Great intro essay, thank you for sharing. I can relate to so much of what you wrote.

I too am an ex opiate addict and DMT helped me get the money off my back. I also have a helper entity that comes to me more often than not. She has even guided my hand with the lighter to the pipe once as I was getting sloppy from the onset of the previous 3 hits. She will give me hand signals to keep toking, and when to stop and put the Vg down. She then often claps and give me a thumbs up as she dissolves back into the ether and my journey begins.

She even came to me in a ceremony I did in the Amazon. I was so happy to see her and it blew my mind. It sounds to me like you have a helper assigned to you. i see them as case workers. They are quite special. Don't fear her appreciate her.

Welcome aboard mate,

Om