Crucial
Rising Star
After reading the welcome sticky, and several initial posts (and corresponding replies) I sat here long, staring hard at the computer screen trying to discern salient points that seem to draw the most report.
Then I though about what would I say as an introduction; a convincing soliloquy? I'm not that poetic, nor that self aware....
Then I thought about the intellectual attack. Would I be able to dazzle them with brilliance? More like baffle them with bull shit... Humm......
After much genuine thought, I had a most frightening revelation.... what If I just was my self? But where does one start up a conversation with strangers (awkward enough), about a fairly socially unacceptable topic (nearly suicide in some circles, even if just socially) and do so in a way where one would be taken as genuine, but not boisterous, sincere but not patronizing?
Well I am "Crucial" and I am here today as just one moment in a journey that started several years ago. Starting off as more of an act to declare "FTW", a 20 something young man tried his first illegal substance.... MDMA... not being one to be happy with the hedonistic pleasures, I had to do research on what it was that I was doing to my body. I've been "educated" on all the common drugs in school and the harm they would do! But what is this "ecstasy", it was legal, so how bad can it be?
Needless to say I was introduced to "Sasha" Shulgin, as anyone would be, who did any half decent research on MDMA. I picked up Pihkal in the early 90's and read it in earnest.... now most of my peers of the time would just not endure the thick paperback, but I found it completely fascinating. I learned a new word, "entheogen" and new way of looking at the world. From there came and went many firsts in my life and I slowly but effectively deprogramed my self from the D.A.R.E. mythology, and replaced their wash with factual knowledge about avenues I had never before knew was even an option.
We'll fast forward to reading Dr Strassman's book, which was my real, substantial introduction to DMT. It was Dr Strassman who I credit with my dedicated interest in DMT based on the religious influence he placed on the pineal gland and DMT. Having been raised a Baptist, and turning, self proclaimed, an Agnostic his hypothesis fit either my own beliefs, or at a minimum my own desires.
My life has slowed substantially, and yet gained so much. I'm once again an upstanding, contributing member of society. My day's of pushing the envelope are over and I have things to focus on ( such as a family). However the lessons learned while growing and expanding in directions that were neither common nor recommended by the masses has stayed with me. I do things for my own self awareness, my own therapy and my own spirituality. I do partake of the occasional, self procured sacred fungi, which is how I wondered to the Nexus. I am active on some mycology boards where the Nexus was dropped from time to time as a point of interest for those seeking more than the mighty "shroom". I know some of those people there on those boards are active here and if you recognize my avatar do feel free to say hello. I am by no means this long winded as a general rule, quite the opposite in fact. I rarely contribute much more than accolades to others success. I'm not one who enjoys the sound of my own voice so despite this arduous initial posting, I don't post for the sake of posting. When I have something to contribute that might actually have some bearing, I don't mind doing so... but my status in life and on these boards are measured by my input, not my quantity of posts. I would however appreciate the opportunity to include my 2 cents here and there, as well as offer the occasional food for thought my self.
On can effectively gain all the knowledge needed to be successful by just reading the files and posts on this unique forum. But one cannot expand at ones own pace nor can one assist in the expansion of the over all knowledge base by being passive. For this reason I'd appreciate the opportunity to engage in discussions herein. I would be honord to be invited, and thus humbly submit this eclectic array of my own ramblings for your consideration.
Then I though about what would I say as an introduction; a convincing soliloquy? I'm not that poetic, nor that self aware....
Then I thought about the intellectual attack. Would I be able to dazzle them with brilliance? More like baffle them with bull shit... Humm......
After much genuine thought, I had a most frightening revelation.... what If I just was my self? But where does one start up a conversation with strangers (awkward enough), about a fairly socially unacceptable topic (nearly suicide in some circles, even if just socially) and do so in a way where one would be taken as genuine, but not boisterous, sincere but not patronizing?
Well I am "Crucial" and I am here today as just one moment in a journey that started several years ago. Starting off as more of an act to declare "FTW", a 20 something young man tried his first illegal substance.... MDMA... not being one to be happy with the hedonistic pleasures, I had to do research on what it was that I was doing to my body. I've been "educated" on all the common drugs in school and the harm they would do! But what is this "ecstasy", it was legal, so how bad can it be?
Needless to say I was introduced to "Sasha" Shulgin, as anyone would be, who did any half decent research on MDMA. I picked up Pihkal in the early 90's and read it in earnest.... now most of my peers of the time would just not endure the thick paperback, but I found it completely fascinating. I learned a new word, "entheogen" and new way of looking at the world. From there came and went many firsts in my life and I slowly but effectively deprogramed my self from the D.A.R.E. mythology, and replaced their wash with factual knowledge about avenues I had never before knew was even an option.
We'll fast forward to reading Dr Strassman's book, which was my real, substantial introduction to DMT. It was Dr Strassman who I credit with my dedicated interest in DMT based on the religious influence he placed on the pineal gland and DMT. Having been raised a Baptist, and turning, self proclaimed, an Agnostic his hypothesis fit either my own beliefs, or at a minimum my own desires.
My life has slowed substantially, and yet gained so much. I'm once again an upstanding, contributing member of society. My day's of pushing the envelope are over and I have things to focus on ( such as a family). However the lessons learned while growing and expanding in directions that were neither common nor recommended by the masses has stayed with me. I do things for my own self awareness, my own therapy and my own spirituality. I do partake of the occasional, self procured sacred fungi, which is how I wondered to the Nexus. I am active on some mycology boards where the Nexus was dropped from time to time as a point of interest for those seeking more than the mighty "shroom". I know some of those people there on those boards are active here and if you recognize my avatar do feel free to say hello. I am by no means this long winded as a general rule, quite the opposite in fact. I rarely contribute much more than accolades to others success. I'm not one who enjoys the sound of my own voice so despite this arduous initial posting, I don't post for the sake of posting. When I have something to contribute that might actually have some bearing, I don't mind doing so... but my status in life and on these boards are measured by my input, not my quantity of posts. I would however appreciate the opportunity to include my 2 cents here and there, as well as offer the occasional food for thought my self.
On can effectively gain all the knowledge needed to be successful by just reading the files and posts on this unique forum. But one cannot expand at ones own pace nor can one assist in the expansion of the over all knowledge base by being passive. For this reason I'd appreciate the opportunity to engage in discussions herein. I would be honord to be invited, and thus humbly submit this eclectic array of my own ramblings for your consideration.
Thats a definite genuine essay! Welcome 
