm confused!" Thats how I felt as a child when my mother left me. I started crying. The more I understood and accepted that "I don't understand!" the more I cried. As I cried my old tactile hallucinations of expansion/contraction came on and got stronger with every sob. I suddenly realized what my hallucinations actually were and the truth of it made me laugh which inturn caused me to cry. I laugh/cried until the hallucinations vanished and I felt washed and renewed.
my old tactile hallucinations are just a manifestation of the hole or emptiness I buried away after my mother left me when I was four. I locked emptiness away inside my head and it was huge!
8:45pm ate an Apple, it was like ripping into the still beating heart of a young fawn and kissing the tender nape of your lovers neck at the same time.
Sensual and Savage
Sex, Death and Life all rapped up in Love!
The comedown was long and slow and seemed to promote contemplation and some integration of the experience.
I could still feel the affects up until I fell asleep around 2am.
The next day I had a slight headache and felt a bit drained but nothing a little weed couldn't help. 8)
