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Why I'm Here!!!

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Lifes True Sceptic

Lifes True Sceptic

Rising Star
Forgive me if i ramble on, but i feel the need to explain how i come to be here today, asking the questions that i do!

I am a 46 year old englishman who until recently lived life in blissful ignorance of the world around him. At some point beyond my 40th year i slowly became aware of the beauty of the planet we inhabit, and the evil & corruption that dwells upon it. I started questioning all the things that so called authority figures told me was the truth about life/history. I've always believed in something beyond our existence but always shunned religion as it perpetrates too much violence/corruption/misery. As my views on life changed i noticed that the evil that i witnessed on a daily basis was counterbalanced by the sheer beauty & love that is possible in this life.

Apart from a few joints as a teenager i have never taken any drugs (excl the mandatory weekend alcohol binges)so all the views & conclusions i have come from my so called sane mind. Recently, out of the blue, i have been getting these strange, inexplicable feelings that my spirit is far greater than my body can hold & that my mind can do wonderous things if given the chance. I also feel increasingly frustrated that as free human being i am being controlled/manipulated by too many external groups of people.

I believe strongly in karma/fate and, after a recent relationship breakdown i find myself renting a room with a friend who shares similar thoughts & feelings. He has recently smoked Salvia (I think that was its name) and loved it & so has now procured the necessary materials to make a DMT brew (can't remember what it's actual name is).

This has lead me to research DMT and it's effects and side-effects, and hence to this site. I don't necessarily need any answers to the questions i ask about life, just to confirm that the increasingly overwhelming feelings that life is greater than the one we're living are justified.

Our plan is to watch the David Icke seminar this weekend, whilst it brews, & & try it sometime after that. I've never tried drugs, as i said, especially not psychedelics and i seem to be getting more & more fearful of it as it approaches. Is there any advice you can give to a first time user about using DMT or whether it would be wise to try something less powerful first to adjust my mind to what it will experience. I seem to carry a lot of anger & frustration at life around with me & i'm worried this might manifest itself and give me a truly bad experience.

Thanks in anticipation of your help!
 
Lifes True Sceptic, I enjoyed reading your post..
Sounds like the relationship breakdown and renting of a room is the beginning of a new and exciting chapter.
I don't feel experienced enough to give you any advise on DMT.

You say you are looking to confirm the feeling that life is greater than the one we are living, I think you will be smiling!
Hope to hear some of your experiences!
 
As a mid forties fellow myself i totally relate to your new found awareness. Sort of like a positive mid life crisis. Its great to know there is more out there. Some of my friends seem to think i am becoming a religious nut and rib me but that"s cool.
I am newish to the DMT experience and have not taken ayahusca so my advice for this is not the advice of a hardened expert but for me the first thing i learn"t to do was to let go, which i always knew i needed to do, but on this substance when you let go and journey and don"t fight.... the rewards are great:grin:
I hope you have a great experience and welcome
 
Thanks for your posts!

I guess no amount of advice can stop me fearing the unknown, i just have to accept what will happen and try and enjoy the experience. It's our first time with DMT and brewing it so may not even get it right this time.

I guess mid-life is a time of change for everyone. Some of us choose to embrace it & explore the possibilities of where that change can take us, & others fight it or ignore it & continue their lives, not really knowing what life was about until they die and find the experience that way.

Whatever happens, my perception of the world & how it operates has already changed and i'm now looking to find my own place within this & other dimensions!

:)
 
I think it's awesome how even in your 40's you are still able to break through the mental restraints put in place by our governments and able to form your own opinions on controversial topics such as drugs. However based on my experiences I can stay that starting off with other psychedelics prepared me better for dmt. Shrooms are a good starting point and lsd can be very mind opening as well. Dmt is a very powerful substance and my suggestion is to work your way up with it don't try to go to far all at once. If your worried going into your trip then the trip will reflect that. I'm not saying thats a bad thing though because some of the most profound, mind expanding trips I've had came from similar situations. I do recommend experimenting with some of the other psychedelics that arent as powerful as dmt first. But in all actuality it really comes down to you. Do you think your ready to confront certain aspects of yourself that you might not like or might be shocked to learn? Some people this comes with ease and they delve right into the psychedelic culture. Others get scared away, fearful to touch them again. Go with your heart and never let one experience hold you back from others.
 
Thanks DA!

I'm going to try Salvia first & see how i react to that. My first time with DMT will be a low dose affair to hopefully experience it without the "Breakthrough" as i'm sure that would freak me out as my first pyschedelic experience.
 
Lifes True Sceptic said:
as i'm sure that would freak me out as my first pyschedelic experience.
Click to expand...

I wouldn't recommend Salvia for your first go...Freak Out is almost certainly what you will get...

As recommended above a low dose of shrooms would ease you in nicely....Salvia...no no no.
 
That's a shame CYB as my friend has some Salvia available and no propsect of some shrooms! May just watch him & see how it goes.
 
cyb said:
I wouldn't recommend Salvia for your first go...Freak Out is almost certainly what you will get...

As recommended above a low dose of shrooms would ease you in nicely....Salvia...no no no.
Click to expand...

^^^^^^+1^^^^^:shock:
 
Lifes True Sceptic,

Welcome to the Nexus. I enjoyed reading your Introduction Essay. I'm so pleased that the Nexus has had a recent minor influx of folks with over four decades life experience recently.

I encourage you to take a good long look around this place - I think you will be pleased at the depth and quality of resource(s) you find here. As well as the people.

In terms of your concerns regarding a first experience. . . .it's okay to go slow and low. Take your time - don't rush things. Dose only when it and the time feels right. Set and setting are perfect, etc. Low doses are fine. With low doses you can always take more later if it's not enough. With too high doses . . . .

Be prepared for a heavy body load - a feeling of weight/heaviness, potentially a feeling that breathing or heartbeat have stopped or that you have left your body. Try to understand that this is all your mind - you can trust your body to stay alive even if you disconnect from it. You can also trust it to bring you back when the time is right.

Try to meet everything with letting go and surrender. Try to return love, no matter what happens.


But, overall, I'd say don't worry too much. DMT is fundamentally safe - it's a neurotransmitter and your body and mind know what to do with it.

I look forward to hearing about your first experience and seeing your posts around here.

Again, a warm welcome to you.
 
Same age, similar pattern. DMT was ( and will be every time) THE most amazing experience I ever had. Period.
I arrived finally "meeting" a friend that later told me he had DMT, " I have been reading about it for 2 years" I answered. Then I tried it. Of course it was all by chance....

Keep looking! It gets more confusing....


Lifes True Sceptic said:
Thanks DA!

I'm going to try Salvia first & see how i react to that. My first time with DMT will be a low dose affair to hopefully experience it without the "Breakthrough" as i'm sure that would freak me out as my first pyschedelic experience.
Click to expand...
 
DimensionAscension said:
I think it's awesome how even in your 40's you are still able to break through the mental restraints put in place by our governments and able to form your own opinions on controversial topics such as drugs.
Click to expand...

Yeah. Most of us aren't even slave owners any more, and begrudgingly allow women the right to eat indoors and everything.

Thank god we've got the 20 year olds to tell us how it is.
 
Thanks for the laugh, Art. You made my wife come and ask what was in my tea and that's no small feat.

I'm about to hit 40 and I have to say it never was easier to flush preconceptions down the toilet. I think the older I become, the less full of crap I get. But that might be just the drugs.

Lifes True Sceptic, you might have a rebirth around the corner. Enjoy it, and welcome.
 
Uncle Knucles said:
Yeah. Most of us aren't even slave owners any more, and begrudgingly allow women the right to eat indoors and everything.

Thank god we've got the 20 year olds to tell us how it is.
Click to expand...
true dat and all the other youthful phrases i have learnt in my decrepitude . Or do i sound like the dad that shouldnt be at the discoteque at this time of night? Thats it, a cup of horlicks and im off to bed , my varicose veins cant take this anymore.
 
You can count me in with the 40ish psychedelic renaissance club as well, I definitely relate to a lot of the things that have been said here by pretty much everyone. :thumb_up: Unlike the OP I did have my share of significant experiences "back in the day", the majority of which were great. But things strayed in a bad direction and after scaring my wife a few times with freakout flashback trips, a very long break was in order. After being together for what felt like at least a few lifetimes we split up 5-6 years back, and the time since then has been very transformative, mostly in an intellectual/spiritual/personal awakening sort of way that didn't start including psychedelics until more recently, as the next step in my development

I've been easing my way back into psychs for nearly a year now, and even though I currently have the means for a deep changa or aya session, I'm still not in any big rush for my next attempt. There's a lot of reality that needs dealing with at the moment, so I consider it a bad time. Maybe in a few weeks. But for whatever it's worth, I'd +1 all the advice you've already gotten. You've been offered an abundance of wisdom! Take it a step at a time, and be particularly careful about salvia, even if it's convenient. I've avoided that one myself. A rare few like your friend seem to get along really well with it, and maybe you would too, I really don't know you well enough to guess. But based on the overall impression I've gotten from reading many many reports, I'd consider it like diving straight into the deep end.

At this point I have little choice but to deeply respect (and somewhat fear) these substances, and have done everything I can to avoid rushing back in recklessly. Naturally, the order I've progressed in seems like the most logical one to me. :lol: Not including previous LSD use, I started last year with mushrooms (mostly low dosages), then vaped DMT, DMT enhanced leaf, and oral maoi+vape. Usually attempts are seperated by at least a month for integration of lessons learned before moving on. So far, none of these experiences seem to qualify as what the veterans here would call a breakthrough, although it's pretty hard to imagine how anything could possibly get much more intense. :surprised

Next up are "real" changa (smoked DMT+MAOI), then the full on oral ayahuasca experience. Beyond that, if it feels like I'm in the right state of mind to handle it, other ayahuasca variations and possibly even Iboga (which sounds like about the most intense psychospiritual/physical ordeal a person can go through, short of dying). And then, MAYBE, way down the line, I'll feel ready for salvia. :roll:
 
One thing I would add is to not think of psychedelics as "drugs"- it is unfortunate that society has put labels on everything and put so many things into categories , moral ones, good and bad ones, and therefore they pick up attributes that they do not deserve.

Psychedelics can be used inappropriately by people who just want fun times, but you are obviously not one of those people- you are searching, and want to use them as a quest vehicle, there cannot be a more noble reason. Fear is inevitable, and ironically, it is something of which I believe you will acquire a greater understanding of with a psychedelic journey. Psychedelics are often very spiritual for folks, and what is also ironic in that, is that along with fear, which you most likely will have, you can also have some faith when you take the journey. Organic psychedelics are something that your body will, as someone mentioned above, know how to handle, and will interact with each individual in accordance with who you are, and align you with everyone simultaneously. I am misquoting this- but the phrase about "the truth will set you free"- there is a preceeding line that basically states, before it sets you free, you have to go through discomfort first- I think psychedelics do that- you can't break out of a shell of blissful ignorance into which we've all been born and expect such uncharted territory into the raw corners of the unknown be comfortable, but that is what makes it so triumphant, engaging, bittersweet, and catalyzes a will beyond what conscious existence is privy to. But you will return, and I hope be all the happier for it, my friend!
 
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