Attention All Shipping
Rising Star
- Merits
- 42
I don’t write a lot of experience reports but I wanted to put this one out there as its very different from anything I’d experienced before.
I’ll deal with this in 2 parts, as it takes place on 2 separate days & is 2 very different experiences with the same DMT.
I have to say at this point that I’ve been doing marathon training and to assist this (provide extra energy, endurance, focus) at lunchtime on both days I’d taken 50mg of DMAA (1,3-dimethylamylamine) & 50mg caffine prior to a run. This was about 6 or 7 hours before I took the DMT so I wasn’t expecting it to have any influence.
The first time I don't think it did.
I hadn’t smoked DMT for a while now, and hadn’t broken through for a while before that, and on Fri I decided to take up the pipe again. I’ve got a variety of ‘types’ of DMT (slightly different extraction results/solvents used/etc) and this time I decided to use a waxy orangey type I’ve had sitting around unused for ages.
Don’t know why I did but I decided to put 80mg in the pipe (wooden vaporgenie) to be sure of breaking through. About 10 min before I also smoked about 20mg of harmala extract. I find it difficult to describe what came next, there were several distinct stages of the experience, not all of which I can remember ……..
There was a very busy place, which was changing itself, everything was movement and change, There were some areas of blackness, vaults or wells and I got a strong sense of being in a fractal.
There was a VERY strong message which I struggled hard to keep ahold of (though I know I've forgotten some nuances): that I needed to change may ways, focus more and see things through not (as I have been doing) just doing things half heartedly and jumping onto the next new thing and leaving the last one unfinished.
Coming down I got images of folk I know and a realisation it’d be utterly impossible to explain any of this. No one else’d understand.
Afterwards I was very meditative, very quiet and with an empty mind. That's unusual for me as I don’t do meditation and never usually have a clear mind. I was also very cold, which is usual for me after smoking DMT. I spent a lot of time after that thinking about the experience and the insight. No that’s not the word, the powerful message I was given and the changes I needed to make in my behaviours and patterns.
On reflection I felt that this dmt, harmala mix was very very much like ayahuasca – which seemed great to me, I got a very clear direction to go in to sort my life out, and great awe-inspiring visuals (which I can only vaguely recall now). Based on the Ayahuasca similariies I assumed this orangey DMT had a fair amount of ‘red dmt’ in it.
That’s not the dark side – that comes now.
On Mon figuring that there’s still likely to be a useable hit in the pipe I pre-dosed 20mg harmala extract, as before, but when hitting the vaporiser the results were completely different.
It was absolute chaos!
It may be a truism of dmt to say you don’t know what’s ‘real’ but here I was launched into an insane mix of real and very dark feeling malevolent distortions of reality.
There was a very definite dark essence to this experience and I was completely removed from my living room, instead I knew was going through all this on Tue, at a serious meeting at my work.
I do have this meeting on tue (tommorrow as I write this) and preparations have been taking up a lot of my time, it’s a big deal but somehow the DMT experience catapulted me into that future so I was actually there & the universe was tearing itself apart. Absolute DMT chaos of morphing Everything, with very rought dark overtones, me not keeping together at all – feeling like my entire self was fracturing into nothing - and seeing images of the (quite senior & very straight) folk who’ll be/were in the meeting.
I did keep some aspect of ego or self as I kept wanting this to end, but at the same time I really believed I was freaking out in that meeting.
As I came down I only started to realise it wasn’t real when I noticed that no one was calling me up to ask what the hell happened in there.
All through it I had a huge amount of energy, and as I was coming down I could still feel the energy in my arms and hands bubbling under the surface – not plesantly but like some force with no way out.
When opening my eyes everything in the room looked washed out and less vibrant than normal.
I realised too that I understood now what psychomimetic means, this is what a paranoid schizophrenic or psychotic breakdown must be like.
I’ve had ‘bad trips’ before, where I’ve taken too much of something or I’ve had difficult internal processes to work through that weren’t pleasant. This was different, I’ve never had a palpable taste of darkness and evil before but that’s what I got today.
I’m over it now, though still a little wired even now, rationally I’m attributing a lot of this to the presence of the DMAA in my system – and never taking DMT with DMAA again. But I also wonder if the melting & re-solidifying of the orangey DMT from Fri could have played a part.
It doesn't matter I'm not put off DMT by this, but I'm definitely not underestimating it again.
I’ll deal with this in 2 parts, as it takes place on 2 separate days & is 2 very different experiences with the same DMT.
I have to say at this point that I’ve been doing marathon training and to assist this (provide extra energy, endurance, focus) at lunchtime on both days I’d taken 50mg of DMAA (1,3-dimethylamylamine) & 50mg caffine prior to a run. This was about 6 or 7 hours before I took the DMT so I wasn’t expecting it to have any influence.
The first time I don't think it did.
I hadn’t smoked DMT for a while now, and hadn’t broken through for a while before that, and on Fri I decided to take up the pipe again. I’ve got a variety of ‘types’ of DMT (slightly different extraction results/solvents used/etc) and this time I decided to use a waxy orangey type I’ve had sitting around unused for ages.
Don’t know why I did but I decided to put 80mg in the pipe (wooden vaporgenie) to be sure of breaking through. About 10 min before I also smoked about 20mg of harmala extract. I find it difficult to describe what came next, there were several distinct stages of the experience, not all of which I can remember ……..
There was a very busy place, which was changing itself, everything was movement and change, There were some areas of blackness, vaults or wells and I got a strong sense of being in a fractal.
There was a VERY strong message which I struggled hard to keep ahold of (though I know I've forgotten some nuances): that I needed to change may ways, focus more and see things through not (as I have been doing) just doing things half heartedly and jumping onto the next new thing and leaving the last one unfinished.
Coming down I got images of folk I know and a realisation it’d be utterly impossible to explain any of this. No one else’d understand.
Afterwards I was very meditative, very quiet and with an empty mind. That's unusual for me as I don’t do meditation and never usually have a clear mind. I was also very cold, which is usual for me after smoking DMT. I spent a lot of time after that thinking about the experience and the insight. No that’s not the word, the powerful message I was given and the changes I needed to make in my behaviours and patterns.
On reflection I felt that this dmt, harmala mix was very very much like ayahuasca – which seemed great to me, I got a very clear direction to go in to sort my life out, and great awe-inspiring visuals (which I can only vaguely recall now). Based on the Ayahuasca similariies I assumed this orangey DMT had a fair amount of ‘red dmt’ in it.
That’s not the dark side – that comes now.
On Mon figuring that there’s still likely to be a useable hit in the pipe I pre-dosed 20mg harmala extract, as before, but when hitting the vaporiser the results were completely different.
It was absolute chaos!
It may be a truism of dmt to say you don’t know what’s ‘real’ but here I was launched into an insane mix of real and very dark feeling malevolent distortions of reality.
There was a very definite dark essence to this experience and I was completely removed from my living room, instead I knew was going through all this on Tue, at a serious meeting at my work.
I do have this meeting on tue (tommorrow as I write this) and preparations have been taking up a lot of my time, it’s a big deal but somehow the DMT experience catapulted me into that future so I was actually there & the universe was tearing itself apart. Absolute DMT chaos of morphing Everything, with very rought dark overtones, me not keeping together at all – feeling like my entire self was fracturing into nothing - and seeing images of the (quite senior & very straight) folk who’ll be/were in the meeting.
I did keep some aspect of ego or self as I kept wanting this to end, but at the same time I really believed I was freaking out in that meeting.
As I came down I only started to realise it wasn’t real when I noticed that no one was calling me up to ask what the hell happened in there.
All through it I had a huge amount of energy, and as I was coming down I could still feel the energy in my arms and hands bubbling under the surface – not plesantly but like some force with no way out.
When opening my eyes everything in the room looked washed out and less vibrant than normal.
I realised too that I understood now what psychomimetic means, this is what a paranoid schizophrenic or psychotic breakdown must be like.
I’ve had ‘bad trips’ before, where I’ve taken too much of something or I’ve had difficult internal processes to work through that weren’t pleasant. This was different, I’ve never had a palpable taste of darkness and evil before but that’s what I got today.
I’m over it now, though still a little wired even now, rationally I’m attributing a lot of this to the presence of the DMAA in my system – and never taking DMT with DMAA again. But I also wonder if the melting & re-solidifying of the orangey DMT from Fri could have played a part.
It doesn't matter I'm not put off DMT by this, but I'm definitely not underestimating it again.
