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Crumbles

Rising Star
a lingering euphoria still permeates Crumbles' being.
it has been almost a week since my exploration and i still enjoy a profound sense of calm and beauty.
this was my first journey with the LOVE Brigade and boy did i need my fellow travelers for this one.

Things started out very peaceful, Crumbles was in a safe place with warm and loving souls: A healing room with eleven candles.
Tranquil. Holy. Unstuck In Time.
Uncle Knucles suggested Crumbles take this journey with 15mgs of sublingual caapi copy, to which he obliged.
The caapi goes under his tongue and is ingested into the bloodstream through the mouth tissue.
After about fifteen minutes the caapi is tasting pretty craapi (haha) but I focus my mind on the journey to come, forcing myself not to swallow.
Some tea is brought to sooth the sulfuric sensation going on in my mouth.

After another ten minutes, Art loads the Vapor Genie with spice crystals over Electric Sheep, around 70mg of spice total.
I decide to hold the pipe and inhale with a sleep mask over my eyes:
Something about seeing the VG turn into a red polygonal serpent held little appeal.
The first hit sinks deeply into my lungs; by the time I exhale, the geometric shapes began to appear.
I come back to the pipe for a second hit but could not hold it very long.
Crumbles was experiencing some kind of blockage.
I had not broken through.
What I saw was just the tiniest taste of a vivid trip.
There was a sense of awe, wonder and loads of fractalized stars and shapes.
Bright colors, vague entities were visible, but it did not last long and Crumbles was aware of his physical shell for most of the ten minutes.
There was no communion with the everything.
Most likely, Crumbles got excited when things started to dissolve and change color.
I began anticipating where the trip was going and was not willing to surrender completely.
Maybe I was focused on work concerns, maybe he was thinking about something in the news, but at the first hint of the astral realm, i forgot about the need to hold in two deep hits.
Return to earth occurs within ten minutes.
I endeavor to identify and expunge those weaknesses while Antrocles reminds me, "You wanted this. This is what you are seeking."
Antrocles estimates I imbibed about 30-35mg of spice for this initial try.

Art reminds him that the caapi is still good for another hour or so if he wants to try again.
Crumbles says yes.
He wants to go.
Really GO.

Second attempt: Deep breathing and meditation precede this attempt.
Art reloads the VG
Also this time Crumbles only sat up and took his hits.
Members of the LOVE Brigade help stabilize, hold the VG, and control the sleep mask
The first hit. In she goes.
Antrocles' voice is like a mantra: "Deep As You Can."
Here comes the difficult part.
This time rather than seeing things turn serpentine and dissolve away, Crumbles exhales, sees things start to separate and expand, then says YES to himself, returns to the VG for hit two as Art pulls down Crumbles' mask over his eyes. "Deep As You Can"
He concentrates solely on closing his eyes under the mask.
At this point he hears Antrocles calmly beckoning, "Take One More" and the second exhale is released.
This precipitates what can best be described as maroon and green lizard-like shapes and patterns all interwoven a la M.C. Escher.
This pattern grows more and more fractal-like as Antrocles calls Crumbles back for the third hit.
He remembers his lips meeting the VG but at this point numbers, time, identity all hold no meaning.
If there was a third hit, Crumbles has no recollection of imbibing it.
Concentrate on breathing.
Just breathing.
Deep As You Can.
Before he knows it, Crumbles has left his body, rocketed through the tunnel and is flying through hyperspace.

(The LOVE Brigade estimates Crumbles got a 50-60mg dose of spice in these three hits.)

The Carrier Wave was more of a low buzz than the deafening drone from my first journey, but it persisted up until I removed my mask.
Once Inside... the welcome was more loving and intense than any sensation or I have ever experienced.
Strangely, it is a place I recognize. From pre-birth? From my last break through? Am I looking into the future?
Perhaps all of the above.
At any rate, it is registers as an interdimensional deja vu: "Welcome Back!" the universe tells me.
I was welcomed by a host of smiling entities, what some have described as alien examiners, for my reasons I will call the Life Force.
A warm watery sensation enveloped me.
It was similar to my first journey in hyperspace, though this time I did not feel my soul in the judgment seat.
The Life Force fervently approved my essence and I was welcomed me quickly into the enlightened state.

Most of the time was spent in this state, a place I can best describe as the The Room, where all was pristine, shiny and interactive.
There were other beings there and I was able to communicate saying "Yes, Show Me More."
Keep in mind. There is plenty to see. The Room has indecipherable patterns like hieroglyphics swarming and scrolling in and out of everything.
It is a place of wonder and exultation. Sensory Overload. Smiles, laughter and tingling for eons.
As the smiling entities worshipped me, I worshipped them, thanking them for letting me die in such a resplendent eternity.
I remember thinking (maybe saying audibly) "I Am Dead and I Am Okay" over and over.

My guides told me afterward that I had been speaking in tongues. Groovy.

As opposed to my first journey into hyperspace, where I felt myself rocketed at breakneck speed through a series of landscapes, tunnels and various consciousnesses before landing in The Room, this experience took place almost entirely in that colorful fellowship space.
I was reminded of the Apostle John's description of Heaven in the book of Revelation, where the streets were comprised of all sorts of precious gems.
It really felt like a party in my honor.
And to think I forgot to bring a covered dish!
Thanks to the caapi copy, it was quite a prolonged epiphany, centered on pockets of light and color swirling, morphing, expanding and exploding. Their magnetic glow drew me along like a carrot on a stick.
Each time I said Yes I was further dissolved: I felt like a grain of sand on a beach or a strand of DNA in a giant nucleus.
As I explored each wormhole it felt as though the Universe was downloading tiny packets of infallible truth and goodness into my soul.
Strangely the points at which I felt the most dangerous and voyeuristic -as though I were experiencing something I shouldn't- were easily the most rewarding.
These were the times that the orgasmic hyper-consciousness would swell and permeate my being, saturating me with inexplicable ecstasy.
Said wormholes appeared as hypnotic eddies of color and sound that grew increasingly entrancing and heartbreaking.
The kaleidoscopic effects were more pronounced and elongated in these wormholes, presumably due to the caapi.

From inside it felt like I was weeping for joy, but these ejaculations evidently manifested themselves as blood-curdling screams.
At Art's request, Antrocles summoned me back to the physical realm through the use of a 528 Hz bell tone, the healing frequency.
When the bell started to ring I felt myself slowly regaining awareness of the earthly plane: the sleep mask, the pillows, the bed, my guides...
Upon removing the mask I felt very much a part of both worlds.
The first face I remember accessing was Art. Apparently he was concerned that I had gone too deep.
He smiled at me, emanating compassion, beauty and warmth which I reciprocated with a smile.
I tried to reassure him verbally from within the astral realm, but I don't think I was coherent at that point; I may have worried him more!
Hieroglyphics and Matrix-like lines of code formed a holographic blueprint connecting me with their world.
I could see my fellow travelers watching me through the mist: a beatific display but my speech was still stifled.
Kid_eternity reached out his hand and I responded by grasping it, trying to transfer the love I was feeling.
Antrocles continued to ring the bell at regular intervals.
These points of contact triggered a sense of safety and I felt even more ready to die again.
Upon realizing my suspension between realms I pulled the mask down for one last communion with the everything.
The entities slowly morphed back into the gooey tapestry of The Room as I was left with rising awareness of various truths:

Share Your Light With Those In Darkness. Sing Sing Sing Your Song As Loudly And Joyfully As Possible. Share Create Love Relentlessly!

Like I mentioned earlier, there was no scrutiny from a sage or sentient being, no painful self-realization: This was total celebration.
I felt like the Third Eye was my Only Eye, that the Life Force was worshipping me, affirming my essence, bolstering my spirit.
After my first journey I had tried hard to make sense of the entities I met.
They appeared as kittens before and this time they were slightly more humanoid but nothing like I had expected either time.
Maybe they weren't disparate entities but phantasmal glimpses or incarnations of the eternal miracle that is myself.


Upon returning to my corporeal shell, I removed the mask, my eyes drawn to a luminous presence in front of me.
There sat Antrocles, stoic and strong like an Easter Island statue.
He was seated in Baddha Konasana, emanating an electromagnetic force field that would have been terrifying had I not realized that the field was emanating from myself into the room.
We locked eyes and he asked me questions about what I saw, what I was seeing.
Strangely I do not remember my answers; all I can recall is the intense serenity on his face and the chiseled fortitude of his spirit.
Looking into his stare I felt like a vessel, a ferryman suspended between two realms; just a profound sense of effortless awakening.
Never have I experienced a more humbling blessing.

The warm glow extended to the other members of the LOVE Brigade. It was an absolutely sublime sight, five strong souls connected by the sparkly holographic tissue and a golden aura. I made eye contact with each of them, thanking them for shepherding my journey, for loving me and allowing me to explore a spiritual connection of this magnitude.

Once the sensations subsided, Crumbles found his voice and asked sheepishly "Did I get the third hit?"
The room exploded in uproarious laughter and they patted him on the back saying:

"Yeah, you could say that. You've been gone for almost an hour. Did some deep work in there."

Wow! An hour in hyperspace. Felt like a mere twenty seconds.

Apparently Crumbles went somewhere special.

namaste
Cx
 
Wow, Crumbles. Outstanding report. I can personally vouche for the third hit. :shock:

I can safely say that was THE most ecstatic and terrifying breakthrough I've ever witnessed (from the outside anyway). It wasn't so much the blood-curdling screams as it was the impression that you had simply gone away for good. I actually had to get up and leave the room at several points, as I felt so horribly responsible for having clearly fried your noodle. It truly looked like an exorcism, or what I imagine it might have been to watch Joan of Arc sizzling at the stake - and it just went on and on and on. Add in the screaming, the hysterical laughter, the thrashing and gutteral orgasm moans, and honestly... you scared the bejeesus out of me. I'm SO glad you are so okay.

I salute your courage and fortitude, my friend. You are a soldier of LOVE. Carry those messages into this world and you'll be the happier for it.
 
Thank you so much for sharing this - you have the gift of telling, this is truly a beautiful report, of an awesome experience. Welcome aboard, Crumbles - namaste
 
nice write up and experience man. Congratulations! :)

its comforting having good people around during those first steps into hyperspace. Not too sure about the bell though lol, I know I wouldn't have appreciated that, but from the sounds of it your fellow travelers were getting quite worried. My advice to them is... dont! When has no one ever came back? We always do and all the better for it.

One love bro
 
Amazing report, Crumbles! SWIM cannot imagine nearly an hour straight spent traveling through hyperspace. And can imagine Art's worry!
 
Im so glad you had people with you, sounds absolutely incredible.. What a GREAT write up!!!

Its awesome that you shared the experience with members from Nexus!! Wow!

Awesome!
 
I've gotta say, I had nothin' to do with that bell - that was pure, unadulterated Antrocles. It was rattling me, so I can only imagine how it must have sounded to Crumbles. I was pacing relentlessly in the next room by the time he busted it out.
 
I know what its like to introduce someone to this wonder and see them struggle with it (or appear to be stuggling) and its not nice at all... so I feel for ya there bro.

One time I set someone up real nice for a blast off, thoroughly explained what to expect as much as one can when dealing with the molecule (collidoscopes and blind men :)) their first was sub-breakthrough... later on decided to venture further to see more. I've honestly never felt more guilty seeing someone I deeply care about rocking back and forth, clutching their head like they were fresh out the mental hospital.
I wanted to interviene and make it better, I was angry with the molecule for not blessing them with love and big smilles like the rest I've chosen to share with. Thankfully it was the most profound and beautiful thing said person had ever experienced... but beleive me, it did not look that way.

I was brought back from a journey premeturely once and felt like I couldn't integrate it properly because it was incomplete, and somewhat confusing to come back from early. It wasn't anyones fault though... the sound of someone clicking a lighter crashed through my visual canvas like a sledge hammer. Senses are amplified extremely with spice.
 
you've got a gift with the language my brother. powerful journey to be sure....none of us were expecting that. the deeper off you sailed, the more i dug my heels in to stay with you. the first half-hour of screams and thrashing was easy to roll with....but after nearly an hour it became clear that you were much farther than any of us had previously entertained.

art coming in and out of the room stating, "this is freaking me the fuck out" and "this guy's having a fucking psychotic break" didn't help... :?

in the end, i was guided to my 528Hz tibetan prayer bowl. with rhythmic toning (about 11 seconds between rings), i literally watched as you found your bearings and slowly made your way back home. i've never put so much into holding a space (or holding a spirit for that matter!). i wasn't even under the immediate control of the spirit molecule, but i swear that when you sat up and opened your eyes and we faced each other and locked eyes for what seemed like an eternity, i felt as though i was with you in a place other than the healing room our bodies were parked in. you went deep, little brother....and your journey was a gift to me as well!

i've worked with quite a few spirit warriors at this point and i can honestly say without a shadow of a doubt that your journey was truly a one-of-a-kind...

just like you.. ;)

WITH THE DEEPEST LOVE AND GRATITUDE
 
Jeez. Give me a public dressing down why don't you, my brother from another mother. I could have been less reactive for sure, but aside from whispering my concerns in your ear, I think I was pretty much silent.
 
Literally... HOLY shit what a ride! That was an amazing report, it seriously brought a little tear in the corner of my eye. I am happy for you fellow traveler, thank you so much for sharing this - it made my day.
 
Wow!! You guys are great!! This has to be one of the most entertaining, beautiful threads I've ever read on the Nexus. Congratulations to all of you for the beauty that you've given all of us!
 
Wow that's an awesome experience Crumbles, I envy all of you, someday I wish to be acknowledged from beyond just as you were, congratulations on an amazing experience on your first journey through hyperspace. I really need to get that kind of support. :)
 
hello fellow wanderers -

Thank you for all your kind words. This was truly an indescribable experience, though obviously i did all i could to elucidate it in detail. It made me realize how full of color, love and friendship our lives in this ephemeral realm can and should be. The lesson I take from this journey and the comments you all left is this: The Eternal Soul is a vast neon multi-dimensional and all-encompassing smile. (Note the new avatar photo :D )

Love Life. Let Our Soul Shine Brightly!

XOXO
Cx
 
It's reports like this that make me believe that my work has only scratched the surface. Sounds like I need to give caapi copy a try; maybe I'll go looking for some vendors this week.

You most definitely sound like the right kind of guy for a trip of that depth. I hope I'll be brave enough to let go to that extreme sometime soon, your experience sounded wonderfully rewarding. This post has inspired me to try to go even deeper. Maybe I'll get back to it this weekend! =)
 
Wow what a beautiful write up Crumbles! That is very reminiscent of the first time I hit hyperspace. Everything you said was so on point where I remember going that time, it really took me back. But an hour! Wow man, and I thought 15 min was forever haha.

But congratulations on the breakthroughs. It sounds like you were really listening and respected what the molecule wanted to teach you; taking you deeper into the universal hyperspace mystery that connect us all. I loved how you quoted John in Revelation about the description of heaven with shinning streets celebrating your arrival. I've always wondered if Revelations was entheogen inspired...
 
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