What did i just have seen?

[tracid1987]

My friends... i can barely type, shocked by the awe.

I am new to this portal running... my first tiny dose was without scale, just a bit, i had slight visuals but it also had a very slight hyperspace feeling to it. it was weak.

I was afraid to try big dosage, so i measured approx 15-17mg (that goddamn scale is changing over time ) and vaped all in one hit with The Machine (a bit i had exhaled without getting it absorbed so it was then a bit less than 15-17mg).

Then in a sudden it was hitting me, so hard, a was half here, half in a holographic world full of enitites. they were so playful and interested in me. they were in my room and in my mind, but it was happening so fast i can not remember any picture of them. Only what i remember is that they tried to teach me how to let myself with the flow since i was so shocked i didnt know what to do-i was not afraid, i didnt have time to get afraid since it was happening so fast.they were all there, trying to communicate then it started to fade away in a few minutes, maybe two minutes only.

Maaaaan, it was so intense, wtf :O

I am writing now because i would like to ask you for some advice how to proceed deeper. But please dont write like "up your dose and go hard", i would like to understand what was going on since according to the reports, small dose causes visuals, then breakthrough dose sucks you into the hyperspace, and there you can encounter entities. But this was a small dose, i was here but full of playful entities around me, inside me. and it was very intense. No hyperspace feeling to it, like this world overlapped by a holographic space. and ultra-hyper fast paced. Why i cannot remember anything? (except that they tried to teach me how to navigate there). It has an ayahuasca character to it, understandable due to DMT.

I just cant imagine to up this dose to 25mg. Or this was the threshold and i have to break through this and there will be totally different experience?

Please, try to give me more focused and constructive advise how to proceed and what was this level.

Thank you a lot

 

[ETERNAL]

If you want to proceed deeper i'll tell you exactly what's going on. Absolutely nothing. This is all dream stuff. Those entities are no more real than you are. There are no separate people, things, time or space. Everything is empty of separateness. You are awareness in this moment, happening now, a verb that is never complete. There is nothing to be learned from DMT. This ISness is aware of its non dual nature and can awaken itself in any moment. It doesn't need a catalyst to realize what it already knows." There are no catalysts. There is no DMT, acid, mushrooms, elves, entities, people, places, space or time. Any experiences you have as a person are illusory. Everything is one. There is nothing to learn or understand. Hope this helps.

 

[Northerner]

Okay, I'll counter those truths with "alternate truths".

It's all real. What you have seen is a gateway into infinity and through the dimensions, there is much to be learned inside if you tread carefully. Belief is an illusion but your perception now is the only reality that counts. For all intents and purposes what you see is real. When you go deeper you will be confronted by the pool of endless questions. There is more to reflect on there and more alternate realities than you dreamed possible. Everything is connected in an intrinsic way and everything you are doing you have already done and all possibilities are definitive outcomes.



That said... a more personal message tracid.

When you keep your eyes open with DMT the dimensions overlay on what you see here, until a point. When you close your eyes you open the gates. You close down your perception of the "here" and give more power to the "there".
You can't remember anything because the stimulus is so strong. It's something you can experience but rarely something you can truly bring back. Only flashes and highlights will remain, the boundless complexity of the DMT experience is truly elusive to capture.
You only had a small taste of what there is to offer. In some ways smaller doses with eyes open are much more scary than larger doses with eyes closed. But as you weren't scared there's no issue. If you doubled your last dose you would probably think for a moment you killed yourself, then it would all be ripped away. Everything here would cease to exist, only you would continue. But not you as you know you. Not your body. Only you.

It's an interesting experience, and not for the faint of heart. If that sort of thing suits you proceed with caution, otherwise you have just seen the gates and you don't have to proceed. Inside is infinitely more complex and immersive. A million fantasies and a million nightmares rolled into a flashing moment of truth/illusion.

 

[DmnStr8]

You will go deeper when you choose it, when you are ready. Let it all sink in and go when you feel like you want to see the deeper end of what DMT has to offer. It takes some courage and a good amount of simply letting go. Build up these two things within and it can be a much easier experience. Take your time with it. There is no rush.

I find that I enjoy the higher dose experiences more. Lighter doses always felt like one foot here and one there, I like to be all there during the experience. It's just my preference. It feels more comfortable to me. I have taken the attitude of what ever comes, comes. I accept it all and let it go as much as possible afterward. Messages received, I filter and keep the ones that empower me in my life, now. Anything that causes fear or disempowers me, I let it go as best I can.

How far we all go is a very personal choice. You may not like the deeper journeys, then again, you may love it as I do. It can be such a wonderful experience. It is an odd terrain that take some practice to walk in. Practice is maybe not the best word here. I just feel like it is not such a shock anymore. I just accept it all and cherish every experience. Give gratitude and release fear!

Not sure if anything I ever say on here is ever helpful. Sometimes I feel like I live on my own planet! LMAO!

Good luck on your future journeys!!

 

[tracid1987]

Thank you mates. Your words are very helpful and encouraging.

Now i remember i was really afraid. But it was happening so fast,i was so shocked i didnt have time to realize i am afraid. And i remember the playful entities were trying to tell me: come on! Breath deep and allow it to happen! And why are you holding that lighter in your hands? (they tried to tell me that i have to empty my hands and relax my body). But again, i tell i it was breathtaking,literally. I remember i could not relax and breath deep but not because i didnt want to but because i was shocked to the maximum by the intensity.

I know people are always telling you must let it happen,surrender to the experience,release fear,etc. But i find it difficult. And i tell it why: that first dose with slight visuals was slow like the sober mind flow rate. I started to feel fear building up inside me, but as i started to relax and concentrate on letting it happen,the fear started to fade away. I could control the situation very well.

But this time, it was so intense and fast i could not manage to find a way to apply.this technique.i know what i have to do but kind of like when you sit in a roller coaster and all you are able to do is to just hold on and graspbecause you dont have time to do anything else.
I tried my best to relax then the scene changed and it was all lost.

The key may be the bigger dosage. Maybe if i try a bigger one i will realize the experience is so much more different that my previous attempt to relax on a lower dose will make no sense on the bigger dose.

Its so beautiful,but scary as hell we humans are crazy to play with such substances

Edit: people are able to nicely recall their experiences, the environment they have been in,the entities,how they look like,etc. Me,nothing. Small dose,very small, and no picture of thr experience except the message... Hope this changes with bigger dose

Thank you again for your comments

 

[tseuq]

@ETERNAL, Northerner & DmnStr8; Really beautiful, guys!

I know people are always telling you must let it happen,surrender to the experience,release fear,etc. But i find it difficult.

Have you ever took a shower with ice cold water? It can be pretty thrilling. So now imagine to set up a mindset of:

"This is just pure bliss and really wholesome for myself."

What I experience is, that I stay open, calm and relaxed and really enjoy and fully feel the cold water and its triggering body sensations (f.e. sparkling feeling, skin contraction,..). This is just so refreshing, like a decent DMT trip. :lol:

When talking about "surrender to the experience", we can just be with it, with all of our love, sincerity, trust and openness and THIS is not something exclusively for a psychedelic experience but for our whole life, NOW!

All the best to us, tseuq

 

[DmnStr8]

Thank you mates. Your words are very helpful and encouraging.

Now i remember i was really afraid. But it was happening so fast,i was so shocked i didnt have time to realize i am afraid. And i remember the playful entities were trying to tell me: come on! Breath deep and allow it to happen! And why are you holding that lighter in your hands? (they tried to tell me that i have to empty my hands and relax my body). But again, i tell i it was breathtaking,literally. I remember i could not relax and breath deep but not because i didnt want to but because i was shocked to the maximum by the intensity.

I know people are always telling you must let it happen,surrender to the experience,release fear,etc. But i find it difficult. And i tell it why: that first dose with slight visuals was slow like the sober mind flow rate. I started to feel fear building up inside me, but as i started to relax and concentrate on letting it happen,the fear started to fade away. I could control the situation very well.

But this time, it was so intense and fast i could not manage to find a way to apply.this technique.i know what i have to do but kind of like when you sit in a roller coaster and all you are able to do is to just hold on and graspbecause you dont have time to do anything else.
I tried my best to relax then the scene changed and it was all lost.

The key may be the bigger dosage. Maybe if i try a bigger one i will realize the experience is so much more different that my previous attempt to relax on a lower dose will make no sense on the bigger dose.

Its so beautiful,but scary as hell we humans are crazy to play with such substances

Edit: people are able to nicely recall their experiences, the environment they have been in,the entities,how they look like,etc. Me,nothing. Small dose,very small, and no picture of thr experience except the message... Hope this changes with bigger dose

Thank you again for your comments

I find fear will fade away as you mentioned during the experience. Sometimes I wonder why I was fearful at all. I have also found that it has not faded and remains the entire journey. That is when I go into the fear and look at it. I give gratitude for the fear and what it teaches me. I release it after the trip. It is a wonderful thing to even be alive and have these emotions. Fear is just as important as love. They both deserve gratitude. The both require a certain letting go.

 

[ETERNAL]

Okay, I'll counter those truths with "alternate truths".

It's all real. What you have seen is a gateway into infinity and through the dimensions, there is much to be learned inside if you tread carefully. Belief is an illusion but your perception now is the only reality that counts. For all intents and purposes what you see is real. When you go deeper you will be confronted by the pool of endless questions. There is more to reflect on there and more alternate realities than you dreamed possible. Everything is connected in an intrinsic way and everything you are doing you have already done and all possibilities are definitive outcomes.

I just noticed this.

Duality is the “dream in consciousness”, an imaginary subset of infinity. The “I” that can believe in different dimensions, gateways, alternate realities or a dream separate from the dreamer, is illusory. The harder and deeper a "self" looks into the illusion the more the thinking mind try's to make sense of the illusion and pull some mystical truth/meaning out of it. It's easy to think there is some truth to be found by doing dmt and if you could only remember it when you come back it will make your life better, but it's nonsense. everything is that truth. everything is one.
The moment the imagining or conceptualization stops and there is silence, infinity is restored. The “I” as a separate thing blinks out. Then there is only “this” and “now”. Nothing "you" do will make your life any different, there is no "you" to have a life. Nothing is 'happening" here, only 100% awareness, presence, non duality, the eternal all. There are no truths to be found in duality, there is nowhere to look for it, there is no-one to seek for it. The truth has always been what it has always been. EVERYTHING IS ONE. This is what enlightenment is. The realization that the true nature of everything is non dual.
Don't take this the wrong way Northerner, I'm not talking shit, I'm just trying to save you from chasing your tail. I did it for years. Asking why why why and believing that what i experienced as a self was real, thinking i'm learning truths, is a complete waste of time. The point is there are no separate things to interact with each other. Everything is always perfect now. There is nothing to understand, life is a meaningless dream. All there is is everything and now.

 

[Northerner]

I'm not offended at all ETERNAL, I find both opposing points of view very interesting to consider and do not consider either of them false, nor true. I only juxtaposed those ideas because you stated your opinions as facts. Though they are not.

It's in the eye of the beholder. Though it is clear you have found your truth, your truth is not my truth though. What you think is your reality creates your reality, thoughts are real in this way.. and your thoughts are not necessarily true for all others.

Even your quasi-nihilistic views create your truth, for you, rather than being something that is real. You see?

My take on enlightenment is different from yours as well... go figure.

 

[ETERNAL]

You see?

All I see is an illusion.

 

[Northerner]

You see?

All I see is an illusion.

I find perception as a persistent momentary truth, rather than an actual illusion or meaningless paradox. But that's just me.

There was a man. He had a rock. That rock provided everything for him if he asked. He loved the rock and in return the rock fulfilled his wishes and gave solace in his deepest despair. To that man that rock was God. He died with his rock and was buried with it.

Illusion or reality?

It's an outrageous analogy of how perceptions create truth, how self generated truths are for all intents and purposes real. To me the man looks like he is a fool, probably to you too. But not to him, to him he had everything. He lived and died with an all fulfilling God.

Could this present to us that we find our own meaning in life? Or that we should dismiss everything as illusion and pointless? Do we find our one true rock and cling to it? (or several if we feel like it) Or just accept that rocks are ultimately pointless and forgo them all? Or varying degrees of owning rocks and denying the rocks even exist? :lol:

The question about this approach is not why, but how.

 

[dreaminggiraffe]

I find fear will fade away as you mentioned during the experience. Sometimes I wonder why I was fearful at all.

I definitely agree with this. I go into it with an increased heart rate and sweaty palms, but I come out of it laughing at myself and asking “why was I so afraid to do that?!” more often than not. If only I could tap into that feeling while preparing for my trip.

 

[5A8R3]

You see?

All I see is an illusion.

You remind me of that point where Siddhartha is bitter that all he sees is an illusion, a temptation of desire.
It is true my friend, yet it is the world we live in for now. DMT has never told me why and I don't expect it ever will.
I recommend you read the story of Siddhartha if you haven't already.

 

[ETERNAL]

It is true my friend, yet it is the world we live in for now.

All I see in this moment is "I". There is no "we".

DMT has never told me why and I don't expect it ever will.

This IS-ness never needed doing.

 

[tseuq]

It is true my friend, yet it is the world we live in for now.

All I see in this moment is "I". There is no "we".

DMT has never told me why and I don't expect it ever will.

This IS-ness never needed doing.

Who knows why the voice from non separateness persists in replying to this nonsense you are typing up. ...

I am talking to myself.

There is nothing to learn or understand.

Still (has quite a lot of different definitions), tseuq

 

[ETERNAL]

Still (has quite a lot of different definitions), tseuq

Indeed
All i can do is point at what IS.
Does exist, can't be explained.
The understanding is the same. THIS/NOW/ONE. Presence,awareness,consciousness "I".

 

[Northerner]

My daughter just commented that your avatar is not right ETERNAL.

When I asked why she said that the eyes should be higher. :lol:

 

[ETERNAL]

My daughter just commented that your avatar is not right ETERNAL.
When I asked why she said that the eyes should be higher. :lol:

Tell her my avatar is as real as she is. She can't tell the difference because she is a subject/object/illusion as well.

 

[Northerner]

My daughter just commented that your avatar is not right ETERNAL.
When I asked why she said that the eyes should be higher. :lol:

Tell her my avatar is as real as she is. She can't tell the difference because she is a subject/object/illusion as well.

Nihilism is a little intense for a 9 year old. I'll skip.

edit:...

You miss a fundamental truth ETERNAL.

You are having a spiritual experience right now.

This is the spiritual experience. Every single moment.

Don't deny your own awareness.

 

[ETERNAL]

You are having a spiritual experience right now.

This is the spiritual experience. Every single moment.

Don't deny your own awareness.

Hilarious Northerner, but only in the dream, only in the dream.
Everything is one. There is no-one to "have" a spiritual experience.
There is only THIS moment.
There is only ONE awareness.
Those that think they are having a spiritual experience are NOT awakened.
This "experience" has nothing to do with a 'me".

The fundamental truth you are missing is that everything is ONE. There is no you to have a "spiritual" experience.
That is nonsense, dream stuff.
There are no spirits or souls. ANYTHING that appears to be separate in consciousness is an illusion.