Dose: 14mg on eMesh
Shulgin Scale: +++
I have been meaning to try and combine DMT & meditation together but the last few months since having DMT have been so hectic that I've only had time to do one or the other. On the solstice I decided it was proper to make time for both.
I spent the day reading mahayana sutras and was in a very good state of mind going into the trip. Right around solar midnight I loaded up my eMesh with 14mg and set the mod on a tray next to my cushion. It's difficult to explain the style of meditation that I do, but the most familiar analogue to most people would be Zen (albeit not quite exactly). For those well versed in Buddhism, Trekcho is my meditation.
After a while I was in a rather psychedelic samadhi. The room had faded out and waves of light were radiating all around. I leaned forward to stretch out my back, twisting left and right, then picked up the vape and took the puff, holding in for 10s before breathing out. My plan was simple... Whatever it is, however it is, let it pass without resisting or chasing. Simple! Simple? Not so simple...
After I exhaled I felt an immense rush overtake me. I was doing 14mg doses recently and was expecting the intensity to be about the same, but it was so far from it. The hallway in front of me burst into patterns and light, the door at the end turning into a mythical gateway. There was so much intensity rushing at me I felt like I was in a wind tunnel.
I felt overwhelmed, almost panicked, but forced myself to regain composure and lean forward into the rushing energy. I was almost at the peak and I heard voices whispering all around me, same as prior experiences with local entities. The gateway was pulling me in and I felt a presence behind me. It was speaking, but I couldn't understand it verbally. Still, I felt like it was encouraging me, to do what? This is when the peak came.
I was fully immersed now in the visuals and I felt like I was about to breakthrough. This felt extremely unexpected, and while I had intended not to resist nor coax anything that happens I did get a bit concerned... Would I still sit like a stone? Would I fall forward? Would I fall back? Is my coffee table right behind me? Will I hit my head?
I pulled back, took a few deep breaths, and it seemed to have subsided a bit. I felt a bit more relaxed, the visuals began to die down after a few moments. The voices were gone, whatever presence I felt behind me was also not there any more.
"What the f*#@ just happen?" came out of my mouth as I pulled my legs out of my meditation pose. I laughed, catching my spirits for a moment, a bit dumbfounded. I didn't know if I should feel disappointed because I held back... or excited because I found the approach to be so conductive. I settled on the latter.
One small detail to note... The typical body load I feel, and the weird writhing around that my body does, was not there like other recent trips. It's like all of that intensity was channeled outwards instead of inwards. I wonder how much of this has to do with the posture and how much of it has to do with the samadhi. Both of my Buddhist teachers have been adamant about meditative posture being essential in aligning the channels of the subtle body.
Shulgin Scale: +++
I have been meaning to try and combine DMT & meditation together but the last few months since having DMT have been so hectic that I've only had time to do one or the other. On the solstice I decided it was proper to make time for both.
I spent the day reading mahayana sutras and was in a very good state of mind going into the trip. Right around solar midnight I loaded up my eMesh with 14mg and set the mod on a tray next to my cushion. It's difficult to explain the style of meditation that I do, but the most familiar analogue to most people would be Zen (albeit not quite exactly). For those well versed in Buddhism, Trekcho is my meditation.
After a while I was in a rather psychedelic samadhi. The room had faded out and waves of light were radiating all around. I leaned forward to stretch out my back, twisting left and right, then picked up the vape and took the puff, holding in for 10s before breathing out. My plan was simple... Whatever it is, however it is, let it pass without resisting or chasing. Simple! Simple? Not so simple...
After I exhaled I felt an immense rush overtake me. I was doing 14mg doses recently and was expecting the intensity to be about the same, but it was so far from it. The hallway in front of me burst into patterns and light, the door at the end turning into a mythical gateway. There was so much intensity rushing at me I felt like I was in a wind tunnel.
I felt overwhelmed, almost panicked, but forced myself to regain composure and lean forward into the rushing energy. I was almost at the peak and I heard voices whispering all around me, same as prior experiences with local entities. The gateway was pulling me in and I felt a presence behind me. It was speaking, but I couldn't understand it verbally. Still, I felt like it was encouraging me, to do what? This is when the peak came.
I was fully immersed now in the visuals and I felt like I was about to breakthrough. This felt extremely unexpected, and while I had intended not to resist nor coax anything that happens I did get a bit concerned... Would I still sit like a stone? Would I fall forward? Would I fall back? Is my coffee table right behind me? Will I hit my head?
I pulled back, took a few deep breaths, and it seemed to have subsided a bit. I felt a bit more relaxed, the visuals began to die down after a few moments. The voices were gone, whatever presence I felt behind me was also not there any more.
"What the f*#@ just happen?" came out of my mouth as I pulled my legs out of my meditation pose. I laughed, catching my spirits for a moment, a bit dumbfounded. I didn't know if I should feel disappointed because I held back... or excited because I found the approach to be so conductive. I settled on the latter.
One small detail to note... The typical body load I feel, and the weird writhing around that my body does, was not there like other recent trips. It's like all of that intensity was channeled outwards instead of inwards. I wonder how much of this has to do with the posture and how much of it has to do with the samadhi. Both of my Buddhist teachers have been adamant about meditative posture being essential in aligning the channels of the subtle body.