88
Rising Star
The Valley of Darkness:
Recently, I have had questions, concerns, fears even, regarding the nature of the entities, of the consciousness, we engage with Inside: I didn'tknow if they were good or evil, because sometimes I'm not sure.
My previous dream had come after a low dose of blue lotus/dream vine changa – at the time, I knew it wasn't quite enough, and the day dream had very dark undertones. The snakewoman abounded and she was pissed off with me, partly because of the low dose, but also because I had come in with unresolved problems in my life. As I was coming back out on that occasiob, I had felt hungry beings diving into my mouth, and trying to pull something out. I didn't know if they were taking something bad out of me, and healing me, or whether they were taking a piece of my soul.
This was the root of my concerns. But I knew there was only one way to find out – to go back.
So this time the biotechnology of choice was a very large bowl of Ayahuasca Android changa, a mixture of enhanced caapi and chaliponga. It delivered straight to the tryptamine palace, where the very stuff it is made of is itself conscious, multiple consciousnesses joined as one, existing and manifesting as a multidimensional plastic reality.
It was flipping around, roiling and oozing into anything … like quantum stem-cells, able to be whatever they want to be.
Or whatever I want it to be; because I am one of them. I am one of the consciousnesses that makes this hyperspatial plastic reality. It is not “them” - it is “us”.
I felt gratitude for what I was seeing – and immediately, the whole place smiled, exploded in pure joy. I'd recently bought some fresh cut daffodils, and they're in a vase next to my pilots seat, opening beautifully in their sweet electric yellow glory. Suddenly, the tryptamine palace was an explosion of daffodil-ness – I had brought them/us flowers and they fizzed with pure sweetness and joy. They were the manfestation of my gratitude. The sheer joy made me laugh out loud. Again, the whole place exploded in pure happiness …
'We LOVE gratitude! That's what we love! And joy!”
I knew then that it is our human capacity for joy and love and gratitude that they love about us. When my being was light, and full of joy, they responded and bathed in it, played with it, delighted in it, amplified it.
Then it was time for me to leave. Again, as always, I was squeezed out and to the right. Immediately, I was set upon by something hungry, trying to get inside me, into my mouth.
I said out loud: “if you are evil, then fuck off. FUCK OFF. You aren't getting into me.”
I opened my eyes. The dark spirits were pressed up against the membrane of my reality. By force of will, I held onto the feeling of joy I had before; I turned my head and my mind toward the light. But I knew I had to close my eyes and go back in.
“I'm ready. I am not afraid.”
I closed my eyes. I was being squeezed down a dark, fleshy, glassy tunnel. The tunnel itself was black, oily, corrosive, grotesque. It writhed and slithered and slipped and needed. It wanted to get inside of me. It was like a living sewer made of carnage and pure, black fear and dying flesh. An horrific, abominable place.
I know this sounds bizarre, theatrical and biblical - but this is what I said out loud:
“Though I walk through the valley of darkness, I will fear no evil. Because I am a warrior for the light, and for all that is good.”
I knew that the love and joy and gratitude in me, the delight in all that is good, protected me in this evil place. They/it could not harm me. They could not take me. Because I love what is good and light, evil cannot touch me or harm me.
I have no more fear of evil.
After a long time, I came out of the tunnel. I was purified by . I thanked the helper insects, who build the tunnels that connect our worlds. Love conquers all. Joy defeats darkness. The desire to give thanks is a bright light in the darkness, and the darkness cannot swallow or destroy the light.
Recently, I have had questions, concerns, fears even, regarding the nature of the entities, of the consciousness, we engage with Inside: I didn'tknow if they were good or evil, because sometimes I'm not sure.
My previous dream had come after a low dose of blue lotus/dream vine changa – at the time, I knew it wasn't quite enough, and the day dream had very dark undertones. The snakewoman abounded and she was pissed off with me, partly because of the low dose, but also because I had come in with unresolved problems in my life. As I was coming back out on that occasiob, I had felt hungry beings diving into my mouth, and trying to pull something out. I didn't know if they were taking something bad out of me, and healing me, or whether they were taking a piece of my soul.
This was the root of my concerns. But I knew there was only one way to find out – to go back.
So this time the biotechnology of choice was a very large bowl of Ayahuasca Android changa, a mixture of enhanced caapi and chaliponga. It delivered straight to the tryptamine palace, where the very stuff it is made of is itself conscious, multiple consciousnesses joined as one, existing and manifesting as a multidimensional plastic reality.
It was flipping around, roiling and oozing into anything … like quantum stem-cells, able to be whatever they want to be.
Or whatever I want it to be; because I am one of them. I am one of the consciousnesses that makes this hyperspatial plastic reality. It is not “them” - it is “us”.
I felt gratitude for what I was seeing – and immediately, the whole place smiled, exploded in pure joy. I'd recently bought some fresh cut daffodils, and they're in a vase next to my pilots seat, opening beautifully in their sweet electric yellow glory. Suddenly, the tryptamine palace was an explosion of daffodil-ness – I had brought them/us flowers and they fizzed with pure sweetness and joy. They were the manfestation of my gratitude. The sheer joy made me laugh out loud. Again, the whole place exploded in pure happiness …
'We LOVE gratitude! That's what we love! And joy!”
I knew then that it is our human capacity for joy and love and gratitude that they love about us. When my being was light, and full of joy, they responded and bathed in it, played with it, delighted in it, amplified it.
Then it was time for me to leave. Again, as always, I was squeezed out and to the right. Immediately, I was set upon by something hungry, trying to get inside me, into my mouth.
I said out loud: “if you are evil, then fuck off. FUCK OFF. You aren't getting into me.”
I opened my eyes. The dark spirits were pressed up against the membrane of my reality. By force of will, I held onto the feeling of joy I had before; I turned my head and my mind toward the light. But I knew I had to close my eyes and go back in.
“I'm ready. I am not afraid.”
I closed my eyes. I was being squeezed down a dark, fleshy, glassy tunnel. The tunnel itself was black, oily, corrosive, grotesque. It writhed and slithered and slipped and needed. It wanted to get inside of me. It was like a living sewer made of carnage and pure, black fear and dying flesh. An horrific, abominable place.
I know this sounds bizarre, theatrical and biblical - but this is what I said out loud:
“Though I walk through the valley of darkness, I will fear no evil. Because I am a warrior for the light, and for all that is good.”
I knew that the love and joy and gratitude in me, the delight in all that is good, protected me in this evil place. They/it could not harm me. They could not take me. Because I love what is good and light, evil cannot touch me or harm me.
I have no more fear of evil.
After a long time, I came out of the tunnel. I was purified by . I thanked the helper insects, who build the tunnels that connect our worlds. Love conquers all. Joy defeats darkness. The desire to give thanks is a bright light in the darkness, and the darkness cannot swallow or destroy the light.
