Here is the experience in a post format. Cheers
Therapeutic LSD session 12/17/2024
My name is John . I am 42 years old. I have a good amount of experience with psychedelics. From early on
around 17 years old I tried LSD for the first time. I enjoyed it very much and did it quite a bit until around 19
years old. I never did LSD to get a spiritual experience. I only did it to get messed up and see cool things. In fact,
I feel I abused it a bit. It got to the point that I didn't ever want to do LSD again.
It was around 19 years of age that I got introduced to the hippy world and began going to camp out shows and
Phish concerts. It was also the same time I met 2 very good friends of mine. They too were into psychedelics,
but experienced them in a very different way.
It was then I was taught, how I perceived at that time, the correct way to have a psychedelic experience. Setting
was everything. Dark room/rooms, tapestries, glow sticks, blankets and pillows, and of course psychedelic
music. That mostly consisted of exploring music from the 1960's and 1970's, which I believe was the height of
psychedelic experimentation on a large scale. My friend Cory explained to me that there is a metaphorical door
when you take psychedelics. You can keep that door closed, held shut, and have a mild experience with some
visuals. But, if you opened that door, didn't fight what was happening and just let it flow, you could reach a
much higher realm of that experience.
Once I figured that out I was able to get extremely powerful psychedelic experiences off of very little. I would
eat 1.2 grams of mushrooms and be transported to the same space, every time, without fail. A very special,
spiritual place that allowed me to feel music as if I was feeling the musician play every note, and feel every bit
of feeling put into each note. That is how I here and feel music to this day, completely sober. It forever changed
the way I experienced music. It was so beautiful.
From then on, for a few special times a year, my friend Nick and I would take a “journey” together. That's what
we liked to call it. It really did feel like a journey.
Yes, I did it to see the wonderful things you see on psychedelics, but I also did it to delve deep into my own
mind. To search for knowledge in the psychedelic realm. I did it to connect closely with my friend. We shared in
these amazing journeys that taught us about life. Each time I “tripped” in this way, I would experience a point
where everything that was not important to me, that was causing me stress or anxiety, would be at the
forefront of my mind. I would see it for what it was, and let it go. Then, everything that was important to me
would come to the forefront of my mind. I would focus on that and remember. The next day I always felt better.
I had a new outlook on life. I left like a new man.
For me, this was the pinnacle psychedelic experience. These experiences continued until my late 20's when my
friends both moved to Colorado. It was around that time that I stopped using psychedelics. Not completely, but
few and far between through those years.
It was around 34 that I started using alcohol pretty heavily. I was unemployed and very bored. I never really
used alcohol much before that. I didn't like the way it made me feel the next day. Just not worth it.
It was on a very boring day, around 10am, that I had the bright idea that day drinking would be fun. What else
was there to do anyways. This quickly turned into me drinking all the time. Every day. When I eventually got a
job, the day would go by and I couldn't wait to get home and have a drink. I would get home, take 2 shots of
vodka (my preferred vice), make a mixer, and sit down to some dinner and TV. I would drink until it was time for
bed. Then I would wake up in the middle of the night, the alcohol having worn off, and couldn't go back to
sleep. So I began the habit of taking a shot of vodka to go back to sleep. This led to me feeling like garbage all
day at work. Struggling to make it through the day. Getting hot during the day (I now realize this was
withdrawal from the alcohol). When I got home, I did my routine, and I felt better. Until the next day that is.
This terrible cycle would end up repeating itself for 7 more years. It got really bad for the last 4 years and I lost
jobs and almost lost my marriage over it. During that time, I was trying to get sober. For my wife, but not for
me. Through years of counseling, supports groups, and finally finding the right therapist, I got sober. At the age
of 41 I was finally sober. The year is 2024.
I finally felt I was free of this terrible thing. But I still wrestled with something in the back of my mind. Causing
me stress and anxiety at random times for no reason. I knew I held onto a good amount hate for myself for
what I did. Deep regret and embarrassment I buried deep down. But I was sober, and that's what mattered. I
never thought of alcohol anymore. It was not part of my mind. I was a hippy. A stoner. I had been smoking
marijuana since I was about 15 years old. It really helped my ADHD brain calm down. I could focus on things
and my schoolwork improved. I never stopped using marijuana and continue to use it.
Whenever I got sick, I would drink vodka because it made me feel better. So now, when I get sick, I have a
strong urge to drink. Which I have given into. It's the only time drinking even crosses my mind. I was sick and
tired of this happening. I was sober, but this kept intruding on my happiness. My sobriety was at risk every
single time I was sick. I would give in and drink when I was sick. But then I would stop myself, sober up, and
return to work. This was a BIG step for me. In the past, I would always drink myself into loosing my job or
missing out on days of work, calling in “sick” more days because I drank myself into oblivion. But now, I had a
bit of control and could stop myself with the tools I learned from years of therapy and group sessions.
In 2021 I found a documentary show all about the history of psychedelics. In each episode it went deep into the
history of each psychedelic and it's uses. It was a wonderful show. I learned a lot about what I had been using
all those years ago. It brought back the wonder I had for them. What I found most interesting in these
documentary episodes is that in almost every episode, the psychedelic or “medicine”, was used by shamans
and healers to heal people of addictions, anxiety, stress, and many other psychological ailments. And from what
I could tell, it worked. The testimonies were real. This really worked. I still wasn't sober then, and I thought
maybe this would help me. But I didn't really know how to go about it.
I took some mushrooms one day, hoping it would “fix” me. I had a mild trip and nothing significant happened. I
was disappointed. So I gave up and continued with therapy and support groups.
Now, finally being sober, but slipping up when I was sick, I was scared that I still hadn't beat this thing.
It was this year, 2024, that I watched “How To Change Your Mind”. An incredible documentary on the history of
psychedelics and their therapeutic uses. All the experiences on the show that the participants in these studies
talked about, I could relate too. It started opening my eyes to the real possibility of healing completely through
the use of psychedelics. But not how I used to do them. I needed to use them the way I had seen in the
documentary. The scientific, spiritual, way.
From that I learned how to set up my therapeutic psychedelic experience.
This is what I learned about how to set it up and how the healing sessions happen throughout history, no
matter that tribe, no matter the place on earth. These are the key ingredients to achieving healing through
psychedelics.
1. There is always an elder, someone who knows the territory very well. (I felt that this was me)
2. There is usually a group or community involved. (this was going to be hard. I felt comfortable doing it
alone. I also had my friend texting me when I needed it)
3. Always having an intention or purpose to what you're doing. What you want the medicine to help with.
4. Always treating it as sacred in order to achieve altered states of consciousness.
5. Be respectful of the medicine and accept what is happening.
6. When the medicine fully hits, lay down in a bed, put on a blindfold and headphones playing calming
meditation music.
7. Remember your intentions strongly.
8. Let it work it's magic with your intentions. Let the medicine guide you.
9. Accept what is happening. Don't fight it.
I decided it was time for me to try this. To fully heal myself and rid my self of this addiction forever.
I texted my friend Nick and asked him if it was OK if I texted him throughout my session if I needed him. Of
course, he said he was more than happy to be available. He was definitely there for me. I was not alone.
Throughout this account, I will include text message exchanges between the 2 of us.
I was able to procure some LSD and on 12/17/2024 at 4:10pm, I put the gel tab on my tongue.
I then held a ceremony by myself. I prayed to the god I believe in and to the medicine itself. I asked for healing
of my addiction to alcohol. I asked for healing for the anger against myself that I held onto. I asked for healing
for the stress and anxiety I felt for seemingly no reason.
The come on was pretty quick. I felt it around 10 minutes after taking it. It slowly built over 50 minutes. I felt so
warm and loved. I texted Nick:
4:47pm
“Oh the warm, loving embrace. I forgot. I'll be just fine my brother. Love you.”
Nick: “For sure, it's so darn wonderful. Love ya brother.”
4:50pm
“Letting it guide me. Relaxing meditation music on right now”
Nick: ”Meditation and ambient music is awesome, I love it so much. Glad to hear it's progressing nicely.”
Me: “Ya, it's so nice. It came on very slowly. Still building.”
“It's wonderful”
During this time I was sitting in my living room in the dark with Christmas lights on over my 2 windows. It was a
great setting. I had my bedroom all setup with blankets and pillows for my healing session. I had a shirt to fold
and put over my face. I didn't have a blindfold. I also had my computer monitor on with a psychedelic 3D
generator making amazingly trippy patterns and scenery. This was a staple for most of my past journeys and it
made me feel comfortable. Which I believe is what is needed to achieve a good psychedelic experience. Setting
is everything.
Around 5:20pm, I felt as if I had arrived fully in the spiritual realm and that I would be here for awhile. I went to
my bedroom and laid down on the bed. Put the covers over me and put the shirt over my eyes. I was in
complete darkness. I started to feel intense feelings.
I texted Nick:
5:28pm
“Dude, headphones man. Headphones. Say goodbye to this realm. I was just laying in bed, shirt over my face.
Intense love wrapping me. Holding me. My past family, relatives, this is their love. It surrounds us all. Binds us
together.”
I then began searching for Nick's energy. I texted Nick:
5:29pm
“I found you man. I feel your energy with me.”
“Thanks for the love hug brother. I'm in tears”
Nick: “Heck yeah brother! That's crazy, I was just think sending hug energy! Amazing.”
Me: “So amazingly wonderful. I felt it strongly. That love hug”
I had a vision of our ancestors and my past relatives. They were
guiding me through this healing ceremony. Holding me with
their love. I could feel it surrounding me and filling me. It gave
me immense peace. I was not alone it in this. I had my
ancestors there to guide me through it.
When I came out of this vision I texted Nick:
5:47pm:
“I feel so connected to our ancestors. I feel like a shaman. I've
been here many times. But this time is special. Different. Done
with intent. I held a small ceremony by myself at the beginning.
To have the medicine guide me and teach me. To heal my
addiction. To heal my pain and suffering. To mend old wounds.
I can't escape it now. It's working it's wonders on me.”
“Oh praise God. He is real, in all things. All around us. We just
have to look.”
6:26pm
“I'm in a heady space I've never been before. It's like deep meditation.”
It was around this time that an intense wave of strong energy hit me. I laid there for a long time. I had many
visions and out of this realm experiences. I was in my body, but transported somewhere else.
I had a vision of my wife. She was floating in the middle of blue
clouds. There was energy beaming out of her heads, hands, and
feet. I realized that it was love flowing out of her endlessly. My
wife was filled with endless love for me.
I texted Nick:
6:28pm
“Realizing the world is love. My wife is love. She is filled with
intense love. She bursts with love. It flows out of her. I've tried
to quell it. That was a mistake. I must let her love fill me
completely. So wonderfully completely.”
Nick: “Absolutely. Love man, it's everything.”
Me: “It is. It's the meaning of life. Love is life.”
In one of my out of realm experiences, I was taken through the
universe by the gods of the universe. They cradled me in their
arms as they flew me through the stars. I believe they were
showing me how beautiful the world is. How I was missing out
on all this beauty. The one thing I most vividly remember them
showing me and telling me was this:
They stopped me over the earth. I saw the earth and it's
continents' outlines were lit up like neon lights. Then I could see
beacons of light all over the earth. The gods said:
“We have left many psychedelics on earth. We left them there
for you to commune with us. To connect with the spirit world.
We did not make alcohol. Man made alcohol. Consuming alcohol
disconnects you from the spirit world. It makes you forget about
it. It makes you numb to the world around you.”
After that, one of them took my hand and laid me back down in my bed. I felt the hand holding my hand so
strongly. It was real. When I opened my eyes I expected to see a hand holding my hand, but there was nothing
there and I gasped in awe of what just happened.
I was able to stand up and walked around for a little bit. I felt a bit nauseous so I smoked some holy plant
(marijuana). That made me feel a lot better. For me, when I was tripping, if it got too intense or I felt sick at all, I
smoked some holy plant and it calmed everything down and made me feel better.
Then another wave of intense energy hit me and I had to lay back down in my bed. I didn't know it then, but
this time I was going to go to battle with alcohol. I was having visions and somehow, with great struggle, texting
Nick at the same time it was happening. The phone my was connection to Nick, my trip sitter, and the phone
was visually with me during the vision.
Here is the text:
6:43pm
“I feel as if I'm under water now. Moving so slowly. Slow to be able to see the world around me. What's been
there the whole time. But my eyes were closed to it.” The texts continues, but I want to set the scene for what I was
seeing and what was happening while I texted Nick.
It was at this time that my vision filled with flames. I was
surrounded by flames. There was a black ball of energy in the
flames. It was the alcohol. I could see it for what it was. It was a
sad mass of stress, anxiety, hate for myself, anger, and fear. It
was all balled up and stuffed away. I felt like it was me. I was
hiding away because of my addiction.
The texts continues. This was insanely hard to type at the time. I
remember saying the words as I typed them and it was very
hard to speak as well. I believe this was all part of the battle.
“...but my eyes were closed to it. The alcohol blocked it. Took it
away and hid it. But fuck you alcohol!! Fuck you. I found you. I
beat you mother fucker. I beat you and condemn you to hell. To
never see me again. You are the one that is lost now. Not me. I
am found. I am found again. And sharing with my brother. My
true brother in spirit. In this spirit world we live in.”
6:44pm
“Wow. That was intense. I got through something there. Something major got healed. I love you Nick. With all
my heart and soul. We are brothers forever in love.”
Nick: “I love you too brother! So glad that alcohol didn't take you like it does so many. Well done! It takes a lot
of strength to beat it. Heck yeah to getting it done!”
Me: “Thanks brother. It was quite a struggle. I think this was the final step I needed. I'm in tears.”
After that vision I continued to have moments of being able to get back up and move around for a little bit.
Then I would get hit by another big wave of energy and have to lay back down. The visions that followed were
all peaceful, tranquil spaces that soothed my soul and covered me with warm, loving energy. It felt like a healing
process.
Around 7:30pm, my wife came home. The LSD was still going very strongly but I was able to talk with my wife
for a bit. I had another vision while knowledge was pouring into me while telling my wife everything coming
into my head.
I had a vision of a Native American. He appeared to me in the
door of my closet. His face was very vivid and flowing with
magical energy. He told me alcohol was the white mans poison.
The white man had brought alcohol to the Native Americans
and many of them became addicted to it. They forgot the spirit
world. They forgot their ancestors.
It was truly amazing seeing and hearing this. This was true in
history. I just never looked at it that way. The alcohol had cut of
many Native Americans from the spirit world. It was so sad.
For the next few hours I experienced times of being able to
move around and times of having to lay back down and have
more visions. I don't quite remember them all yet. But the overall experience was very moving.
This entire time, I had headphones in my ears with the meditation/ambient music playing. I truly believe it was
the key factor into getting into your head and having healing visions and other realm experiences.
At 9:30pm I was pretty mentally exhausted from all this healing and learning and I wanted it to be over. I asked
the medication if I could take the ear bud out and end this part of the experience. I asked if it was OK if I could
enjoy the rest of this experience they way I used to. It felt like it was OK and I took out the ear buds.
The intense mediation feeling ended almost immediately. I breathed a sigh of relief. I went into my dark
bedroom and put The Doors Strange Days cassette into my boombox. I turned it on and felt a rush of nostalgic
feelings as The Doors took me into their heady space. I finished that up and put on The Doors Absolutely Live.
That was amazing and I was dancing like a hippy in the dark. Feeling the energy coming from the music. It was
beautiful. That live album become incredibly psychedelic and intense.
Around 10:30pm I put on Bob Dylan/Johnny Cash Nashville Skyline. This album set me into a very calm and peaceful
state and I fell asleep.
This was the single most intense psychedelic experience I have ever had. It is very important to note that this
was not all a wonderful experience. Some of what I went through was very tough and scary. But I never fought
what was happening. I let it happen. I believe this is paramount in achieving the healing desired from the
therapy session.
I took over a month to write the ending to this paper. I wanted to let the experience settle in and to see the
lasting healing for myself before writing about it.
Today is 1/24/2025. Throughout this past month after my experience, I feel amazing. I feel completely healed. I
feel like I got myself back. I no longer have any lingering stress or anxiety from unknown places. I no longer feel
like there is something inside of me still, something that wasn't healed. That feeling is completely gone. I feel so
wonderful.
On 1/22/2025 I got very sick. Probably a stomach flu. Not one time during my sickness did I have an urge to go
buy alcohol. Not once! I can confidently say I am fully healed from my addiction. It no longer holds any power
over me.
I wish other addicts would have this type of therapy readily available to them. It truly can heal people from
addiction. I am living proof. My hope is that if you read this, you get curious. Watch How to Change Your Mind
of Netflix. It truly is the best documentary on the healing powers of psychedelics. Watch some of Hamilton's
Pharmacopoeia. Get curious. Read about it. Seek out test therapies for this.
Healing is out there, you only have to look!
